Name: Mabel — as in actress Mabel Richardson, film director Mabel Beaton, gospel singer Mabel Scott, and British politician Mabel Ridealgh. (I have never heard of any of these people.)
Birthday: May 15, 2014. I’m practically a pup; 15 pounds of fun. You know how us small pooches live really long lives.
Ethnicity: I’m a Chihuahua and Boston Terrier combo platter. Here’s the deal: I’ll do better in a home without small children and no other female dogs. It’s just the way I am. The good news is, I’m gentle with adults and boy dogs, and I’m good on a leash and housetrained! If you’re looking for a gal pal, someone to hang out with, a real cutie-pie, I’m the dog for you.
Come and get me: I'm available for adoption at 11 am Friday, June 8 at Citizens for Animal Protection (17555 Katy Freeway; 281-497-0591). Tell them, "Ken sent me."
Mabel’s musings: Earlier this week, Delaware became the second state (after Nevada) to legalize sports betting, and my buddy Glen Macnow was first in line to lay his money down.
Glen is a big sports talk host on WIP Radio in Philadelphia. Back when, Glen and I worked together at Today Newspaper in Cocoa, Florida. He worked city side. I was in the features department. We went to jai alai in Melbourne at least twice a week.
Glen got to be first in line because he does his Saturday show at Delaware Park Racetrack and Casino, one of three betting centers in Delaware. It’s a small state. He put $10 down on the Colorado Rockies to beat the Cincinnati Reds Wednesday night and $10 on the Eagles to repeat as Super Bowl champs. (Way to suck up to the hometown listeners, Glen. In wrestling, that’s called a “cheap pop.”)
The Rockies won, so Glen is up $8.90. He should quit now, while he’s ahead. He won’t. I remember him from our jai alai days.
I’m kind of jealous of Glen. He gets to bet on sports with just a 30-minute drive from his home. I can’t do that. Even though Texans want legalized gambling, our governor and his lapdog lieutenant governor will never allow it. They’re too busy making sure that we poop and pee is the proper public restroom. Sad.
The Miss America Pageant announced it no longer will have a swimsuit competition. Good, because that puts this silly event one step closer to extinction. Any time you have a man fully clothed surrounded by women half-naked, it’s not a good idea.
When Toyota Center announced a Shania Twain concert for June 9, I thought, is she big enough to play there? And that’s how excellent seats in the lower bowl end up selling for $45 (half off) on Groupon.
Here’s another deep discount. Got a mailer to renew my subscription to Time magazine. It says, “Cover price: $263.56. Your Special Rate: $15.” I’m not a math wizard, but that’s a savings of a billion percent.
The internet: all the help, none of the racism
Unlike Roseanne Barr, I find a lot to like about the Internet. For example, this week I bought a set of new handlebar grips for my bicycle. I tried slip sliding’ them on, no luck. I sprayed the inside of the grips with WD-40, no luck. Clicked on “How to put on bicycle handlebar grips.” It said, “coat the inside of the grips with rubbing alcohol and they will slide right on.” Bingo! Worked perfectly. And I didn’t have to insult anybody’s race.
Hop over to Hopdoddy
Hopdoddy Burger Bar has some interesting new menu items. The hand-cut Kennebec fries (same type potatoes used by Nathan’s in Coney Island) are always wonderful with Parmesan Truffle or Green Chile topping.
Now Hopdoddy is tossing fries in Buffalo sauce, topped with blue cheese crumbles, chives, ranch, and hot honey. Also on the bill, Sage Fries featuring sweet potato fries smothered with sweet-spicy honey and fried sage and rosemary.
New shakes made with thick, creamy vanilla custard top the dessert bill. Recommended: S’mores with graham cracker crumbles, chocolate and toasted marshmallows, and Strawberry Shortcake makde with strawberry and vanilla buttercream and shortbread crumbles.
Dog lover? Ken Hoffman introduces you to an adorable pup available for adoption in Houston every Thursday.