Why I don't mind x-ray vision

Loving the new sexy airport body scanners: Yes, I will (virtually) undress

Someone has to appreciate how much I've been killing myself in the trianglepose.
Sexy!
Put the perviness of peeping toms to use behind the TSA scanners.
Yeah, he was fun to flirt with when I was in high school. I've moved on to adifferent sector.

Our new CulturePoll asks readers their opinion on the Transportation Security Administration's (TSA) full-body scanners, which reveal detailed images of travelers’ bodies. Although some call the new scanning method "gross," "invasive," and even "grossly invasive," I welcome the virtual strip search.

Am I of the “I’ve got nothing to hide!” mindset?

Do I believe that any measure preventing terrorism is worth the sacrifice? No and no. My reasons have nothing to do with civil liberties or terrorism. (Those sound boring anyway.)

Here's why I'm for sexy TSA scans and why you should be too:

1. Someone has to appreciate the work I put into this body, even if it’s a stranger behind a scanner. I didn’t buy that yoga group-on for nothing.

2. Flirting with flight attendants? Over it. (Besides, ever since the Continental and United merger they've been so moody!)

I yearn to eye-sex a more exotic group of airport employees. TSA full-body scans present untapped avenues of flirtation: bizarre undies, feigning being transgender, glowing nipple rings, etc. Careful though— you gotta watch out for the pervs.

3. But these pervs need jobs too. Stationing pervs behind the sexy scanners ensures that they stay gainfully employed. You know their eager stares won’t let anything slip by.

4. Pervs in the workforce mean pervs will have less time to rappel down apartment complexes, peeping in windows and being all pervy. Although it’s thrilling the first few times you’re perved on, much like flirting with flight attendants, the experience gets real old real fast.

5. Imagine how bored the poor workers get listening to metal detectors and doing pat downs. Don’t you feel bad for them? Show some sympathy.

Say yes to (virtually) undressing for the sexy new TSA scans.

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A Toast to William Chris

Texas vineyard makes World’s Best list for third year in a row

Photo courtesy of William Chris Vineyards

William Chris Vineyards has done it again.

One of Texas' best vineyards has much more than the Lone Star State under its spell. William Chris Vineyards, located in Hye (out in the Hill Country) has been named the No. 63 best on the planet by World's Best Vineyards. This is its third year in a row on the list; in 2023, it was No. 60.

Despite a slight drop in the rankings, this is still a huge accomplishment. There are more than 100 wineries in the Hill Country, and William Chris was the only one to make the 51-100 list. It was one of two United States vineyards, the other being Brooks Wine in Oregon.

The top 50 vineyards will be announced on November 4, but if last year's winners and William Chris' ongoing regional dominance are any indication, Texas likely won't see any more wins. The list is compiled through the votes of nearly 500 wine and travel experts around the world, who make up the World’s Best Vineyards Academy.

The passage describing William Chris on the 51-100 list mentions the wines, the food, and also the general charm of the Hill Country:

"[...]William Chris uses minimal intervention to produce wines true to their origins from a luxurious winery near vinous hub, Fredericksburg, where you can expect a warm welcome and regular live music. Whilst overlooking the vineyards, a 'Winemaker’s Tasting’ introduces you to the range, which uses grapes you might expect for the climate like Grenache, Syrah, Cabernet Sauvignon and some wonderfully deep Mourvèdre, along with those you might not, like a zesty white Picpoul and a newly developed sweet wine from Muscat and Malvasia. Add sustenance in the form of paired dishes with a ‘Vineyard Table Experience’ or at one of the weekly supper clubs, with picnics provided if you’re keen to explore [the] Texas Hill Country[...]"

It also names Enchante, which William Chris calls its "flagship," as the vineyard's signature wine. The only Enchante vintage still available on the winery's online store is 2021. The Bordeaux-style blend from that year is "brooding, wild, and sexy," the listing says, and includes notes of blackberry jam, eucalyptus, flaky pastry, creek bed, and more. "The palate is dry and gripping, with well-integrated oak on an almost full body," it concludes.

In addition to the regularly scheduled tastings, which can be booked by individual parties, William Chris is always hosting larger events that curious visitors can swing by. Most common are live music performances, but the vineyard also hosts seasonal events like the annual grape punch (like stomping, but with hands) and participates in regional initiatives like the Texas Wine Month passport. Some events are members-only; the Hye Society Wine Club is currently closed to new members, but a waitlist gives an opportunity for new people to join as others leave.

The 51-100 list is available at worldsbestvineyards.com. More information about the top 50 announcement is available here. William Chris Vineyards is located at 10352 US-290, Hye, Texas.

wine wineries vineyards william chris vineyards hill country lists awards