The texting bride has nothing on the Bayou Driver: Why America can't put thephone down
We know you love your text messaging, America. We know that it's your lifeline to the virtual world when the real one often proves mundane, monotonous, and . . . well, way too real.
But don't you think you could break — brake? — before you text yourself into the bayou?
Apparently one Houston driver wasn't able to honor that simple request. On Sunday, a man heading east on US-290 exited the freeway — and kept right on rolling. He ended up at the bottom of the bayou around the Brickhouse Gully, but managed to scrape his way to the surface without more than a few bumps and bruises.
Authorities suspect that he was — you guessed it — texting and driving.
Yeah, that's pretty bad.
But you know what might be worse? Texting and vowing.
As in the matrimony-type vows. Because even on her wedding day, while clutching her father's hand and listening to the preacher explain the sanctity of her undertaking, a California bride simply couldn't resist the urge to . . . update her Facebook status? Tell her best friend she was getting "sooooooo wasted" after this old man stopped his yapping?
You're obsessed, America. And if these ridiculous situations don't put a glaring spotlight on your own text-heavy behavior, we're not sure what will.