Lindsay Lohan terrifies parents, ruins the lives of teenagers
Who says celebrities never wear the same thing twice?
Lindsay Lohan, for one, is recycling one of her most famous fashions. The alcohol-monitoring SCRAM bracelet she was court-ordered to wear this week is actually an old favorite. She was first outfitted with the device in 2007, although this time around she's at least got the latest design — this version is said to be slightly less bulky than last season's model.
Even funnier than the purported ways to beat the bracelet (the Daily News suggests stuffing a slice of baloney in between the sensor and your ankle, or doing your drinking with one foot in an ice bath) are the overbearing parents apparently asking if they can slap one on their kids.
Um, no. Get a grip, people. And please ignore spokesperson for the maker Kathleen Brown, who all-too-eagerly tells the Associated Press, "that might be a market down the road."
To the parents who want to put a device designed for repeat offenders in the justice system on their teenagers (probably the types of parents who leashed those kids in their toddler years): Are you for real?
That's up there with installing GPS trackers in their cars, listening in on their phone calls and stalking their social media accounts. Oh, God — I'm giving them ideas.
An equally effective method might be to do what Dina and Michael Lohan obviously didn't — parent. Try it, it's all the rage.