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    Can't Miss Concerts

    5 can't-miss concerts in 2016: Superstar singers have H-Town on their agendas

    Marcy de Luna
    Marcy de Luna
    Jan 3, 2016 | 10:44 am

    The 2016 lineup of stellar concerts at Toyota Center has got us dancing in our seats. We’ve pulled together our top picks for some of the hottest tickets in town. Below are five can't-miss concerts at the downtown venue, 2016.

    Madonna

    The one-and-only Madonna brings her Rebel Heart Tour to Houston on January 12.

    Expect pole dancers dressed like nuns and Mike Tyson, nonstop theatrics and, of course, show-stopping hits spanning the superstar’s illustrious career including "Living for Love," "Ghosttown," and "Bitch I'm Madonna," all featured on Madonna's thirteenth and latest studio album, Rebel Heart, along with old familiar faves like "Holiday," "Material Girl," and "Like A Virgin."

    Don’t skip the Material Girl beat: For complete details on the 64-city world tour, including ticket information, head to Madonna's website.

    Janet Jackson

    UPDATE: Janet Jackson rescheduled her Houston concert to July 13 after undergoing successful surgery to remove a growth on her vocal chord.

    The New Year looks to be off to a rockin’ good start as Janet Jackson (Miss Jackson, if you're nasty) is also scheduled to roll into H-town this month.

    The pop and R&B singer’s Unbreakable World Tour includes a stop at Toyota Center on January 23.

    The seventh tour for Jackson touts the superstar’s 11th studio album, Unbreakable, featuring hit single, "No Sleeep." The LP debuted at number one on the Billboard 200 in October, becoming Jackson's seventh album to top the chart in the United States.

    Get full concert details online at Jackson’s website.

    Rihanna

    For the first time in nearly three years, Rihanna returns to Houston on March 5 as part of her Anti World Tour.

    Although the tour is in support of Rihanna's eighth studio effort, Anti, the release date of the album is still unknown; however, singles including "FourFiveSeconds" with Kanye West and Paul McCartney, "American Oxygen," and "Bitch Better Have My Money" have already hit the airwaves giving fans a taste of what’s to come.

    Travi$ Scott, who released his debut album Rodeo in 2015, will open for RiRi. If his name sounds familiar, it may be because the Houston hip-hop artist opened for, and performed a few songs with, The Weeknd last month when The Madness Fall Tour hit town.

    Tickets went on sale last month.

    Justin Bieber

    Music to the ears of H-town Beliebers, the Bayou City has landed a spot on Justin Bieber's 58-city Purpose World Tour with a performance slotted for April 9.

    Bieber's career, which has suffered in recent years due to a lack of hits — and a surplus of negative press for the teen titan’s bad boy behavior, from egging a neighbor’s house to urinating in public — is on the rise again as Purpose, the 21-year-old’s fourth LP, has produced a string of hit singles including “Sorry,” “Love Yourself,” “What Do You Mean?” and "Where R Ü Now," a collaboration with electronic dance music masters Diplo and Skrillex.

    For tour and ticket information, click on AEG Live’s website.

    Adele

    Adele will say "Hello" to Houston with two concert dates at Toyota Center: November 8 and 9.

    The Grammy Award-winning singer's first tour in five years shines the spotlight on the 27-year-old's third album, 25. Released on November 20, 25, which features runaway hit single "Hello," shot straight to No. 1 in more than 100 countries.

    According to Toyota Center's website, both shows are sold out.

    There's more

    Other notables coming to Houston's Toyota Center in 2016 include Carrie Underwood (April 19), The Cure (May 14), Selena Gomez (June 15) and Demi Lovato/Nick Jonas (September 9).

    Music to the ears of H-town Beliebers, the Bayou City has landed a spot on Justin Bieber's 58-city Purpose World Tour with a performance slotted for April 9.

    Houston, Justin Bieber, November 2015, Purpose album
    Justin Bieber/Facebook
    Music to the ears of H-town Beliebers, the Bayou City has landed a spot on Justin Bieber's 58-city Purpose World Tour with a performance slotted for April 9.
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    Movie Review

    Meta-comedy remake Anaconda coils itself into an unfunny mess

    Alex Bentley
    Dec 26, 2025 | 2:30 pm
    Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda
    Photo by Matt Grace
    Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda.

    In Hollywood’s never-ending quest to take advantage of existing intellectual property, seemingly no older movie is off limits, even if the original was not well-regarded. That’s certainly the case with 1997’s Anaconda, which is best known for being a lesser entry on the filmography of Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez, as well as some horrendous accent work by Jon Voight.

    The idea behind the new meta-sequel Anaconda is arguably a good one. Four friends — Doug (Jack Black), Griff (Paul Rudd), Claire (Thandiwe Newton), and Kenny (Steve Zahn) — who made homemade movies when they were teenagers decide to remake Anaconda on a shoestring budget. Egged on by Griff, an actor who can’t catch a break, the four of them pull together enough money to fly down to Brazil, hire a boat, and film a script written by Doug.

    Naturally, almost nothing goes as planned in the Amazon, including losing their trained snake and running headlong into a criminal enterprise. Soon enough, everything else takes second place to the presence of a giant anaconda that is stalking them and anyone else who crosses its path.

    Written and directed by Tom Gormican, with help from co-writer Kevin Etten, the film is designed to be an outrageous comedy peppered with laugh-out-loud moments that cover up the fact that there’s really no story. That would be all well and good … if anything the film had to offer was truly funny. Only a few scenes elicit any honest laughter, and so instead the audience is fed half-baked jokes, a story with no focus, and actors who ham it up to get any kind of reaction.

    The biggest problem is that the meta-ness of the film goes too far. None of the core four characters possess any interesting traits, and their blandness is transferred over to the actors playing them. And so even as they face some harrowing situations or ones that could be funny, it’s difficult to care about anything they do since the filmmakers never make the basic effort of making the audience care about them.

    It’s weird to say in a movie called Anaconda, but it becomes much too focused on the snake in the second half of the film. If the goal is to be a straight-up comedy, then everything up to and including the snake attacks should be serving that objective. But most of the time the attacks are either random or moments when the characters are already scared, and so any humor that could be mined all but disappears.

    Black and Rudd are comedy all-stars who can typically be counted on to elevate even subpar material. That’s not the case here, as each only scores on a few occasions, with Black’s physicality being the funniest thing in the movie. Newton is not a good fit with this type of movie, and she isn’t done any favors by some seriously bad wigs. Zahn used to be the go-to guy for funny sidekicks, but he brings little to the table in this role.

    Any attempt at rebooting/remaking an old piece of IP should make a concerted effort to differentiate itself from the original, and in that way, the new Anaconda succeeds. Unfortunately, that’s its only success, as the filmmakers can never find the right balance to turn it into the bawdy comedy they seemed to want.

    ---

    Anaconda is now playing in theaters.

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