Recall Me Not
Steve Jobs is no Oprah: His free "bumper" gift comes up lacking as an iPhone 4fix
- Steve Jobs came out of the shadows, but he'll never be confused with ...
- Oprah, who gives away cars.
- While Jobs gives away cases for his Consumer Reports panned iPhone4.
Move over, Kim Jong-il. There's a new villain in town. He's just as diabolical, he rules a nation of semi-willing drones, and he is, perhaps, a smidge more delusional.
He goes by Jobs. Steve Jobs.
For the three million faithful holding their collective breath for an Apple redemption of the iPhone 4's shoddy reception issues, their 22-day wait to exhale came to an end this afternoon around 11:30 a.m. PST.
And guess what?
EVERYBODY'S GETTING A FREE BUMPER!
Wait. What the...?
That's right, folks. Not only has Jobs determined that no smartphone is perfect, but the Blackberry Bold 9700, the HTC Droid Eris, and the Samsung Omnia 2 are just as incompetent as the iPhone 4 when it comes to choking the antenna. SO THERE.
While Jobs openly admitted that Apple "screwed up the algorithm" for accurate indications of signal strength, he's not-so-secretly just keeping up with the Joneses. And proud of it.
What's more, Jobs went on to blame the anorexic market for cases — affectionally known as "bumpers" — at the iPhone 4's release. And because, according to Jobs, "We love our customers and we want to take care of them," EVERYBODY'S GETTING A FREE BUMPER! Next week. Until September 30th.
Sigh. We liked yesterday's proposed recall option better.
Just like Kim Jong-il's oppressed society, it looks like we're stuck taking Steve Jobs' scraps yet again. And washing them down with non-potable water.
Who's feeling the love now?