Like losing your luggage, but so not really

Move over, Harry Potter: Delta makes dog wholly disappear from flight

Move over, Harry Potter: Delta makes dog wholly disappear from flight

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Paco, the lost dog

Aren't love stories uplifting? Feel free to swoon along with us for this fairytale.

Boy meets Girl. Boy and Girl couple up. Boy and Girl commit to Pivotal Relationship Point #1 - Vacationing Together (in Puerto Vallarta, but that's not required). Boy and Girl meet puppy-eyed Dog, a vagabond of a canine looking to renounce his Mexican citizenship for the good life up north.

Boy and Girl take the requisite next step before procreation — Pivotal Relationship Point #2 - Dog Adoption. Boy and Girl take Dog to get some shots (not of Jose Cuervo, mind you), a few baths, and a couple rounds of antibiotics. Presto change-o, Dog is ready to join Boy and Girl's newly minted family!

Boy and Girl must return to the colder climes of their home country, Canada.  Boy and Girl purchase an airline-approved tricked-out cargo ride for their pimpin' new Dog. Boy and Girl fly AeroMexico to Mexico City, and switch to Delta for their flight to Detroit.

Boy and Girl arrive in Detroit. Dog, however, does not deplane in Detroit.  Boy and Girl discover that Dog never boarded in Mexico City.  Not to worry, though.  Boy and Girl are Delta-assured that Dog will be sufficiently watered, fed, and tequila-ed, and booked on the next flight to Detroit.

Boy calls the following day to get an update on Dog. Delta feigns ignorance about any such critter. Boy, after being shuffled through the involuntary-hum-inducing Muzak underground, is informed that Dog got loose and made a break for it. There are no further details on Dog.

Does this sound like the stuff of which your nightmares are made? Unfortunately, this is the reality for Josiah, his girlfriend, and their pooch, Paco.

You ask incredulously, "How on earth can an airline lose an entire living creature?"

Well, it'd definitely behoove someone to check the backyards of those Mexico City employees, papi. 'Cause it wouldn't be too savage to assume that the stool will mark the spot. But no one can be quite certain of Paco's whereabouts for the time being.

Compounding the appalling oversight, Delta presented Josiah with a mere $200 voucher as a half-assed oops-we-lost-your-dog offering — which was only the refund of the pet transportation fee. Which can only be used as a credit on future Delta flights. Future flights that Josiah and his lady love will never, ever take. Because they possess functioning brains.

After further prodding, Delta issued a sheepish apology with its tail between its legs, and added two more $200 travel vouchers to the pot. Because, you know, money is a terrific substitute for being pawed by a warm, wriggling, fuzzy little body, snuggled under the covers, enthusiastically licking your face without prompting. 

As easy as it may be, don't get that appealing display of adjectives and affections confused with a cheap Vegas hooker, folks. Money can't buy you puppy love. Now someone tell Delta.

So tell us ... how many suckers would you rip to shreds if your beloved furry family member met the same fate?