Who Dat

Now with video: We know why you really tune in - CultureMap covers the SuperBowl commercials

I love a good underdog story, but I'll be tuning in to the Super Bowl tonight for the same reason I do every year: The commercials. So keep your computer nearby, trained on CultureMap and your finger at the refresh-button ready to read along with me as I watch and rate the ads here.

Several spots are already generating buzz (the ad geniuses at Budweiser have managed to find a fresh take on office nudity, and Tim Tebow is stealing some more time in the spotlight as a crusader for Focus on the Family). Come back at kickoff and let's see what nearly $3 million will get you. (Hint: 30 seconds to make your brand go viral).

You can find all the ads and commentary here tonight in real time.

Here are my favorites, in no particular order: The rest can be found here.

And a heartfelt congratulations to the New Orleans Saints for their first-ever Super Bowl trip and win. Wish I were on Bourbon!

8:28 p.m. - If I see one more advertisement for a CBS show... I'll probably keep blogging. But I'll be ticked!

8:22 p.m. - Mr. Barkley does not have a future in the music bizz.

8:14 p.m. - I know we're not at commercial, but I must say... WHO DAT.

8:10 p.m. - Hmm, not how I remembered Dante. And Budweiser Clydesdales are some of the most beautiful animals I've ever seen.

8:01 p.m. - Found the Vizio ad utterly terrifying. The Emerald nuts spot? Makes me want to lose weight — I think it's probably the Shamu association.

7:45 p.m. - Okay, screenshots of Google searches are only funny when they're inappropriate.

7:38 p.m. - Am I the only one totally creeped out by the talking e-trade babies?? I don't care if they're hilarious, they're freaky! Milka-what?

7:34 p.m. - Anyone else heard the rumor they're making another movie about the Griswolds?

7:24 p.m. - Loved the VW punch buggie commercial. Brings back fond childhood memories and fonder memories of my junior-year roadtrip to Panama City for Spring Break. Ah, what a way to pass the time.

7:14 p.m. - I know my parents don't agree, but I'm ready for some more current half-time entertainment. Also, CBS bought all of its own ad space, evidently. A final note... J.Lo is giving movies another go? Le sigh.

6:46 p.m. - I want to watch FloTV with my iPad. Can't help myself.

6:41 p.m. - Alert PETA, Polamalu abuse.

6:37 p.m - I was expecting the Dodge Charger commercial to be another installment of the Dove for men campaign. Great ad, although a questionable ultimate vehicle.

6:26 p.m. - As one who never made it onto the LOST bandwagon, I think I might've tuned in it were more like that Bud Light commercial. Logan says of the Dove for men commercial, "Wow. I think I just saw most of my friends' lives flash before my eyes."

6:22 p.m. - Whoever decided to follow up CareerBuilder's pants-less commercial with another no-pants bit should've reconsidered. So much pasty skin, so fast.

6:20 p.m. - Conan didn't get an invite to the Leno, Letterman and Winfrey shindig?

6:10 p.m. - Hi, I'm Joe Montana, and I've never worn these shoes in my life.

6:06 p.m. - Budweiser, I can always count on you. Currently playing with my host's autotune iPhone app. I'm feeling inspired. Also, kudos to Doritos for taking calling in sick to a new level.

6:03 p.m. - GoDaddy? Go away.

5:50 p.m. - And so it begins. Nothing has left a lasting impression so far, but I will say this: I love Betty White. She can do no wrong in my eyes and always such a good sport (no pun intended). Doritos? This is physical humor fail. Perhaps look to Budweiser for inspiration; they always manage to play it well.

We also saw the first of Tim Tebow's Focus on the Family ad, and I get the feeling we'll be seeing more. How many spots did they buy, I wonder?

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Movie review

Messy Frankenstein movie The Bride! stitches camp and confusion

Photo by Niko Tavernise

Christian Bale and Jessie Buckley in The Bride!.

The story of Dr. Frankenstein and his monster is now over 200 years old, with Mary Shelley’s book having been adapted or referenced in close to 500 films. Less common is the character of The Bride of Frankenstein, which existed in the original text but has more often than not been excised in adaptations. Writer/director Maggie Gyllenhaal has tried to rectify that by giving the character a big showcase in her new film, The Bride!.

Gyllenhaal has reimagined the story as one in which a woman named Ida (Jessie Buckley) becomes possessed by the spirit of Shelley (also Buckley). At the same time, the already-existing Frankenstein’s monster (Christian Bale) approaches Dr. Euphronius (Annette Bening), who specializes in reanimation, with the request to make him a wife. When Ida falls to her death in an “accident” involving her boyfriend (John Magaro), the ideal corpse becomes available.

After Ida’s resurrection, she and the monster become restless being studied by Dr. Euphronius and decide to break out to experience the world. The world, naturally, is not exactly welcoming to them, and soon the couple are on the run for causing mayhem, including a few murders. In hot pursuit are detective Jake Wiles (Peter Sarsgaard) and his assistant, Myrna Mallow (Penélope Cruz), as well as other authorities.

It’s clear that Gyllenhaal wanted to merge the Frankenstein story with Bonnie & Clyde, especially since she sets the film in the mid-1930s. And that wouldn’t have been a bad idea if having the monster and The Bride going on a crime spree was truly the focus of the movie. But most of the time there’s less intentionality in their misdeeds and more confusion, leading to a muddled plot with no clear direction or end goal in mind.

One of the biggest problems is that Gyllenhaal starts the energy of the film at an 11, giving her and everyone else nowhere to go but down. She dabbles in multiple different tones, at times going the straight drama route and other times making what seems like full-on camp. At one point, she even has the monster and the Bride in a dance sequence set to “Puttin’ on the Ritz,” which would be hilarious as an homage to Young Frankenstein if the film weren’t so disjointed.

Most baffling of all is what Gyllenhaal wants from The Bride character. She morphs multiple times over the course of the film, from close to unintelligible at the beginning to rough-and-tumble at the end. There are hints at the lack of control she has over her autonomy, including Shelley’s possession of her and the monster lying to her about her past, but any commentary that Gyllenhaal might be trying to make gets lost amid the oddity of the film as a whole.

Both Buckley and Bale are all-in for their performances, which definitely fall in the “love it or hate it” dichotomy. Each scene is pitched so high that there’s little nuance to either of them, and neither is on par with their previous Oscar-caliber roles. The high-powered supporting cast of Bening, Sarsgaard, Cruz, and Jake Gyllenhaal is watchable based on previous roles, but none of them elevate this particular movie.

Whatever intentions Maggie Gyllenhaal had in making The Bride! are only halfway legible in a film that can never find its tonal footing. There has rarely been subtlety in movies featuring Frankenstein’s monster and related characters, but this one makes all the others seem like stuffy dramas in comparison.

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The Bride! is now playing in theaters.

movies film maggie gyllenhaal annette bening christian bale jessie buckley peter sarsgaard penélope cruz movie review

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Movie review

Messy Frankenstein movie The Bride! stitches camp and confusion