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    RodeoHouston 2018

    Ken Hoffman chows down on Rodeo Carnival's 9 best dishes

    Ken Hoffman
    Mar 5, 2018 | 2:32 pm

    To you, and millions of visitors to the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo, a corn dog is a corn dog — a yummy treat along the Carnival Midway. So simple, yet so elegant. A juicy frank covered with golden cornbread batter on a stick.

    Chomp, chomp, chomp — okay, maybe four bites if you’re on crumb alert — what could taste more delicious during rodeo week?

    But to Dominic Palmieri, the “Midway Gourmet,” a corn dog is his passion, his quest for perfection on a stick. Palmieri obsesses over all the food goodies for Ray Cammack Shows, which operates all the concessions and rides at the carnival. He is an artist, and the deep-fryer is his canvas.

    “Let’s take the Big Daddy corn dog: it took me three years and just short of 100 attempts to come up with the perfect corn dog batter,” he says. “I had to find the right recipe that wouldn’t hold oil in the finished product, that had just the right crunch, that fries up an aesthetically pleasing corn dog.”

    The maestro continues: “We use Holmes sausage, which is a very popular local brand. We use a stick that is longer than average in corn dogs. The right oil is critical to a corn dog. If it smokes at high temperature, we can’t use it. If the batter is too sweet, it will fry up dark and won’t look pleasing to the customer. Some batter wouldn’t stay crispy long enough for the customer’s last bite. Some batter would hold too much oil and taste greasy. If the baking soda isn’t just right, it could get too puffy and blow the batter off the dog. There’s a lot of science that goes into a corn dog.”

    Finding the perfect batter recipe isn’t the end of the corn dog road. Palmieri has to make sure he can make it in 25-gallon batches, and procure the ingredients in large quantities at the right price — and get them delivered fast on the road.

    In my annual rite of Rodeo, Palmieri takes me around the Carnival’s “restaurant row” to try all his new items — and more. I’m not passing up a traditional funnel cake. I’m weak.

    This time, I bring along a new crew of “taste testers.” My former allies in gross consumption have gone off to college. Deep-fried Twinkie fans...they grow up so fast. I recruit ESPN 97.5 FM talk host Raheel Ramzanali and Gow Media V.P of Digital Products (I have no idea what that means) Brandon Strange, who doubles as our photographer.

    They don’t let me down. They put on an eating display that stuns the locals: Carnival workers are taking photos of them.

    “We have several new items on the midway this year,” Palmieri says. “We have a deep-fried cannoli, a Flamin’ Hot Cheetos caramel apple, a Flamin’ Hot Cheetos Big Daddy corn dog covered with cheddar cheese, and a spicy turkey leg. The spicy turkey leg won for ‘Best Traditional Fair Food’ at the Gold Buckle Foodie Awards this year. It’s the first time we’ve had the spicy turkey leg here in Houston,” Palmieri says.

    The Carnival will sell 11 truckloads of turkey legs at the Houston Livestock Show and Rodeo this year. I asked how many turkey legs are in a truckload. He said, “A lot.”

    That’s the thing about the rodeo — there’s no shortage of comedians around here.

    This rodeo is Flamin’
    Palmieri says last year’s big hit new item — ears of corn covered in Flamin’ Hot Cheetos — is back. He will use one-and-a-half truckloads of Cheetos, and three fields of corn to cover this year’s event. (I didn't ask how much that was.)

    “The hot trend this year is spicy food. Flamin’ Hot Cheetos were so popular last year that we had to get a machine that does nothing but crunch Cheetos. Bacon, surprisingly, is trending down. Bacon had a good five or six-year run, but people seem to be going for our spicy items now,” Palmieri says.

    Then Palmieri drops a bombshell — the kind of blockbuster scoop that hard-hitting investigative reporters like myself live for:

    Greatest fries...ever?
    “We just, and I mean only a half-hour ago, tested something that we’re going to debut at the San Diego fair later this year,” Palmieri says. “You ready? It’s Salted Caramel Fries!”

    Ramzanali and Strange have to pick me up off the floor.

    He’s talking French fries smothered in warm salted caramel sauce.

    “The inspiration was watching young people at a burger place dip their fries in a chocolate shake. We thought we can improve on that. This is a competitive game. Every year, no matter how good we think we are, we have to up our game. Customers expect it. We’re always trying to raise the bar. If we want to stay the same, at the top of our industry, we have to continually change, that’s the quest we strive for. So get ready for Salted Caramel Fries!” Palmieri says.

    If only Palmieri would use his genius for good instead of evil, the world would be a better place.

    How do Ramzanali and Strange do on their rookie laps of the Carnival food booths?

    “By far the best thing I ate was the fried butter,” Raheel says. “I heard about the legendary fried butter, but had no idea it was such a game changer. The best way to describe the fried butter is the most amazing Belgium waffle you’ve ever had. I know people would love to enjoy a chef's menu with world famous masters, but to me, nothing will top my Rodeo food graze.”

    Strange exults, “The most surprising item was the Flamin’ Hot Cheetos caramel apple. The combination of flavor and texture was incredible.”

    ---

    What’s your favorite Carnival food? Let Ken know in the comments, or on Twitter.

    A massive mound of fajita fries.

    Rodeo Carnival girl with fajita fries
      
    Photo by Brandon Strange
    A massive mound of fajita fries.
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    game, set, zina.

    Best of Ken Hoffman: Interviewing Houston's greatest tennis icon

    Ken Hoffman
    Aug 29, 2024 | 12:30 pm
    Zina Garrison, tennis player
    ITATennis
    Garrison, a tennis legend, is now the tennis director of Houston Parks and Recreation.

    Editor's note: After the sudden death of beloved columnist Ken Hoffman on July 14, CultureMap is republishing some of our favorite "Hoffman's Houston" columns. In honor of the U.S. Open, here's Ken's interview with Houston tennis legend Zina Garrison; it was originally published on June 27, 2022.

    As a child, Zina Garrison learned how to hit a tennis ball on the public courts at MacGregor Park during the 1970s and became, simply, the most accomplished player ever from Houston.

    She developed into a Grand Slam champion, a Top 5 ranking in the world, Wimbledon finalist in 1990 with 20 tournament titles, Federation Cup captain, and Olympic gold medal winner and later Olympic coach.

    Now Garrison is back where she started, only this time she’s devoted to making Houston a great place to learn and play tennis … again. Like she did.

    “I am now the tennis director of Houston Parks and Recreation,” Garrison tells me. “I’m over all the public tennis programs and facilities. The job came open recently and I applied for it.”

    Wait... she’s the greatest champion this city has ever produced — and she had to apply for that job?

    “To be honest, I was more interested in the benefits than the money. As you get older, you start thinking differently,” she shares.

    Unlike the major sports leagues in America, tennis doesn’t provide any healthcare insurance or assistance once a player, even a legend, retires.

    “They’re working on it,” Garrison, 58, notes. “But as of now, nothing.”

    Garrison said her first priority as Houston’s tennis director is to repair the public courts.

    “I want to bring the public tennis facilities up to where I’d be proud, where everybody would be proud, to bring people to use our courts. There are cracks in the courts. Nothing’s really been done in the last 20 or maybe 30 years,” she says.

    “I’ve traveled to Florida and some other places and they have really nice public courts. Tennis in Houston was really thriving for a while and we had nice courts and people could play in the parks. We had junior programs. We flourished. That’s my main goal.”

    While I had Garrison on the phone, I served up some questions:

    CultureMap: Wimbledon is on. You’re familiar with that tournament, right? Who are your picks to win the men’s side and women’s side?

    Zina Garrison: Yes, I’m familiar with Wimbledon. I have my alarm set for the early morning so I can watch. I have a weird pick, a more personal pick, for the men.

    I would love to see Rafael Nadal keep going on, but it’s going to be tough for him. The guy from Italy, Matteo Berrettini, I watched him play a couple of weeks ago and I think he’s going to surprise a lot of people. And I am absolutely in love with that little guy, Carlos Alcaraz, from Spain. He’s made me watch tennis again.

    On the women’s side, I don’t think it will be Iga Swiatek. I think it’s just too hard to keep a streak like hers (35 matches in a row including the French Open title) going in today’s game. It’s really wide open. I don’t really have a pick, it’s just who comes in and plays well at the right time.

    CM: What do you think about Natela Dzalamidze, the doubles player from Russian who switched her nationality to Georgia so she could play Wimbledon, which has banned players from Russian and Belarus this year?

    ZG: I don’t like that she was able to do that. I was just on the phone with (former pro turned broadcaster) Chanda Rubin talking about what’s going on in tennis these days.

    First of all, there is the human rights stuff that’s going on in Russia and Ukraine. We have to start forcing accountability for actions. A lot of people didn’t agree with what Wimbledon did, but I think they had to take a stand.

    CM: The women’s GOAT is easy — it’s Serena. But who do you think is the men’s GOAT?

    ZG: Wow, that’s a hard one. If you had asked me earlier this year, I would have said Roger Federer because of everything he’s accomplished. But right now I’m going to have to go with Nadal. Nadal has taken tennis to a whole ‘nother level, of getting people to watch, coming out of the pandemic, where he has matches and you think he can’t come back and he’s still grinding no matter what.

    For me, he is the epitome of what we need in this world right now: Never give up but not be selfish about helping others. I know it sounds clichéd, but that’s what I’m going through right now.

    CM: When I first met you, you were painfully shy. It was hard to get an answer out of you. Now you’re a TV commentator and a regular chatterbox. What happened?

    ZG: I was an introvert but I had always been intrigued by people of wisdom. A lot of it came as I developed confidence in myself. I had always been told at a very young age, if you really knew me, I spoke a lot. If you didn’t know me, I would be quiet. I would only speak about things that I was extremely passionate about.

    As I’ve gotten older, because of my experiences. I feel like I can help people so I’m not afraid to say what I want to say.

    CM: Starting the week after Wimbledon, coaches will be allowed to communicate with men players during matches. Up to now, that’s only been allowed in the women’s game. Every other sport allows coaching. Do you think tennis should allow coaching, too?

    ZG: I don’t think coaching should be allowed. That’s one of the great things about tennis. That’s a part of the sport, that you grow and figure things out. You learn to think for yourself.

    There’s always been little signals from coaches, but now you have these full blown conversations. Another bad thing about allowing coaching is it gives the players the opportunity to blame a loss their coach. That’s not good for the sport.

    CM: You were known for wiggling your butt when receiving serve. Did you know you were doing it? Did you do that on purpose?

    ZG: It started off as kind of a joke with my coaches. They said, we need you to move your feet. I said, you mean like this?

    So, it started as a joke but I realized that it helped get my feet moving: Okay, I’m going to keep doing this.

    I’ll never forget that year after I got to the Wimbledon finals, 1990, I went over to Japan and there were 1,200 people there … and all of them started wiggling!

    CM: What was the first extravagant thing you bought for yourself when the tennis prize money started rolling in?

    ZG: It was 1982, and I bought a candy apple red Volkswagen convertible with a white top.

    CM: You were on the Biggest Loser, the show where contestants compete against each other to lose weight. Let’s just say you didn’t win. Are you happy you went on that show, or do you regret it?

    ZG: I was one of the first who had to leave the competition. (No, you were THE first.) It was an experience, but I probably shouldn’t have done it. I think I regret going on there. It wasn’t what I thought it was.

    It was reality TV and at the time I didn’t know what reality TV was .I was more ready to get out of there than anything else.

    CM: Now here’s the big question, Zina. For years, I’ve had a running disagreement with ESPN 97.5 FM morning host John Granato about which is a more demanding, tougher sport – golf or tennis?

    Granato says it’s golf, because the tournament winner has to beat every other player that week, while in tennis the winner just has to beat seven players at most. And, each week, golfers have to contend with a different course.

    But, I say it’s tennis because players have to be in top physical condition, while nearly anyone in any shape can win a golf major.

    Plus, in golf, players have a caddy helping them make decisions. In tennis, players are on their own.

    In golf, you can have a bad day on Thursday and still win the tournament. In tennis, if you have a bad day in the opening round, you’re on a plane out of there.

    In golf, it’s the player against the course. There’s no defense in golf. In tennis, there’s a human opponent trying to beat you.

    In golf, the ball is lying still. In tennis the ball is coming at you at 140 mph.

    So which is the tougher sport, golf or tennis? I’m right ... right?

    ZG: Are you serious? Who is this guy who says golf is harder? The answer is tennis and it’s not even close.

    You’re playing against someone. You’re only controlling the ball when it’s on your side of the net. You can’t control what the other player is doing. It’s almost like a boxer coming at you.

    You have to have both the physical and mental capacity to win. In golf, if you have a bad day, it’s because you’re having that bad day. There’s no opponent competing with you. So, I’m saying it’s tennis.

    CM (note to John Granato): I win. Granted, it might have been the way I asked the question. Also, Garrison is a former tennis pro.

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