Don't Miss List

Spanish at the Symphony, reliving Madame Butterfly & German collage power, who could ask for more?

Seeing a performance of Madame Butterfly has been a tradition in the author's family.

Editors Note: We've asked Houston arts leaders and CultureMap contributors to pick the jewels from Houston's upcoming arts season — the events that they don't plan to miss. Here's what's on the list of CultureMap's high and low culture (he's half of the hilarious Real Housewives commentating duo) extraordinaireTheodore Bale

During a stroll through an airport concourse last year, I gave in to temptation and bought one of those highly-touted Spanish language immersion programs. It’s pretty good.

By this time, however, I’m tired of speaking to the voice recognition program in my laptop. I need some real human interaction. So I’m thrilled that the Houston Symphony is offering a free concert at Jones Hall on September 12 that coincides perfectly with my eagerly anticipated autumn adult-Ed Spanish class.

The Chevron Fiesta Sinfónica Familiar features music from a variety of Hispanic composers, most of whom I’ve never heard of. Galindo’s Sones de Mariachi and Chávez: Sinfonía India will certainly set me in the right mood, along with Moncayo’s Huapango and Revueltas: Sensemayá, when I start to practice my verb conjugations. Brett Mitchell conducts this creative, one-night-only program.

It was a common ritual of my youth to enjoy a Japanese dinner with my mother and then see a great staging of Puccini’s Madame Butterfly. It sounds hokey, I know, but I’m thrilled that Houston Grand Opera is giving me another chance to relive those wonderful memories with its season-opening new production.

This staging features the work of director Michael Grandage, set and costume designer Christopher Oram, and lighting designer Neil Austin. Their recognized production of Britten’s Billy Budd at the Glyndebourne Festival is just a hint of what is sure to be a stunning version of Butterfly, the team’s first opera production for an American company.

Since the performances run from October 22 through November 5, I intend to return with a young friend who aspires to become an opera singer. She’s never seen a staged performance before, and this one is sure to win her over.

After watching dance mostly on television this month (yes, I’m a serious addict of So You Think You Can Dance), I’m eager to see some real bodies in motion, and in the company of a live audience. I’ll continue my exploration of the flourishing local contemporary dance scene at the Weekend of Texas Contemporary Dance, offered free at the Miller Outdoor Theater September 24-25. Dances performed to both live and recorded music are offered from a wide range of Houston groups, including Noble Motion Dance, Revolve Dance Company, Vault, infinite Moving Ever Evolving (iMEE), and many others.

The 11 a.m.. show on Saturday is especially intended for families, and features performances from Houston Ballet II and The Anjali Dance Company.

I’ll definitely be heading to DiverseWorks for Yasuko Yokoshi’s brilliantly weird Tyler, Tyler, on October 14-16. Films of the unusual dance stuck out most definitely during DiverseWorks’ press conference last month. With both classically-trained Kabuki dancers and contemporary artists, the goal of the event is described as “not to have the performers exchange their respective forms, but to examine the nature of cultural identity by experimenting with cultural form.” I’m there.

After the stunning last season from this presenter, in particular Morgan Thorson’s Heaven, I know that this is where I’ll find the most cutting-edge dance in the city. Original music from Steven Reker, along with scores from Sakamoto, Cat Power and Lou Reed, accompanies the dance.

In between these stunning performances, I plan to return time and again to The Menil Collection to see Kurt Schwitters: Color and Collage, which opens on October 22. The German collagist is one of my all-time favorites, and it will be the first time I’ll get to enter inside his legendary Merzbau, a chamber-like sculpture made from found material. One visit won’t be enough.

Seeing a performance of Madame Butterfly has been a tradition in the author's family.

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Movie Review

Meta-comedy remake Anaconda coils itself into an unfunny mess

Photo by Matt Grace

Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda.

In Hollywood’s never-ending quest to take advantage of existing intellectual property, seemingly no older movie is off limits, even if the original was not well-regarded. That’s certainly the case with 1997’s Anaconda, which is best known for being a lesser entry on the filmography of Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez, as well as some horrendous accent work by Jon Voight.

The idea behind the new meta-sequel Anaconda is arguably a good one. Four friends — Doug (Jack Black), Griff (Paul Rudd), Claire (Thandiwe Newton), and Kenny (Steve Zahn) — who made homemade movies when they were teenagers decide to remake Anaconda on a shoestring budget. Egged on by Griff, an actor who can’t catch a break, the four of them pull together enough money to fly down to Brazil, hire a boat, and film a script written by Doug.

Naturally, almost nothing goes as planned in the Amazon, including losing their trained snake and running headlong into a criminal enterprise. Soon enough, everything else takes second place to the presence of a giant anaconda that is stalking them and anyone else who crosses its path.

Written and directed by Tom Gormican, with help from co-writer Kevin Etten, the film is designed to be an outrageous comedy peppered with laugh-out-loud moments that cover up the fact that there’s really no story. That would be all well and good … if anything the film had to offer was truly funny. Only a few scenes elicit any honest laughter, and so instead the audience is fed half-baked jokes, a story with no focus, and actors who ham it up to get any kind of reaction.

The biggest problem is that the meta-ness of the film goes too far. None of the core four characters possess any interesting traits, and their blandness is transferred over to the actors playing them. And so even as they face some harrowing situations or ones that could be funny, it’s difficult to care about anything they do since the filmmakers never make the basic effort of making the audience care about them.

It’s weird to say in a movie called Anaconda, but it becomes much too focused on the snake in the second half of the film. If the goal is to be a straight-up comedy, then everything up to and including the snake attacks should be serving that objective. But most of the time the attacks are either random or moments when the characters are already scared, and so any humor that could be mined all but disappears.

Black and Rudd are comedy all-stars who can typically be counted on to elevate even subpar material. That’s not the case here, as each only scores on a few occasions, with Black’s physicality being the funniest thing in the movie. Newton is not a good fit with this type of movie, and she isn’t done any favors by some seriously bad wigs. Zahn used to be the go-to guy for funny sidekicks, but he brings little to the table in this role.

Any attempt at rebooting/remaking an old piece of IP should make a concerted effort to differentiate itself from the original, and in that way, the new Anaconda succeeds. Unfortunately, that’s its only success, as the filmmakers can never find the right balance to turn it into the bawdy comedy they seemed to want.

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Anaconda is now playing in theaters.

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