Years ago, Esquire magazine conducted a search for the “Best French fries in America.” The winner was Nathan’s Famous hot dog stand on the corner of Surf and Stillwell in Coney Island at 10 am Monday morning when they change the peanut oil.
Bull’s-eye! As they say, I’m familiar with the product. I grew up on Nathan’s hot dogs and fries. Every weekend, friends and I would drive to Coney Island and fill up on those fries. Nathan’s difference: they use Katahdin potatoes from Maine and pretty much buy out the entire crop.
Warning: the Nathan’s hot dogs and fries you find in the frozen food aisle at your local supermarket ain’t the same franks ‘n’ fries you get at Coney Island.
Esquire did another ranking of fries more recently. This time KFC was the winner by a “Secretariat-like margin.” I’m not even sure that KFC’s fries qualify as fries. They’re more like puff pastry. Memo: cancel my subscription to Esquire.
Drive-through essential
I love french fries. When I’m in the drive-through, I eat all my fries before I scrounge through the napkins and ketchup packets to the bottom of the bag for my Chick-fil-A Spicy Chicken Sandwich or my Whopper or Double Meat Whataburger.
Fries are the most important item at fast food restaurants. About 70 percent of fast food orders are pushed out the drive-through window. Now fast food chains are building restaurants that are drive-through only.
When you open the bag as you pull out of the drive-through, what’s the first thing you eat? It’s a grabful of fries. First impressions. Fries can make or break a fast food chain.
Of course McDonald’s fries are the gold standard of the fast food industry. McDonald’s uses Russet Burbank, Russet Ranger, Umatilla Russet, and Shepody potatoes. People love ‘em. They’re so crisp and salty. McDonald’s burgers? Pretty just OK, really. The sign outside about “over 99 billion burgers sold” is an insult to the real star of the show. It should say, “Octovigintillions of fries served hourly.”
(Octovigintillion is a real number, by the way. It’s equal to 1x10 to the 87th power. I have no idea how many that actually is, but it sounds like a lot.)
Most times I pass on a burger and get the supersized “basket of fries” at McDonald’s. That’s your big boy. The basket is supposed to serve two or three people. That’s so cute. It’s like a pint of Blue Bell Homemade Vanilla says it contains three servings. This is America, we’re not quitters. Here’s what the nutritional label should say: “Directions: insert spoon, serves one.”
Even at an upscale sit-down restaurant with real silverware, when your plate of fish ‘n’ chips arrives, what’s the first thing you instinctively do? Grab a fry. And then you splash on the malt vinegar. If you haven’t tried malt vinegar on your fries, you’re missing out on the ultimate fry experience. Malt vinegar beats ketchup and it’s not close. And if I see you dip your fries in ranch dressing, well, one of us has to leave the table.
The lunch took place at Goode Co. Taqueria.Courtesy of Goode Co.
Houston’s best fries
Which gets me around to: I’m constantly searching for the best fries in Houston. People tell me “you’ve got to try the fries at so-and-so” and I run. My ranking is constantly changing, and there’s nothing so personal as your opinion of fries, but here goes.
My new best fries in Houston are at...
Goode Company Taqueria on Kirby. Last week I had lunch with a certain co-worker who knows a thing or 10,000 about the Houston food scene. He ordered tacos, I ordered a burger and fries.
Our food arrived, and like a Pavlov dog, I reached for a fry. And then a few more. These are different. I think I’m in love. I spun my plate around and told my co-worker, “try these, they’re fantastic.” He took a few and agreed, “Yeah, they are good.” This guy saying “they are good” is as good as it gets in this town. I’ve been back two times already for these fries.
There’s my review. My No. 1 all-time best fries in Houston are at Goode Company Taqueria — for now.
