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    the best of the besties

    Ken Hoffman goes head-to-head with WWE ladies Trish Stratus and Amy 'Lita' Dumas

    Ken Hoffman
    May 13, 2019 | 2:36 pm

    Trish Stratus and Amy “Lita” Dumas are best friends for sure. They’re both retired WWE superstars, both pioneers of today’s style of women’s wrestling, both successful entrepreneurs outside of the ring. Stratus inducted Lita into the WWE Hall of Fame. Lita is godmother to Stratus’ son.

    Stratus and Lita were celebrity guests at Comicpalooza in Houston on May 11. They were the featured stars of a panel discussion called “Team Besties.” I was the panel moderator. I thought my first question was a good one, to get the ball rolling.

    “What do you find in each other that makes you best friends?” Stratus looked at me, paused a moment, and said, “I’m going to let you answer that question. Why do you think we’re best friends?”

    So that’s how it’s going to be? Look, I’ve got 20 questions ready for you and Lita, you expect me to answer them for you? Isn’t this what got Lori Loughlin in trouble?

    Dog steals the show
    I knew it was going to be a bumpy ride when I introduced Lita and she brought a small tote bag with her onstage, unzipped it and out popped her dog, McKenzie, a 16-year-old Yorkie. McKenzie gave me a good sniff and a couple of licks. I got into journalism with dreams of being a serious journalist, making a difference, keeping politicians honest. Now I’m hosting a panel discussion at Comicpalooza, in front of grownups dressed like Marvel Comics characters, interviewing two women wrestlers while I’m wrestling with a Yorkie. I wanted to be Woodward and Bernstein — wound up Barnum and Bailey.

    Comicpalooza is the biggest comic book, sci-fi, anime, gaming, and pop culture event in Texas. Some 50,000 people attended over three days at the George R. Brown Convention Center. A hundred celebrities, cartoonists, voice actors, writers, astronauts, and professional video game players met their fans, posed for photos, signed autographs and held panel discussions and question-and-answer sessions. There were quidditch lessons on the third floor. The biggest draw of Comicpalooza was actress Emilia Clark, the Mother of Dragons in Game of Thrones. Not bad timing, huh?

    The “Team Bestie” panel was held in the 1,000-seat general assembly room at the George R. Brown. I met Stratus and Lita backstage and, as directed, asked them if any topic was off-limits. They said, don’t worry, if anybody or anything gets out of hand, we’ll handle it. I had no doubts about that. Stratus insisted on sitting on the far right of the panel table. Lita sat to her left. Then the dog. Then me.

    I’m a fan of Stratus and Lita. Out of respect for them and pro wrestling, I took moderating this panel discussion seriously. I wanted it to be informative and interesting, like a Sunday morning news program.

    The best of The Besties
    I asked Stratus and Lita, “We all have best friends, but generally speaking, we don’t smash their heads into a turnbuckle every night across America and around the world like you did. Did that ever get in the way of your friendship?

    Lita said, “No, we knew each other’s moves so well, we knew what to expect.”

    When you were on the road, what did you do when you were so sore you couldn’t get out of bed? Both chimed, “We got out of bed.”

    When you retired from wrestling fulltime, did you let go and eat everything that was on your no-no list?

    Stratus waved her hand, “I did! I went to McDonald’s and held my head down in my car so people wouldn’t see me.”

    I had never met Stratus or Lita, so I didn’t know what to expect. Turned out they were charming and high energy. They were funny, too. At least Lita thought it was funny when she fed dried seaweed to her dog and saw me scrunch my face. She broke off a piece and insisted that I try some. It may have been the most disgusting thing I’ve ever eaten. It was crunchy and reeked and tasted like rotten fish. (Just for the record, Senator Mitch McConnell has never made Chuck Todd eat seaweed on Meet the Press.)

    Lita is a devoted dog person. She adopted McKenzie from a shelter, and runs the animal charity Amy Dumas Operation Rescue and Education (ADORE). That impressed me so much that I tried my hardest not to gag on the seaweed. I ducked under the table so the audience didn’t see me spit it out.

    Stratus owns a yoga studio in her native Canada, where she’s a film actress, reality TV star, and commercial spokesperson. Both wore their WWE Hall of Fame rings. Stratus was inducted in 2013, Lita the following year.

    This was the first time that I’ve moderated a panel discussion. My goal was to make sure only one person spoke at a time. I can’t watch CNN anymore because the hosts, especially Chris Cuomo, let arguing guests shout each other down. It’s annoying and unproductive and unwatchable.

    Unleashing the talking stick
    So I brought my talking stick. About 10 years ago, I visited Kenya and attended a Masai village meeting. The leader held a beaded stick, a talking stick, and only the person holding it could speak. If you wanted to say something, you raised your hand, and they’d pass the talking stick to you. What a smart way to hold a meeting. I brought home a souvenir talking stick. A few months later, I told guests at Thanksgiving dinner that nobody could speak unless I passed the talking stick to them. I figured maybe that’ll shut ‘em up. You can imagine how that went over. The talking stick didn’t make it past the cheese and crackers.

    I had the talking stick in my pocket at Comicpalooza in case the audience turned into an unruly mob, yelling questions like a White House press conference. I didn’t have to worry. Stratus and Lita have done these pop culture conventions before and Lita laid down the law like a drill instructor. She had fans lined up and ready to ask questions like the Soup Nazi episode of Seinfeld.

    I need to invite Lita to my next Thanksgiving dinner.

    Trish Stratus gabs at Comicpalooza.

    Trish Stratus
      
    Photo courtesy of Comicpalooza
    Trish Stratus gabs at Comicpalooza.
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    game, set, zina.

    Best of Ken Hoffman: Interviewing Houston's greatest tennis icon

    Ken Hoffman
    Aug 29, 2024 | 12:30 pm
    Zina Garrison, tennis player
    ITATennis
    Garrison, a tennis legend, is now the tennis director of Houston Parks and Recreation.

    Editor's note: After the sudden death of beloved columnist Ken Hoffman on July 14, CultureMap is republishing some of our favorite "Hoffman's Houston" columns. In honor of the U.S. Open, here's Ken's interview with Houston tennis legend Zina Garrison; it was originally published on June 27, 2022.

    As a child, Zina Garrison learned how to hit a tennis ball on the public courts at MacGregor Park during the 1970s and became, simply, the most accomplished player ever from Houston.

    She developed into a Grand Slam champion, a Top 5 ranking in the world, Wimbledon finalist in 1990 with 20 tournament titles, Federation Cup captain, and Olympic gold medal winner and later Olympic coach.

    Now Garrison is back where she started, only this time she’s devoted to making Houston a great place to learn and play tennis … again. Like she did.

    “I am now the tennis director of Houston Parks and Recreation,” Garrison tells me. “I’m over all the public tennis programs and facilities. The job came open recently and I applied for it.”

    Wait... she’s the greatest champion this city has ever produced — and she had to apply for that job?

    “To be honest, I was more interested in the benefits than the money. As you get older, you start thinking differently,” she shares.

    Unlike the major sports leagues in America, tennis doesn’t provide any healthcare insurance or assistance once a player, even a legend, retires.

    “They’re working on it,” Garrison, 58, notes. “But as of now, nothing.”

    Garrison said her first priority as Houston’s tennis director is to repair the public courts.

    “I want to bring the public tennis facilities up to where I’d be proud, where everybody would be proud, to bring people to use our courts. There are cracks in the courts. Nothing’s really been done in the last 20 or maybe 30 years,” she says.

    “I’ve traveled to Florida and some other places and they have really nice public courts. Tennis in Houston was really thriving for a while and we had nice courts and people could play in the parks. We had junior programs. We flourished. That’s my main goal.”

    While I had Garrison on the phone, I served up some questions:

    CultureMap: Wimbledon is on. You’re familiar with that tournament, right? Who are your picks to win the men’s side and women’s side?

    Zina Garrison: Yes, I’m familiar with Wimbledon. I have my alarm set for the early morning so I can watch. I have a weird pick, a more personal pick, for the men.

    I would love to see Rafael Nadal keep going on, but it’s going to be tough for him. The guy from Italy, Matteo Berrettini, I watched him play a couple of weeks ago and I think he’s going to surprise a lot of people. And I am absolutely in love with that little guy, Carlos Alcaraz, from Spain. He’s made me watch tennis again.

    On the women’s side, I don’t think it will be Iga Swiatek. I think it’s just too hard to keep a streak like hers (35 matches in a row including the French Open title) going in today’s game. It’s really wide open. I don’t really have a pick, it’s just who comes in and plays well at the right time.

    CM: What do you think about Natela Dzalamidze, the doubles player from Russian who switched her nationality to Georgia so she could play Wimbledon, which has banned players from Russian and Belarus this year?

    ZG: I don’t like that she was able to do that. I was just on the phone with (former pro turned broadcaster) Chanda Rubin talking about what’s going on in tennis these days.

    First of all, there is the human rights stuff that’s going on in Russia and Ukraine. We have to start forcing accountability for actions. A lot of people didn’t agree with what Wimbledon did, but I think they had to take a stand.

    CM: The women’s GOAT is easy — it’s Serena. But who do you think is the men’s GOAT?

    ZG: Wow, that’s a hard one. If you had asked me earlier this year, I would have said Roger Federer because of everything he’s accomplished. But right now I’m going to have to go with Nadal. Nadal has taken tennis to a whole ‘nother level, of getting people to watch, coming out of the pandemic, where he has matches and you think he can’t come back and he’s still grinding no matter what.

    For me, he is the epitome of what we need in this world right now: Never give up but not be selfish about helping others. I know it sounds clichéd, but that’s what I’m going through right now.

    CM: When I first met you, you were painfully shy. It was hard to get an answer out of you. Now you’re a TV commentator and a regular chatterbox. What happened?

    ZG: I was an introvert but I had always been intrigued by people of wisdom. A lot of it came as I developed confidence in myself. I had always been told at a very young age, if you really knew me, I spoke a lot. If you didn’t know me, I would be quiet. I would only speak about things that I was extremely passionate about.

    As I’ve gotten older, because of my experiences. I feel like I can help people so I’m not afraid to say what I want to say.

    CM: Starting the week after Wimbledon, coaches will be allowed to communicate with men players during matches. Up to now, that’s only been allowed in the women’s game. Every other sport allows coaching. Do you think tennis should allow coaching, too?

    ZG: I don’t think coaching should be allowed. That’s one of the great things about tennis. That’s a part of the sport, that you grow and figure things out. You learn to think for yourself.

    There’s always been little signals from coaches, but now you have these full blown conversations. Another bad thing about allowing coaching is it gives the players the opportunity to blame a loss their coach. That’s not good for the sport.

    CM: You were known for wiggling your butt when receiving serve. Did you know you were doing it? Did you do that on purpose?

    ZG: It started off as kind of a joke with my coaches. They said, we need you to move your feet. I said, you mean like this?

    So, it started as a joke but I realized that it helped get my feet moving: Okay, I’m going to keep doing this.

    I’ll never forget that year after I got to the Wimbledon finals, 1990, I went over to Japan and there were 1,200 people there … and all of them started wiggling!

    CM: What was the first extravagant thing you bought for yourself when the tennis prize money started rolling in?

    ZG: It was 1982, and I bought a candy apple red Volkswagen convertible with a white top.

    CM: You were on the Biggest Loser, the show where contestants compete against each other to lose weight. Let’s just say you didn’t win. Are you happy you went on that show, or do you regret it?

    ZG: I was one of the first who had to leave the competition. (No, you were THE first.) It was an experience, but I probably shouldn’t have done it. I think I regret going on there. It wasn’t what I thought it was.

    It was reality TV and at the time I didn’t know what reality TV was .I was more ready to get out of there than anything else.

    CM: Now here’s the big question, Zina. For years, I’ve had a running disagreement with ESPN 97.5 FM morning host John Granato about which is a more demanding, tougher sport – golf or tennis?

    Granato says it’s golf, because the tournament winner has to beat every other player that week, while in tennis the winner just has to beat seven players at most. And, each week, golfers have to contend with a different course.

    But, I say it’s tennis because players have to be in top physical condition, while nearly anyone in any shape can win a golf major.

    Plus, in golf, players have a caddy helping them make decisions. In tennis, players are on their own.

    In golf, you can have a bad day on Thursday and still win the tournament. In tennis, if you have a bad day in the opening round, you’re on a plane out of there.

    In golf, it’s the player against the course. There’s no defense in golf. In tennis, there’s a human opponent trying to beat you.

    In golf, the ball is lying still. In tennis the ball is coming at you at 140 mph.

    So which is the tougher sport, golf or tennis? I’m right ... right?

    ZG: Are you serious? Who is this guy who says golf is harder? The answer is tennis and it’s not even close.

    You’re playing against someone. You’re only controlling the ball when it’s on your side of the net. You can’t control what the other player is doing. It’s almost like a boxer coming at you.

    You have to have both the physical and mental capacity to win. In golf, if you have a bad day, it’s because you’re having that bad day. There’s no opponent competing with you. So, I’m saying it’s tennis.

    CM (note to John Granato): I win. Granted, it might have been the way I asked the question. Also, Garrison is a former tennis pro.

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