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    if i had a tail

    Award-winning Houston bar returns after short closure with big upgrades and exciting news

    Eric Sandler
    Sep 18, 2023 | 5:58 pm

    Changes have come to Monkey’s Tail. The CultureMap Tastemaker Award-winning neighborhood bar in Lindale Park returned to service this weekend after an almost month-long closure for some behind the scenes renovations and upgrades.

    Those changes are only the start. As it prepares to open a second location in Conroe next month (hopefully) and Grease Monkey, a new concept in the former Petrol Station space in the spring, Monkey’s Tail owner Jessie Gonzalez has made other changes, too.

    First, the bar’s food truck is in the process of being replaced with a permanent kitchen that will take approximately six months to build. Second, beverage director Lainey Collum is stepping into the operations role formerly occupied by Steven Ripley, who will maintain a part-time consulting role on the food offerings at both bars.

    “Monkey’s Tail has morphed into something different than what it started. It just keeps growing,” Gonzalez tells CultureMap. “We want things to flow better. If you want to open multiple locations, you have to have structure.”

    He adds that he’s amazing that new people still visit the bar four years into its existing, coming from places as far away as Conroe and Katy. All of the changes are designed to deal with the growing crowds and plan for the future.

    “It’s growing pains,” Collum adds. “The volume keeps getting bigger. It’s an amazing problem to have. How do we make the bar more functional to deal with that, so people don’t have super long waits?”

    Physically, those structures start with improvements to the inner patio. It now features a U-shaped floating roof designed to provide more shade and protection from the rain than the umbrellas it replaces. The roof complements an outdoor bar and helps make the patio more comfortable. Adding new TVs mean Astros fans will be able to root for the team both indoors and outside during this year’s playoff run.

    “We’re trying to get ourselves ready for patio season,” Collum explains. “We also do a big Christmas celebration, a Feliz Navidad thing with a big Christmas tree and tons of decorations. We want to blow it out as big as it can be.”

    Similarly, the decision to replace the bar’s food food truck with a full kitchen reflects Gonzalez and Collum’s interests in serving more people more quickly. Monkey’s Tail’s weekend brunch service has become increasingly popular, and Monday’s steak night has doubled its revenue over the past couple of years.

    “We’ve gone over 200 steaks a night,” Gonzalez says. “For a bar, it’s a lot of steak.”

    While the kitchen is under construction, Monkey’s Tail will utilize guest food trucks. Elements, chef Zach McClendon’s traveling steak night pop-up that also operates the kitchen at Cottonwood, will take on steak night until the kitchen is operational.

    On the personnel side, Collum is taking the lead on operations and being granted a partnership stake in the company. She brings a wide range of experiences to her role, including working as the assistant general manager at Hay Merchant, a bar manager at The Pass & Provisions, the beverage director for Prohibition, and a management role at Yauatcha, the stylish dim sum restaurant from the international Hakkasan Group. Now, she’s accepted the challenge of being an owner and applying some of those fine dining standards to a casual, come-as-you-are, neighborhood bar.

    “I have a very varied background of all different types of places, but I do have a high end pedigree,” she says. “I switched over to a more casual concept, because in my mind, that’s where the bar world is going. Nothing against fine dining, it’s amazing, but as far as longevity goes, it’s tough.”

    Collum’s most immediate responsibility is opening Monkey’s Tail’s second location in Conroe (2017 N. Frazier St.). Announced last year, it’s expected to open in October.

    Conroe residents can expect the full Monkey's Tail menu — including wings, tacos, and the signature Chango Burger, along with all of its popular stirred, shaken, and frozen cocktails. Events such as steak night will also make the journey north. If Conroe proves to be successful, Gonzalez has his eye on other cities for additional locations, including Katy and Brenham.

    Once Conroe is up and running, Collum will turn her attention to Grease Monkey. The project has been delayed for a variety of reasons, but is expected to open by mid-2024. As in the Petrol Station days, draft beer will remain a core part of the bar’s offerings, along with cocktails and a slimmed-down version of the Monkey’s Tail food menu to allow for its smaller kitchen.

    “We don’t want to take it lightly. We can take Monkey’s Tail and replicate it in Conroe. That’s not what Grease Monkey is,” Collum says.

    “With Steven leaving the group, I don’t want to say what it’s going to be. It might change a little bit.”

    Ultimately, Gonzalez and Collum share the same goal of making the original Monkey’s Tail and any related locations durable Houston institutions. With the right systems in place, they plan to serve customers for years to come.

    “We want to be here for the long term,” Gonzalez says. “I know it’s hard for bars to do that, but Little Woodrow’s has. If they can do it, why can’t we?”

    A look inside Monkey's Tail.

    Monkey's Tail interior
    Photo by Shannon O'Hara

    Monkey's Tail has reopened after a month away.

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    Coming soon to Fredericksburg

    Houston restaurant vet serves up Roman-style eatery in the Hill Country

    Brandon Watson
    Dec 26, 2025 | 3:30 pm
    Bottega Salaria Fredericksburg
    Photo courtesy of Bottega Salaria
    Valerio Lombardozzi is opening Bottega Salaria in the former home of La Bergerie.

    Valerio Lombardozzi’s culinary career has taken him to the world’s finest kitchens, including restaurants owned by icons like Alain Ducasse, Giorgio Locatelli, and Joël Robuchon. In Houston, he led La Table and Tavola, where he earned a reputation for being one of the city's most engaging front of the house personalities.

    But his latest project might be his biggest accomplishment yet. The hospitality veteran is opening Bottega Salaria, a homey Italian osteria and artisan market, in the former home of La Bergerie at 312 E Austin St in his adopted home of Fredericksburg.

    Lombardozzi says the restaurant, expected to arrive in winter 2026, fills a gap in the Hill Country dining scene, but, more importantly, it's a reflection of his personal history and time spent working at his family’s restaurant in Rome.

    “[It’s about] where I grew up, how I grew up, and how I eat,” he shares.

    The three-concept experience is inspired by Italy’s Via Salaria, the ancient route Italians used to transport salt from the Adriatic Sea to Rome. The menu acts as a sort of travelogue, borrowing from the different cultures along the road, and the way village fishermen and shepherds ate.

    Lombardozzi is quick to say he didn’t want to open a chef-driven restaurant. Instead, the osteria will serve traditional Roman staples such as cacio e pepe, amatriciana, carbonara, saltimbocca with sage and prosciutto, and branzino carved tableside.

    “I was one of the last to be exposed to the old generation of professionals who knew how to carve elegantly for the guests,” he says.

    The adjacent bottega will stay open during restaurant hours, offering fresh pasta made on-site, house-made sauces, imported Italian pantry items, cheeses, salumi, breads, and biscotti. Patrons will be able to shop for individual items or put together custom gift baskets.

    Outdoors, La Fraschetteria will debut a new hospitality experience in the U.S. The self-guided experience invites diners to grab wine directly from garden shelves, gather a spread of meats, cheeses, bread, or pasta, and linger around long communal tables lit by string lights.

    Keeping the chit-chat going will be a thoughtful beverage program anchored by a primarily Italian wine list and imported beer. Lombardozzi says the cocktail menu might be a surprise, offering only gin and tonics, spritzes, and negronis. The latter has been made into a game where diners roll dice to determine the evening's combination of gin, vermouth, and bitters.

    After dinner, guests can select an amaro from a rolling cart, sip grappa and limoncello, or sip a neat whiskey.

    Lombardozzi shares that he wants Bottega Salaria to be just as comfortable for Fredericksburg locals as it is for destination travelers. Beyond daily service, Bottega Salaria plans community events such as garden wine nights with live music, Sunday movie nights, and hands-on cooking classes.

    The space is designed for ease with a warm palette combining olive green and pomegranate reds. The decor blends heritage and modernity, bringing in objects like antique mirrors, plates, custom-made lamps, and even old tablecloths and curtains for an Old World feel.

    "We’re not just opening a restaurant,” Lombardozzi says. “We’re creating a gathering place. A home for everyone who loves Italian food, culture, and the joy of sharing a meal with others.”

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