Skip the restaurant, forget the flowers

You don't have to be rich to be romantic; how to do V-Day on the cheap

Regardless of whether you’re tightening your belt or simply rejecting the commercialism of the holiday, there are plenty of ways to celebrate V-Day without breaking the bank.

But before you embrace a budget-friendly Valentine's, make sure you’ve got the go-ahead for a cheap date. It’s integral that you know your partner’s expectations. Valentine’s break-ups are no rarity, as the hyped-up holiday can be the last straw in a series of miscommunications about the relationship’s expectations.

The best way to gage your partner’s expectations? Ask! Ask what he or she wants to do for Valentine’s. (Girls: don’t be afraid to flat-out tell him. Men aren’t mind readers.)

Luckily, guys are fairly straightforward. Although we live in the age of equality (or at least we'll pretend so for now) it's often the girl whose heart falls on Cupid's special day. Guys need a little more guidance. If you’re looking to wow your lady, remember that women just want to feel loved. That doesn’t necessarily entail a pricey gift. According to author Gary Chapman, we express love in five ways:

1. Words of affirmation

2. Spending quality time together

3. Receiving gifts

4. Acts of service

5. Physical touch

While all are important, people often prefer one above the others. For example, I appreciate acts of service, like a painstakingly decorated mix CD. Imagine my horror when a not-so-dreamy guy discarded this creation. (Don’t worry — I re-gifted it to someone more deserving.) To me, fixing my antique lamp trumps buying me dinner.

Consider how she shows you she cares. (She does do that, right?) Then try to do something in a similar vein. These ideas should steer you in the right direction:

- Forget the pricey restaurant and cook her favorite meal at home. Light candles (chicks love candles) and set the dining room table. If you’re a lousy cook, pick up something to-go from her favorite restaurant.
A word of caution — don't binge on red wine and rich food. Alcohol and a heavy meal have a narcotic effect. If you want to get frisky after dinner, opt for lighter fare. If you insist on a five course meal, consider getting physical before your enter a food coma.

-Skip the delivery and bring flowers to her work in person. Get your flowers from the Fannin flower shops (they’re cheaper and fresher than the grocery store variety). If she’s not a flora-phile, pack a blanket and a cooler of food and take her for a picnic in the park. (Houston should be 70 degrees Monday!)

Make sure to remember to clear your plan with her coworker. You don’t want to arrive to find she’s stuck in a meeting or off-site with a client.

- Steer clear of the maudlin greeting cards and teddy bears holding plush red hearts. If you want to tell her how you feel, think of When Harry Met Sally: “I love that you get cold when it's 71 degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend the day with you, I can still smell your perfume on my clothes. And I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night.”

(I wish I didn’t have to say this, but please don’t use this speech verbatim. She has seen the movie.)

- Get creative. Fill her canopy bed with balloons. This only requires a few bucks, and, depending on whether you have a pump or not, a powerful set of lungs. Hide sweet notes in her bag. Think of when your mom wrote notes on your lunch napkin. It’s OK to be a little cheesy on Valentine’s.

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Movie Review

Daniel Craig shines in Queer, an unapologetic tale of love and loss

Photo courtesy of A24

Drew Starkey and Daniel Craig in Queer.

As recently as the late 2010s, if a movie was made about an LGBTQ+ character, it was more than likely about their coming out experience. Romance, if it existed, was typically chaste, and actual sex was almost completely out of the question. Things have changed dramatically in the 2020s, to the point that a major movie star has no issue starring in a film called Queer.

Based on the 1985 novella by William S. Burroughs, the film features William Lee (Daniel Craig), whom everyone calls just Lee, a writer living in 1950s-era Mexico City who spends most of his time haunting local bars with friends like fellow writer Joe Guidry (Jason Schwartzman) and hitting on younger men. His early interactions in the film seem to indicate that Lee has a bad reputation within the local gay community, as multiple people avoid him or give him odd looks.

Lee senses an opportunity when he encounters a newcomer, Eugene Allerton (Drew Starkey). Despite some awkward interactions, the two of them start spending time together, although Lee has much more invested in the relationship than Eugene does. Their hit-and-miss bond continues until Lee, who’s starting to get into drugs in addition to the booze, convinces Eugene to accompany him on a trip to South America.

Directed by Luca Guadagnino and written by Justin Kuritzkes (making their second straight film together after Challengers), early on the film seems to be mostly about the divide between an older person who’s grown comfortable in his ways and a younger person who’s living a relatively carefree life. The introduction of drugs into the plot changes things, though, with Lee searching out more ways to open his eyes to what the world has to offer.

Guadagnino and his team use some interesting visual storytelling techniques to introduce ideas that may not be present in the actual script. The most successful, demonstrated in multiple scenes, is the superimposition of movements by Lee over what’s actually taking place in the scene. The subtle overlay gives the audience insight into Lee’s true feelings, showing what he can’t or won’t say out loud.

Music also plays a big part in how the plot is perceived, with the use of anachronistic songs from Nirvana and Prince serving to heighten certain moments. The score by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross is not as in-your-face as the one they did for Challengers, but it complements the film well, especially when the plot starts to get trippy in its final half hour.

Craig, who appears sweaty and disheveled for much of the film, is about as far from the suaveness of James Bond as you can get in this role. He takes multiple risks with his performance and almost all of them pay off. Starkey’s character is subdued by comparison, but still comes off well. Schwartzman and Lesley Manville are given showy roles, with both using altered appearances that make them nearly unrecognizable to deliver memorable performances.

Queer is not as accessible as Challengers was storytelling-wise, but the fact that it tells a story about gay men living their lives as they see fit with no interference or questions shows how far the film world has come in a short period of time. It also continues Guadagnino’s streak of making audacious films in a way that few other filmmakers are willing or able to approach.

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Queer is now playing in theaters.

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