Lifting the curtain

Peek inside Houston's River Oaks Theatre ahead of its grand reopening

After several years of will-they-won’t-they, Houston's iconic River Oaks Theatre will officially open on Thursday, October 3.

An opening-night screening of Joker: Folie a Deux has already sold out. (Another screening at 10:30 pm still has tickets available, as of press time.) According to a release, the first 800 people who show up on opening night will receive a commemorative gold coin, a throwback to the old days of early 20th-century movie palaces.

“In the early 1900s, movie theaters used to give out a gift of gold to the very first guests who would walk through the building,” says River Oaks Theatre artistic director Robert Saucedo. “And the tradition was that this gift would give the theater prosperity and luck for years to come. And, so, we wanted to take that and do a little twist on it.”

Located at 2009 West Gray, the River Oaks Theatre is Houston’s longest-running cinema. Opening in 1939, it was last managed by the Landmark company as an arthouse theater. It closed in 2021 and was threatened with demolition until Culinary Khancepts purchased the lease in 2022. The company also operates Star Cinema Grill, State Fare, and Liberty Kitchen. It will open Leo's River Oaks, a fine dining steakhouse, next to the theater.

River Oaks Theatre marquee After a two-year restoration, the River Oaks Theatre is ready to make its grand debut.Photo courtesy of River Oaks Theatre

The River Oaks will reopen with three refurbished theaters, updated lighting and seating, and other amenities. Not only will it continue to show movies, but also host live shows, music, comedians, and other performances as a community hub.

Thanks to a two-year, multi-million dollar restoration, the River Oaks returns architecturally to its 1939 Art Deco roots, but with luxurious modern upgrades. Key historical elements, including the iconic marquee, terrazzo flooring, and statues that grace the main auditorium, have been preserved.

Photo by Jason Ostrow

The River Oaks' main auditorium now has plush recliner seats.

"The team worked meticulously to maintain the venue’s vintage charm while enhancing the overall aesthetic with bold geometric patterns, opulent materials, and modern conveniences," the release says.

Now, plush seats with personal dining tables cover the main auditorium and two auditoriums upstairs. The main auditorium now seats 237 guests and is equipped with a state-of-the-art Barco laser projector, a custom Danley sound system, and full live theatrical lighting and sound systems powered by Q-Sys. Upstairs, the twin auditoriums seat 50 guests each, while a newly added Private Theatre Lounge accommodates 20 guests.

Lavish bars sit on both floors, ready to serve audiences wine, beer, and movie-inspired cocktails. As for food, chef Tim Reading of the forthcoming Leo’s River Oaks has created an elevated menu featuring dishes like Free Range Popcorn Chicken, Veal and Pork Fried Meatballs, The Lobster Roll, Ora King Salmon Grain Bowl, the Luv Ya Blu Burger, Tarte Au Chocolate, and Strawberry Mascarpone Cheesecake. All will be available to order via QR code on each dining table, and food can be delivered to seats.

River Oaks Theatre bar The lavish new upstairs bar.Photo by Jack Opatrny

Along with screening first-run theatrical films — especially art-house cinema that the theater was already known for — River Oaks will have repertory film programs that will play everything from beloved popcorn flicks to cult classics. And, of course, The Royal Mystic Order of CHAOS will be back to host monthly midnight-movie screenings of The Rocky Horror Picture Show. But River Oaks will also include live music and comedy events on its main stage.

River Oaks started getting film lovers hyped for the opening by holding invitation-only screenings of such films as Star Wars: Episode IV, Urban Cowboy, The Goonies, and The Royal Tenenbaums.

Regular moviegoers will be glad to know the theater will soon be launching the "Cinema Savant" subscription program, providing unlimited access to films for just $20 per month.

Even though the owners say they still have some work to do to fine-tune the theater, the River Oaks is ready to get back in the movie-showing business.

“The good thing about us is we put a lot of heart and soul into this business,” says Culinary Khancepts vice president Jason Ostrow. “We’re local business owners. It’s not like we’re some big company out of New York or LA — we’re here. So we take a lot of pride in what we do. So we won’t stop kind of tweaking and playing with it until it’s exactly what it needs to be. But, at some point, you've got to open.”

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Movie Review

New comedy I Want Your Sex saddles an all-star cast with a dull story

Photo courtesy of Magnolia Pictures

Cooper Hoffman and Olivia Wilde in I Want Your Sex.

Writer/director Gregg Araki has been making provocative movies for nearly 40 years, releasing his debut — Three Bewildered People in the Night — in 1987. Most of them have had plotlines that revolved around sex in one way or another, and for his latest — his first film in 12 years — he’s putting it right there in the title, I Want Your Sex.

Elliot (Cooper Hoffman) is an aimless twenty-something who can’t even afford the rent for his apartment with best friend, Apple (Chase Sui Wonders). Thankfully, he finds a job at the gallery of artist Erika Tracy (Olivia Wilde), who is open with her sexuality both in her artwork and in her day-to-day life. That soon includes Elliot, whom she convinces to enter into a dominant-submissive relationship with her, with sessions taking place both at work and her home.

Elliot, who’s in a going-nowhere coupling with Minerva (Charli XCX), is more than willing to participate, both because it lets him feel something he doesn’t get normally and because Erika offers a perspective on sex that’s much different from people of his generation. But as he gets in deeper with her, he starts to lose a sense of himself, going down a path in which he finds himself talking to police detectives Zem (Johnny Knoxville) and Zola (Margaret Cho).

Araki does his level best to make I Want Your Sex into a broad comedy, and early on it seems as if he might succeed. The deadpan way that sexual objects appear in the film (a penis-shaped rug in Elliot and Apple’s apartment, a vagina artwork with chewed gum as the medium) make for amusing sight gags. He also makes Elliot the bewildered other in multiple twosomes, with Minerva being the funniest, as she’s way more interested in studying than his ham-fisted attempts at sex.

It’s clear that Araki wants the film to be a commentary on the generational differences about sex, but he fumbles his own idea. It starts with an on-the-nose conversation between Erika and Elliot, and continues with the various dalliances, which seem to be more about making Elliot look and feel ridiculous than giving true insight. Their encounters certainly open his mind about what sex can be, but their one-note nature makes them repetitive and frankly boring, odd considering the acts in which the two engage.

The uninspired storytelling makes the 90-minute film drag way more than it should. Araki includes a few other characters to try to vary the tone of the film, including gallery workers Zap (Mason Gooding) and Vikktor (Daveed Diggs), but their early promise yields little results. The framing device of Elliot’s interview with the detectives never works, especially because Araki completely neuters the personalities of Cho and Knoxville for seemingly no good reason.

The cast as a whole goes to waste. Hoffman is showing the promise of his late father (Philip Seymour Hoffman), and even though he’s appealing here, the material pulls him down. Wilde just made her own provocative movie about sex (The Invite), and this one pales in comparison despite her heightened performance. Wonders, Charli XCX, and Gooding are all young stars who deserve to be showcased much better than they are in this film.

A film called I Want Your Sex is announcing itself as daring and alluring, but this film contains almost none of those qualities. Instead, it’s a slog that only occasionally has something interesting to show or say, mostly relying on the power of its actors to hold viewers’ attention — and failing at even that.

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I Want Your Sex is now playing in select theaters.

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