Name: Happy, as in Happy Rockefeller, Happy Hairston, Happy Gilmore, and Happy Felton.
Ethnicity: I’m a Terrier and Dachshund mixed up fella, about 19.5 pounds — 20 pounds if I’m having a ‘fat day.’ My resume says I’m an active pup who enjoys tugging, playing, and following you everywhere. Truth is, I like sitting on the couch, cuddling, and just hanging out with you. I like doing nothing. There’s only one problem with doing nothing — you never know when you’re done (tip of the Hatlo Hat to the Q-Morning Zoo). I’m housebroken and will let you know if I need to go outside. I’m easy-going and good with kids older than 10.
Birthday: February 11, 2017. I can still pass for a puppy.
Come and get me: I'm available for adoption at 11 am Friday at Citizens for Animal Protection (17555 Katy Freeway; 281-497-0591). Tell them, "Ken sent me."
An Astro pitches for animals
It’s easy to love the Houston Astros, as a team and individuals. Don’t worry about those last two games against the Yankees, we’re still in first place.
One Astro gets extra points for his love of animals and efforts to find good, permanent homes for homeless dogs and cats in Houston.
"The Lance McCullers Jr. Foundation is a nonprofit organization established by Lance and his family to invest, bring awareness, and create programs aimed at advocates for stray and homeless animals across the country. The goal is to support shelters and programs that promote pet adoptions and continue on the journey to make Houston a no-kill city.”
That’s a straight pitch from someone whose curve helped the Astros win Game 7 of the 2017 World Series.
McCullers doesn’t just pose for pictures and put his name on projects. As he recently explained to CultureMap, he gets down and dirty with the Houston Pets Alive facility on Stella Link, cleaning the place, feeding the animals, donating money, and greeting people looking to make their lives more complete by adopting a pet.
Which brings us to the Donne Di Domani ladies, who make that incredible spaghetti sauce sold at the Nutcracker Market. All the money they make at the Nutcracker goes to charity. This year, thanks to accepting credit cards for the first time, the Donnes sold every last jar in record time. I keep telling them...make more!
Last week, they asked me to pick a charity for a $5,000 Donne Di Domani donation. After reading about McCullers’ dedication to helping homeless animals, I picked Houston Pets Alive. I dropped off the check this week and took a quick tour of the facility, 8620 Stella Link Rd. They need money to buy dog beds. I told them, "Here, buy some dog beds." If you have space in your heart and home, this is the place to find your next family member.
Where's our lottery cash?
Just saw another commercial for the Texas Lottery, claiming it’s paid out $21 billion in winnings to suckers, I mean people who buy those tickets. The Lottery website says it’s doled out $27 billion for “good causes in the state of Texas, including education, veterans' services, and other important state programs.”
And yet our school districts are reeling from budget cutbacks and teachers are underpaid. Something doesn’t add up here. I like the way the Lottery says, “We never said that money from the Lottery would go to education.” Then how come everybody I know swears that’s what they heard, or at least that’s what they were led to believe?
The Lottery is a sucker play, the odds of you ever winning meaningful money are, as George Constanza would say, “absolute zero.” Or close to absolute zero — millions and millions to one.
And yet, our fearless leaders in Austin won’t allow casino gambling in Texas. They won’t even put casino gambling up for a vote. They know it’s a safe bet that gambling would win big time. Our state leaders are much more concerned with who pee-pees in what toilet than helping our children get a good education. Sad.
The Lottery brags that it’s paid out $27 billion for “good causes” since 1992. Bottom line, that’s peanuts compared to what casino gambling would bring to Texas.
Keep those balls!
I’m always amazed when fans in the outfield stands throw back baseballs hit by the opposing team. I’ve been to a thousand games. I’ve never caught a foul ball, forget a home run. If I ever caught a home run, I don’t care who hit it or what team he plays for, I’m keeping it.
Kathy Griffin has a head for controversy
Critics are saying that President Trump’s policies aren’t creating jobs — not true. Comedian Kathy Griffin, who absorbed major heat after holding up a fake severed head of Mr. Trump, is back at work in America. Her Laugh Your Heads Off tour begins later this month, with a stop at Jones Hall in Houston on August 20. Tickets go on sale at 10 am on May 4.
Sir Paul in Texas
Good news in Beatle Land: Paul McCartney will headline the Austin City Limits Music Festival, the weekends of October 5-7 and October 12-14 at Zilker Park. There will be 125 acts — including Metallica and Shawn Mendes — on eight stages.
Also, Yellow Submarine, the 1968 animated film featuring the Beatles’ music, has been revved up with 4K restoration and 5.1 stereo surround sound. I have no idea what that means, but it sounds good and I’ll be at the River Oaks Theatre, 7 pm on July 7, one night only.
Dog lover? Ken Hoffman introduces you to an adorable pup available for adoption in Houston every Thursday.