Bar Hoppin'

How I worked out my inner Shakira

I suddenly felt like Shakira, my honest hips shaking in time to the music.
Photo by Mert Alas & Marcus Piggott
Tennies are now my regular footwear.
I rediscovered my abs at Zumba class.

There’s a scene in Sweet Home Alabama where Reese Witherspoon runs into a childhood friend at the local watering hole. Witherspoon’s character Melanie Smooter greets the friend, who just happens to have a baby on her hip.

“You have a baby…in a bar,” Smooter says with a certain judgy tone.

That’s kind of the initial feeling I get when showing up to clubs and lounges in yoga pants and tennis shoes to work out…in a bar. Fortunately, once the music starts and the lights go down, it’s easy to forget where you are.

I headed to Shotzkies for TropaZumba, led by Jerry Maese, whose fun and sultry moves have led to a lot of bodies that are as hot as the Latin-themed music he plays. The Wednesday night I went, the doors to the Texas-style bar were wide open and 15 people (mainly women) were inside in workout clothes and tennis shoes. Most of the group was in good shape, but not intimidating for those of us who are ahem, fluffier, in places.

Maese and his team lead the class, slowly introducing the basic sequences and steps, repeating them up to three times before speeding it up. We went from Latin music to Bollywood tunes with moves meant to burn calories and work the core, and halfway through I caught on to the steps and suddenly felt like Shakira, my honest hips shaking in time to the music. Oddly enough, the best part of the class was the standing ab work that hurt so good, I actually remembered I have abs. Maese and his crew teach Zumba Monday through Saturday at Shotzkies and Dancing City, with various membership packages available. The first class is free and pop-in classes are $15 each. Classes at Shotzkies are Mondays and Wednesdays at 6:30 and Saturday at 10 a.m. 4701A Nett St.

NightClub Cardio holds its classes Tuesday nights at Pravada on South Shepherd, a lounge I’ve visited in high heels and I gotta say, going in workout gear is a lot more comfortable. The floor fills up quickly with people of all shapes and levels of coordination, so staking your claim is important, especially once the music starts. Pop, hip-hop , disco and '80s music dominate the DJ’s set list, which is created to complement the moves ranging from basic aerobics to free-wheeling dance steps. Half-way through the class, dancers part like the Red Sea and the middle of Pravada becomes a Soul Train line. I admit, I have yet to shake my groove thang down the line, but most people do so while being cheered on by the group. I rediscovered my abs at Zumba and did some serious work on my legs at NightClub Cardio, which meant walking the next day involved a little hobbling from the good kind of sore. Classes are $10 at the door, $8 if purchased online and $6 with the monthly package from 6:30 to 7:30 p.m. 2815 S Shepherd Dr.

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weekend event planner

These are the top 18 things to do in Houston during Christmas weekend

Photo courtesy of Nutcracker Magical Christmas Ballet

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Welcome to a super-sized edition of CultureMap’s weekend event planner!

Yes, this lineup includes all the post-Christmas happenings going on in Houston – kid flicks at the MFAH, a bourbon-and-boots pop-up, a Beatles cover band show, a holiday burlesque revue, the most dragtastic Sunday brunch in town, etc. But we also threw in a couple events going down on Christmas Day, including some parties where you can see hometown gal Beyoncé Knowles-Carter perform during halftime of the Texans-Ravens game. Don't miss our guides to restaurants open on Christmas, bars that are decorated for the holiday, and all the light displays happening around town.

As Queen Bey would say, let’s get in formation:

Wednesday, December 25

SirDavis American Whisky presents Texans vs. Ravens Watch Parties
As Houston gets ready for the Texans vs. Ravens game — and much-anticipated halftime performance by Beyoncé Knowles-Carter — on Christmas Day, we’ve got watch parties hosted by her brand, SirDavis American Whisky, at six bars and restaurants. Tipsy Lounge, Urban Social, and Rockhouse will have events featuring SirDavis drink specials, photo booths, and a special viewing of the halftime show. The celebrations will also continue post-game at 5015 Bar and The Address, both opening at 6 pm. 3 pm (2 pm Rockhouse).

Houston Christmas Village
After you’re done getting your Christmas Day on with the fam, you can still celebrate the holidays at certain destinations in the city. A great place to start is Houston Christmas Village, which will feature light displays, performances, and flavors that will transport people to international destinations like China, Mexico, India, and Africa. Experiencing the warmth and wonder of their holiday traditions like never before. Through Monday, January 6. 5 pm.

Thursday, December 26

The Museum of Fine Arts, Houston presents Little Kid Flicks and Big Kid Flicks
Celebrate Winter Break at the MFAH with family-friendly film offerings from the touring edition of the New York International Children’s Film Festival. Join more than 100 arts organizations across the country by attending lively collections of short animation, live action, and documentary films reflecting NYICFF’s commitment to storytelling and diversity that are sure to spark meaningful conversations. Little Kid Flicks is designed for ages 5 to 10, while Big Kid Flicksis designed for ages 8 and up. 11:30 am and 2 pm.

Alley Theatre presents A Christmas Carol
You can’t have a Christmas season without A Christmas Carol, Charles Dickens’ timeless tale of a miser literally getting a wake-up call from ghosts who teach him about the true meaning of Christmas.The Alley’s hit new adaptation features colorful Victorian costumes, special effects, magic, dancing, and just the right blend of Christmas carols. It is a dazzling Christmas feast with the beloved story of Ebenezer Scrooge and his miraculous transformation. 7 pm (1:30 and 7 pm Friday and Saturday; 1:30 pm Sunday).

The Continental Club presents Beetle Thursday
Anyone around here celebrate Boxing Day? Originated in the United Kingdom and celebrated in several Commonwealth nations, it’s an occasion to donate gifts to people in need. (It’s also the Brits’ version of Black Friday, when you can shop for post-holiday deals.) The Continental Club will be saluting the day by bringing in Beetle, Houston’s all-Beatles cover band, to perform classic tunes from the Fab Four all evening long. 7 pm.

Trans-Siberian Orchestra in concert
Trans-Siberian Orchestra comes to Houston as part of their The Lost Christmas Eve tour. The group has released seven albums in their career, most recently Letters from the Labyrinth in 2015. But Lost, released way back in 2004, remains their most-recognized opus. Since then, they’ve done two decades of tours, selling 20 million tickets and surpassing more than $20 million in charity donations. Houstonians will have two chances to see them perform the day after Christmas. 3 and 7:30 pm.

Friday, December 27

Echoes presents “A Houston Night for Palestine”
Echoes will host “A Houston Night for Palestine,” an inspiring evening of film, music, art, and culture benefiting the family of the five surfers featured in the 2015 documentary Gaza Surf Club. The event kicks off with DJ sets by Ice House Radio both inside and outside, setting the tone for the night. Then, enjoy a special screening of Gaza, followed by an insightful Q&A with GSC member Ibrahim N. Arafat. After that, there will be live performances featuring Kam Franklin, Marrshun, Kye Loh, and Clarence James. 5 pm.

The Energy Corridor of Houston Orchestra presents Night in Italy
The Energy Corridor of Houston Orchestra (ECHO Orchestra) presents Night in Italy, a nearly New Year’s Eve experience to celebrate the holidays in style. Guests are invited to begin the evening with Italian wine, appetizers, and pastries, accompanied by Italian music both classical and modern by pianist Mary Peterson. The concert will feature performances by tenor Ruben Erazo, soprano McKenzie Garey, and flautist Katherine Rivas Fuentas. 7:30 pm.

Shen Yun
Shen Yun's unique artistic vision expands the theatrical experience into a multi-dimensional, deeply moving journey. Featuring one of the world’s most ancient and richest dance systems — classical Chinese dance — along with dynamic animated backdrops and all-original orchestral works, Shen Yun opens a portal to a civilization of enchanting beauty and enlightening wisdom. Through Tuesday, January 28. 7:30 pm. (2 and 7 pm Saturday; 2 pm Sunday).

Stages presents Panto Pinocchio
Pinocchio, a sentient AI boy, navigates a town obsessed with viral TikTok dances. When Pinocchio embarks on a quest to discover his true essence, he encounters a world of digital mischief and adventure. Will he unlock the secrets to his identity? Or will the conniving villain Miss Treats disrupt the festivities and thwart Pinocchio’s journey? This panto is packed with high-tech hijinks, side-splitting jokes, and enough singing and dancing to reboot even the most jaded of operating systems. Through January 5. 7 pm (2 pm Sunday).

Saturday, December 28

a’Bouzy presents Bourbon, Bubbles and Boots
Champagne-fueled French restaurant a’Bouzy will have an event this weekend that's certain to get people in a warm but rowdy spirit. Republic Boots will be down there for an afternoon pop-up shop, bringing a whole bunch of footwear for folks to peruse. Texas-based Milam & Green Whiskey will serve cocktails. We bet someone in your group will shout “Bottoms up and giddy up!” at some point during the day. 11 am.

Poppy Tart Productions presents Let It Show - Holiday Burlesque
Things will be getting snowy and sinful over at downtown nightclub Henke & Pillot this weekend. Poppy Tart Productions sleighs in Let It Show, a holiday burlesque show curated to put people in a festive mood. This event will feature an atmosphere of burlesque where art, dance, tease, glamour, and humor make the most delicious holiday cocktail. Performers from Los Angeles, New Orleans, and Austin will be featured. 6:30 and 9:30 pm.

Bayou Music Center presents Sheng Wang
Comedian/actor/writer/proud Houstonian Sheng Wang is back in town for a homecoming show at Bayou Music Center. Wang’s first Netflix special, Sweet & Juicy, was released in September 2022. He was a featured stand-up comedian on HBO’s 2 Dope Queens special and also wrote for the ABC show Fresh Off the Boat. 7 pm.

Dinner Detective Murder Mystery Dinner Show
Would you like to spend the holiday season solving a murder? You can always get your sleuth on at the Dinner Detective. Guests will tackle a challenging crime while they feast on dinner. The criminal is lurking somewhere in the room, and guests may find themselves as a prime suspect before they know it. Each admission includes a full dinner, murder mystery entertainment, wait staff gratuity, prize package for Top Sleuth, and more. 6 pm.

Sunday, December 29

Rich’s presents Sunday Service Drag Brunch
Every Sunday, drag contestant (and The Boulet Brothers’ Dragula contestant) Blackberri hosts Rich’s Sunday Service Drag Brunch, featuring a rotating weekly cast. You can watch these performers slay while filling your belly with such delicious dishes as shrimp & grits and chicken & waffles (with such drink choices as mimosas and Bloody Marys, of course). DJ Aracely Manterola provides the brunch beats and DJ Johnny Moreno creates a vibe on the patio before, during, and after each brunch show. 11 am, 1 and 3 pm.

Holiday Afternoon Tea at The Lancaster Hotel
Today is the last day to get holiday afternoon tea at The Lancaster Hotel, located in the heart of Houston’s theater district. Served on Saturdays and Sundays, the tea includes a delectable array of tea sandwiches, decadent cranberry scones, seasonal patisseries, and a selection of exquisite teas from around the world. Guests also receive a complimentary tea tin with the hotel’s specialty holiday spiced black tea. Noon and 2:30 pm.

The River Oaks Theatre presents The Thin Man
You know what’s a good holiday movie no one talks about? The 1934 Pre-Code comedy The Thin Man. Based on Dashiell Hammett’s influential detective novel, the movie stars screen legends William Powell and Myrna Loy as jet-setting, crime-solving couple Nick and Nora Charles. They spend the holiday season in New York City, drinking cocktails and investigating the disappearance/murder of a wealthy man. Although Nick and Nora went on to have several more big-screen adventures, the original is still a blast. 1 pm.

Nutcracker! Magical Christmas Ballet
What better way to close out this holiday weekend than checking out The Nutcracker – Eastern-European style – at Sugar Land’s Smart Financial Centre. Nutcracker! Magical Christmas Ballet will highlight an international cast and Ukrainian principal artists performing at the peak of classical European ballet. Audiences will be transported by the magic of jaw-dropping acrobatics, larger-than-life puppets, and hand-crafted sets and costumes. 3 pm.

Photo courtesy of Nutcracker Magical Christmas Ballet

The Nutcracker! Magical Christmas Ballet will be in Sugar Land this weekend.

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