An electrical appliance sent a current through my body and shocked me this week. And even that was nothing compared to some of the things you want me to solve.

But it does explain why I'm a little long-winded this week. At least, that's what I'm telling myself. And you.

Dear Fayza,

I've been pulling back lately from a group that I've hung out with because one of the girls is absolutely horrible. Catty, brash, inconsiderate — and it's always about her. Shows up late, talks the loudest, gets the drunkest .. .always. We will call her the Queen Bee.

I recently decided to venture out with the group (because I like the other girls), and it was awful. At damn near 30, it was like I was in "Mean Girls!" Everyone had their inside jokes and when I'd try to chime in, the room would go silent. There was actually a point where Queen Bee was making faces as I was talking. Nice. Did I miss the memo of having to pass through high school again before reaching 3-0?

Question is, how do I cut ties with this group? I don't want to make it a big deal, but I just can't deal with the cattiness anymore! I really like a couple of girls, but seriously, I can't be around Queen Bee any longer.

I'm not about choosing sides (as that is quite high school, too), so how do I hang out with some without telling them why I don't come around anymore?

- Too Old For This

Dear Too Old For This,

Your choice of social situations is questionable, but you did make one commendable election here — your moniker. Yes, dear, by your 30s, you should absolutely be above needing a leader for your pack.

Is this hen house your only connection to the animal farm? I doubt it. You're a strong, independent woman. You have strong, independent interests. Simply put, you have your own thing. Pursue it.

At almost 30, you have your own transportation, your own bank account and your own schedule. The time you've wasted under the judgmental eye of this manipulative martini monster could've been spent pursuing social activities you actually enjoy.

Such as, you know, being yourself.

So find them and do them. And when the girls ask, "Wanna have drinks with us tonight?" you won't even need to raise the confrontational cowardice flag — you'll be legitimately busy with your new! fabulous! life!

Case closed.

Yeah right. You didn't honestly think it was that easy, did you?

Because although you've expressed an interest in cutting ties with the group, what you really want is to cut ties with the group dynamic.

First things first. Grab your hoe, and reap what you sow, woman. Cultivate your one-on-one relationships with the sovereign's vassals. A boozy brunch, a mani/pedi afternoon, sinful shopping — pick your female-heavy poison.

Establish your relationship with her — when you're with her, you're with her only. Not the group, not your demons, but each individual little bee only.

And when the conversation inevitably turns to the group (and your noticeable absence from it), keep the bad-mouthing in the shadows.

Because she will ask, and you — until you trust her as an independently-owned friend — will not indulge the catty gossipmongering. No. You. Will. Not.

You and the high road are about to become the best of friends, while you bow out of the group gracefully and strengthen your bonds individually.

Rest assured, however, that there's a part two. Because this isn't the cleanest end to your tenure on the queen's court. You, blatantly skirting the queen and her group to befriend the ladies-in-waiting? Oh, honey. They will talk.

Walk with me out on this limb, my social ingenue.

Before you retreat, why don't you invest a little effort in tearing down the Queen Bee's groupthink facade? What if the quality time you're spending with her minions spilled over into the lap of the high priestess herself?

Because if you think the public face is the only side of Queen Bee — or even the best side — then that should tell you something about how well you get to know someone in a group setting.

A generous helping of honey can counter her massive vinegar dosage — one on one. Why not try offing her head with kindness mano-a-mano? If she guillotines you, at least you gave every effort at an alliance with this woman. And your nest will be clear of eggs when the hens do come a-cluckin'.

You were initially friends for a reason, right? You owe it to you both to test your footing to see if there's any common ground left on which you can both stand — before you commit treason upon the kingdom.

Who rules the roost? Only the one to whom you give the scepter. Not only is the time ripe for a regime change, but an overthrow of the monarchy is just what maturity ordered.

What — or who — is making your life a living hell? Send an e-mail to advice@culturemap.com, leave a question in the comments or send a message to me on Facebook or Twitter. I won't maliciously feed Kalteen bars to anyone, but I do know a few good trust fall exercises.