weekend event planner

Here are the top 15 things to do in Houston this weekend

This weekend is all about food — or at least, mostly about food.

It kicks off with the grand opening celebration for a food hall that began serving customers last year and continues with a party on Friday night headlined by the city’s newest James Beard Award winner. On Saturday night, food fanatics can head to Sugar Land for a new festival that features more than 30 of the city’s best chefs.

Beyond that, comedy fans will find a few opportunities to tickle their funny bones, and film buffs can celebrate the music of Star Wars. Elsewhere, Houstonians can take a trip to Taiwan without leaving the Beltway.

Here are our picks for this weekend’s best bets.

Thursday, May 16

Conservatory Midtown Grand Opening Weekend
Pallet Jax, Stesti Beer Garden, TerraRium Bar, and all of the other vendors at Conservatory Midtown are set to celebrate their opening in the vibrant heart of Houston. The grand opening weekend promises a collaboration of cultural experiences, mouth watering flavors, and various live music performers. It kicks off with an exclusive "soft opening.” The TerraRium Bar VIP Event invites guests to indulge in a night of candlelight cocktails, featuring complimentary light bites, sponsored cocktails, and a champagne toast. More events continue throughout the weekend, including both day and night markets on Saturday. 6 pm.

Covenant House Texas presents Night of Broadway Stars
Covenant House Texas, a shelter providing housing and support services, will host the third annual Night of Broadway Stars to raise funds and awareness for the safety and support services Covenant House provides to young people who are seeking freedom from homelessness and trafficking. Hosted by Broadway actress/performer Rita Harvey, the show also includes a performance by Covenant House Texas youth, as they share personal stories of the life-changing experiences they have had as a result of the help they received. 6 pm.

Chocolate And Art Inc. presents Chocolate and Art Show
With this two-day extravaganza of creative and confectionary delights, immerse yourself in the vibrant talents of Houston's emerging artists, photographers, and creators. The Chocolate and Art show offers something for everyone, from live body painting and dynamic musical performances to intricate face-painting, live portraits, and complimentary chocolates for all attendees. The show is strictly 21+. 7 pm.

Last Concert Amphitheater presents Lewberger
Lewberger, composed of Keith Habersberger (of The Try Guys), Alex Lewis, and Hughie Stone Fish, is a three-man comedy band based in Los Angeles, which got a standing ovation on America’s Got Talent and were finalists on NBC’s Bring The Funny. Their viral songs have been heard by millions online and on TV. They’ve also been described as the illegitimate love child of Lonely Island and Flight of the Conchords. 8 pm.

Friday, May 17

Asia Society Texas presents Homegrown Houston: All Asian, No Fusion With Street to Kitchen
Asia Society Texas presents the cuisines of Houston at this special tasting tour with James Beard Award winner Chef G (Benchawan Jabthong Painter) and her husband Graham Painter of Street to Kitchen. G and Graham have curated a selection of stand-out, innovative chefs, including CultureMap Tastemaker Award winners such as Manabu Horiuchi (Kata Robata and Katami), Gabe Medina, Tony Nguyen (Xin Chao), and Vanarin Kuch (Koffeteria). Each will present a dish that showcases their stories as chefs and, in turn, reflects the diversity and ingenuity of the Houston food scene. Tickets are inclusive of one dish from each chef/vendor, drinks, and entry to the exhibition. 7 pm.

The Museum of Fine Arts, Houston presents Five Funny French Films
The 12th edition of the Five Funny French Films series brings a fresh lineup of new comedies. Get ready for the latest round of hijinks, hilarity, and memorable characters. The quintet of films include The (Ex)perience of Love (Le syndrome des amours passées), Our Tiny Little Wedding (Notre tout petit petit mariage), Mr. Putifar’s Wacky Plan (Les Vengeances de Maître Poutifard), The Madness Express (Veuillez nous excuser pour la gêne occasionnée), and The Crime Is Mine (Mon crime). 7 & 9:15 pm (5 pm Sunday).

The Hobby Center and Jazz Houston present Live at the Founders Club: Sophisticated Lady - The Songs of Natalie Cole starring Belinda Munro
Sophisticated Lady is a night of musical magic, glamor, and sophistication with the talented Belinda Munro and the Jazz Houston Ambassadors. Munro’s powerful yet soulful vocals and stage presence will take the audience on a journey honoring each era of Natalie Cole’s career. The tribute evening features some of the most beloved hits from Cole’s 40-year career, including "Unforgettable," "Orange Colored Sky," "Our Love," "This Will Be," and more favorites. 7:30 pm (7 pm Saturday).

Houston Symphony presents "The Music of Star Wars"
Audiences will travel to galaxies far, far away as the Houston Symphony performs favorite music from across the Star Wars universe, from “Rey’s Theme” to “Yoda’s Theme” and “The Imperial March.” The concert will feature music from all nine films in the Skywalker saga, performed in chronological order, plus selections from Rogue One and Solo. The concert will be conducted by Steven Reineke. 8 pm (2:30 & 8 pm Saturday; 2:30 pm Sunday).

Saturday, May 18

Taiwanese Heritage Society of Houston presents Taiwan Festival Houston
Guests can embark on a journey through the world of Taiwanese heritage through experiences, activities, and culture. Attendees will get to indulge in a Taiwanese Puppet Show, boba milk tea DIY, sky lantern making, mochi display and DIY, Taiwanese honeycomb toffee crafting, daikon lantern DIY, temple culture booth, creative face painting, calligraphy sessions, Taiwan fun facts, a folding balloon show, and more. 10 am.

In Conversation | Theaster Gates with Charonda Johnson and Hesse McGraw
Join artist Theaster Gates, alongside Ryan N. Dennis, Charonda Johnson, and Hesse McGraw, for a lively conversation about the exhibition, Theaster Gates: The Gift and The Renege. They will also discuss the impacts of the Rebirth in Action initiative. Gates’s exhibition features large-scale tar paintings, sculptures, and installations that highlight the seen and unseen dynamics of Freedmen’s Town in Houston’s Fourth Ward. This free talk is expected to fill up fast, so make sure to register. 3:30 pm.

Bazaar Food and Wine
Bazaar Food and Wine is an immersive, multicultural celebration of Houston’s diverse culture and culinary scene. Through food, drink, dance, music, fashion, and design, Bazaar Food and Wine will transport guests to six unique neighborhood destinations and immersive culinary and live entertainment activations (featuring an all-star lineup of 40 of Houston’s most prominent chefs) throughout Sugar Land Town Square, highlighting Latin America, India and Pakistan, Asia, Africa and the Middle East, Europe, and Texas. See our article with more details here. 5 pm.

Michelle Wolf: It’s Great to Be Here Tour
Michelle Wolf comes to Houston as part of her It’s Great to Be Here Tour. A former writer/performer for The Daily Show and Late Night with Seth Meyers. Wolf has quickly become one of the most influential voices in the comedy landscape. Her most recent Netflix special, Michelle Wolf: Joke Show received high praise, and her first hour-long stand-up special, Michelle Wolf: Nice Lady, which premiered on HBO in 2017, earned a Primetime Emmy nomination for Outstanding Writing For A Variety Special.

Sunday, May 19

Archaeology Now presents “In Baba’s Kitchen”
As part of the Ukraine Project, Archaeology Now presents “In Baba’s Kitchen,” a unique cooking class and tasting event led by the Ukrainian team of husband-and-wife chefs Bek Mamat and Irina Mamataliyev and noted Houston and Czechoslovakian-born chef Monica Pope, who will teach participants how to make borscht and pierogi and the proper way to drink vodka. Guests will be welcomed by the Ukrainian Consul General, the Honorable Vitalii Tarasiuk. 3 pm.

Love Street Music Fest ‘24
[UPDATE: This event has been postponed due to Thursday night's storms.]

Musica Tra Amici presents The Return of Ayke Agus
Musica Tra Amici's special guest artist for this concert, Ayke Agus, is originally from Indonesia with Chinese, Dutch, and Javanese ancestry. Dr. Agus will share anecdotes from her life among the legendary musicians, discuss the nuance of the interpretation in the Romantic style they embodied, and perform music with Musica Tra Amici co-artistic directors Eric Halen and Brinton Averil Smith, including the Brahms B major piano trio, works of Rachmaninoff, Tchaikovsky and many of the transcriptions on which she collaborated with Mr. Heifetz. 7 pm.

Benchawan Graham Painter Street to Kitchen

Photo by Eric Sandler

Join Chef G and Graham Painter from Street to Kitchen at Asia Society Texas.

event-planner

Movie Review

Meta-comedy remake Anaconda coils itself into an unfunny mess

Photo by Matt Grace

Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda.

In Hollywood’s never-ending quest to take advantage of existing intellectual property, seemingly no older movie is off limits, even if the original was not well-regarded. That’s certainly the case with 1997’s Anaconda, which is best known for being a lesser entry on the filmography of Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez, as well as some horrendous accent work by Jon Voight.

The idea behind the new meta-sequel Anaconda is arguably a good one. Four friends — Doug (Jack Black), Griff (Paul Rudd), Claire (Thandiwe Newton), and Kenny (Steve Zahn) — who made homemade movies when they were teenagers decide to remake Anaconda on a shoestring budget. Egged on by Griff, an actor who can’t catch a break, the four of them pull together enough money to fly down to Brazil, hire a boat, and film a script written by Doug.

Naturally, almost nothing goes as planned in the Amazon, including losing their trained snake and running headlong into a criminal enterprise. Soon enough, everything else takes second place to the presence of a giant anaconda that is stalking them and anyone else who crosses its path.

Written and directed by Tom Gormican, with help from co-writer Kevin Etten, the film is designed to be an outrageous comedy peppered with laugh-out-loud moments that cover up the fact that there’s really no story. That would be all well and good … if anything the film had to offer was truly funny. Only a few scenes elicit any honest laughter, and so instead the audience is fed half-baked jokes, a story with no focus, and actors who ham it up to get any kind of reaction.

The biggest problem is that the meta-ness of the film goes too far. None of the core four characters possess any interesting traits, and their blandness is transferred over to the actors playing them. And so even as they face some harrowing situations or ones that could be funny, it’s difficult to care about anything they do since the filmmakers never make the basic effort of making the audience care about them.

It’s weird to say in a movie called Anaconda, but it becomes much too focused on the snake in the second half of the film. If the goal is to be a straight-up comedy, then everything up to and including the snake attacks should be serving that objective. But most of the time the attacks are either random or moments when the characters are already scared, and so any humor that could be mined all but disappears.

Black and Rudd are comedy all-stars who can typically be counted on to elevate even subpar material. That’s not the case here, as each only scores on a few occasions, with Black’s physicality being the funniest thing in the movie. Newton is not a good fit with this type of movie, and she isn’t done any favors by some seriously bad wigs. Zahn used to be the go-to guy for funny sidekicks, but he brings little to the table in this role.

Any attempt at rebooting/remaking an old piece of IP should make a concerted effort to differentiate itself from the original, and in that way, the new Anaconda succeeds. Unfortunately, that’s its only success, as the filmmakers can never find the right balance to turn it into the bawdy comedy they seemed to want.

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Anaconda is now playing in theaters.

movies film