• Home
  • popular
  • EVENTS
  • submit-new-event
  • CHARITY GUIDE
  • Children
  • Education
  • Health
  • Veterans
  • Social Services
  • Arts + Culture
  • Animals
  • LGBTQ
  • New Charity
  • TRENDING NEWS
  • News
  • City Life
  • Entertainment
  • Sports
  • Home + Design
  • Travel
  • Real Estate
  • Restaurants + Bars
  • Arts
  • Society
  • Innovation
  • Fashion + Beauty
  • subscribe
  • about
  • series
  • Embracing Your Inner Cowboy
  • Green Living
  • Summer Fun
  • Real Estate Confidential
  • RX In the City
  • State of the Arts
  • Fall For Fashion
  • Cai's Odyssey
  • Comforts of Home
  • Good Eats
  • Holiday Gift Guide 2010
  • Holiday Gift Guide 2
  • Good Eats 2
  • HMNS Pirates
  • The Future of Houston
  • We Heart Hou 2
  • Music Inspires
  • True Grit
  • Hoops City
  • Green Living 2011
  • Cruizin for a Cure
  • Summer Fun 2011
  • Just Beat It
  • Real Estate 2011
  • Shelby on the Seine
  • Rx in the City 2011
  • Entrepreneur Video Series
  • Going Wild Zoo
  • State of the Arts 2011
  • Fall for Fashion 2011
  • Elaine Turner 2011
  • Comforts of Home 2011
  • King Tut
  • Chevy Girls
  • Good Eats 2011
  • Ready to Jingle
  • Houston at 175
  • The Love Month
  • Clifford on The Catwalk Htx
  • Let's Go Rodeo 2012
  • King's Harbor
  • FotoFest 2012
  • City Centre
  • Hidden Houston
  • Green Living 2012
  • Summer Fun 2012
  • Bookmark
  • 1987: The year that changed Houston
  • Best of Everything 2012
  • Real Estate 2012
  • Rx in the City 2012
  • Lost Pines Road Trip Houston
  • London Dreams
  • State of the Arts 2012
  • HTX Fall For Fashion 2012
  • HTX Good Eats 2012
  • HTX Contemporary Arts 2012
  • HCC 2012
  • Dine to Donate
  • Tasting Room
  • HTX Comforts of Home 2012
  • Charming Charlie
  • Asia Society
  • HTX Ready to Jingle 2012
  • HTX Mistletoe on the go
  • HTX Sun and Ski
  • HTX Cars in Lifestyle
  • HTX New Beginnings
  • HTX Wonderful Weddings
  • HTX Clifford on the Catwalk 2013
  • Zadok Sparkle into Spring
  • HTX Let's Go Rodeo 2013
  • HCC Passion for Fashion
  • BCAF 2013
  • HTX Best of 2013
  • HTX City Centre 2013
  • HTX Real Estate 2013
  • HTX France 2013
  • Driving in Style
  • HTX Island Time
  • HTX Super Season 2013
  • HTX Music Scene 2013
  • HTX Clifford on the Catwalk 2013 2
  • HTX Baker Institute
  • HTX Comforts of Home 2013
  • Mothers Day Gift Guide 2021 Houston
  • Staying Ahead of the Game
  • Wrangler Houston
  • First-time Homebuyers Guide Houston 2021
  • Visit Frisco Houston
  • promoted
  • eventdetail
  • Greystar Novel River Oaks
  • Thirdhome Go Houston
  • Dogfish Head Houston
  • LovBe Houston
  • Claire St Amant podcast Houston
  • The Listing Firm Houston
  • South Padre Houston
  • NextGen Real Estate Houston
  • Pioneer Houston
  • Collaborative for Children
  • Decorum
  • Bold Rock Cider
  • Nasher Houston
  • Houston Tastemaker Awards 2021
  • CityNorth
  • Urban Office
  • Villa Cotton
  • Luck Springs Houston
  • EightyTwo
  • Rectanglo.com
  • Silver Eagle Karbach
  • Mirador Group
  • Nirmanz
  • Bandera Houston
  • Milan Laser
  • Lafayette Travel
  • Highland Park Village Houston
  • Proximo Spirits
  • Douglas Elliman Harris Benson
  • Original ChopShop
  • Bordeaux Houston
  • Strike Marketing
  • Rice Village Gift Guide 2021
  • Downtown District
  • Broadstone Memorial Park
  • Gift Guide
  • Music Lane
  • Blue Circle Foods
  • Houston Tastemaker Awards 2022
  • True Rest
  • Lone Star Sports
  • Silver Eagle Hard Soda
  • Modelo recipes
  • Modelo Fighting Spirit
  • Athletic Brewing
  • Rodeo Houston
  • Silver Eagle Bud Light Next
  • Waco CVB
  • EnerGenie
  • HLSR Wine Committee
  • All Hands
  • El Paso
  • Avenida Houston
  • Visit Lubbock Houston
  • JW Marriott San Antonio
  • Silver Eagle Tupps
  • Space Center Houston
  • Central Market Houston
  • Boulevard Realty
  • Travel Texas Houston
  • Alliantgroup
  • Golf Live
  • DC Partners
  • Under the Influencer
  • Blossom Hotel
  • San Marcos Houston
  • Photo Essay: Holiday Gift Guide 2009
  • We Heart Hou
  • Walker House
  • HTX Good Eats 2013
  • HTX Ready to Jingle 2013
  • HTX Culture Motive
  • HTX Auto Awards
  • HTX Ski Magic
  • HTX Wonderful Weddings 2014
  • HTX Texas Traveler
  • HTX Cifford on the Catwalk 2014
  • HTX United Way 2014
  • HTX Up to Speed
  • HTX Rodeo 2014
  • HTX City Centre 2014
  • HTX Dos Equis
  • HTX Tastemakers 2014
  • HTX Reliant
  • HTX Houston Symphony
  • HTX Trailblazers
  • HTX_RealEstateConfidential_2014
  • HTX_IW_Marks_FashionSeries
  • HTX_Green_Street
  • Dating 101
  • HTX_Clifford_on_the_Catwalk_2014
  • FIVE CultureMap 5th Birthday Bash
  • HTX Clifford on the Catwalk 2014 TEST
  • HTX Texans
  • Bergner and Johnson
  • HTX Good Eats 2014
  • United Way 2014-15_Single Promoted Articles
  • Holiday Pop Up Shop Houston
  • Where to Eat Houston
  • Copious Row Single Promoted Articles
  • HTX Ready to Jingle 2014
  • htx woodford reserve manhattans
  • Zadok Swiss Watches
  • HTX Wonderful Weddings 2015
  • HTX Charity Challenge 2015
  • United Way Helpline Promoted Article
  • Boulevard Realty
  • Fusion Academy Promoted Article
  • Clifford on the Catwalk Fall 2015
  • United Way Book Power Promoted Article
  • Jameson HTX
  • Primavera 2015
  • Promenade Place
  • Hotel Galvez
  • Tremont House
  • HTX Tastemakers 2015
  • HTX Digital Graffiti/Alys Beach
  • MD Anderson Breast Cancer Promoted Article
  • HTX RealEstateConfidential 2015
  • HTX Vargos on the Lake
  • Omni Hotel HTX
  • Undies for Everyone
  • Reliant Bright Ideas Houston
  • 2015 Houston Stylemaker
  • HTX Renewable You
  • Urban Flats Builder
  • Urban Flats Builder
  • HTX New York Fashion Week spring 2016
  • Kyrie Massage
  • Red Bull Flying Bach
  • Hotze Health and Wellness
  • ReadFest 2015
  • Alzheimer's Promoted Article
  • Formula 1 Giveaway
  • Professional Skin Treatments by NuMe Express

    Fresh Start

    Celebrating sobriety in year 5: After hitting a speed bump, the future looks bright

    Ted M
    Sep 7, 2016 | 2:00 pm
    New beginnings sobriety sign
    Even after setbacks, there's always hope for new beginnings.
    Courtesy photo

    Editor's Note: In previous essays for CultureMap, Ted M reflected on marking four anniversaries of sobriety. In this essay, he looks at his life now.

    It’s year 5 in this annual post, and when we left off last I was landing on the shores of beautiful Los Angeles. My recovery task was clear, and I simply had to get to it. Action, growth and opportunity were at my feet. It has been over half a decade without a drink, but the story doesn't end there.

    The cross-country move was taxing from the start and the adjustments were challenging, yet very doable. In California, getting used to the importance of saving seats before meetings, a different tone and pattern to format, regional pride to the way recovery was offered, all of these were simple adjustments, with no right or wrong to their merit.

    I recall being in a room where the discussion broke out, almost a debate of who had the better recovery – New York, Los Angeles or Paris. Interesting fodder, when I raised my hand self-righteousnessly and said with sincere conviction, I wasn’t aware that city location had any effect and that whether it was Paris, France or Paris, Texas — it was taught to me that there wasn’t a geographic solution to this affliction, but rather one uniform answer— find a Higher Power greater than myself and embrace that.

    Sitting down smugly, so proud, I thought, "See I showed them." Here I was judging and perceiving all the ego in the room, and I was the one being Douchey McDoucher.

    Imbalance in the journey

    Recovery has been my entire life the past four years – social, personal, otherwise and that was more than okay with me. I had lived a well-heeled existence, traveled the world and experienced love in relationships in my non-sober life, so my thought pattern was this was my time to be solely focused on others and giving back. Even with that good intent, there was imbalance in my journey which was not clear to me. I was willing to show up, be of service, be kind and positive, but my expectations of others was chipping away at that veneer, which on the outside, looked at peace, but the inner me was beginning to be spiritually sick.

    My employment proved more complex, the business side of treatment, in my vision, proved to be more monetary driven than recovery based. Naive as that statement may seem, I honestly wasn’t prepared for that. People with double-digit sobriety, decades in the program, offered proposals and visions that seemed morally compromising and at times outfight offensive to me. I was used to these activities in the corporate world I had left behind but this seemed testing to me, and these gut punches took their toll on my inner peace.

    To be fair, most of the requests were likely appropriate, yet some were outrageously offensive. I simply forgot to check my internal fear barometer and then mistakenly perceived certain people to represent the whole of recovery, rather than the humans they are, that I am, flawed and imperfect.

    Over the past four years I had been a proverbial Little Red Riding Hood, whistling through the forest of recovery, not a care in the world, with the wolf fast approaching. In my moment of spiritual crisis, I wanted to describe the lurking foe as these people who had wronged, me and this institution I loved so much, but the true identity of the preying beast was my disease, loneliness, and unwillingness to call myself out in the moment of truth.

    The wolf knocked on the door

    So the wolf knocked on the door, and I not only graciously let him in, I immediately turned all that I had worked so hard for, over to the moment. I distinctly recall, as that moment approached, all I had to do was phone a friend, my recovery wing-man, a guy I had reached out to often in my first year and say this is about to happen, and he would have provided the anti-wolf repellant he had on previous calls.

    I selfishly didn’t have the resolve, and yet, surely with all the worldly injustices I had been forced to endure, I was due this vacation into half measures. Surely.

    So Memorial weekend 2015 came and went, the insanity and darkness were back in a blink, and four days later I made the call, the call that always comes after the fact. The cry was to a great recovery friend back in Texas who I texted daily, but we only saved actual phone conversation for the serious matter. I think even he was surprised to hear me ask, what next after a week with a meth pipe in my mouth. Patience, empathy, and realness was given; instructions on immediately getting back on the horse was the suggestion.

    Reluctantly, I knew what came next. I came clean to my home group in LA and then flew to Texas and sat with friends who had meant so much to me and shared my faulty story.

    Depression set in and after being a go-to guy in recovery, I was now a person with days. It was daunting but my earned reality. My purpose in life seemed gone. I did go back to the rooms, and days returned to months, but it was clear California was not the place for me — but what next?

    Time for a move

    It made sense to go back to my hometown of St. Louis and get my sea legs back. With that move came an opportunity to be of service to my ailing/aging parents who were both suffering from stages of Alzheimer’s. It’s a tough disease to visit, let alone immerse yourself into 24/7 for six months. My efforts were genuine and present daily until it was time to reclaim my life.

    It was here in St Louis where I stepped into my next bear trap. Going to meetings, friends would ask how much sobriety I had, and being in an AA meeting, I’d think “singleness of purpose.” I’d look at my app reminding me of years–months-hours, “don’t drink at any cost.” I hadn’t – so – I have four years and change. Surely I did.

    I knew this layover was temporary and I couldn’t give what I didn’t have, so I didn’t do what I love most — sponsor guys. I did go to meetings daily and regained some semblance of spiritual strength.

    When it came time to make the next move – the destination was an old haunt/ Milwaukee, a Midwest choice I thought would offer calm, peace and simplicity to this re-foundation. I went with the idea of shifting from the business side of recovery to the counseling side. School was called for and that vision is still being shaped. I came to town and did what I do — pour myself into the recovery community, going to two meetings a day to get to know the fellowship. But as time went by something was amiss.

    I am very clear I made my own bed — so I own that — I will also put out there, moving from Houston to Austin to LA to STL to Milwaukee over the past 18 months takes a toll on a person of a certain age. While visiting a town and going to a meeting is most often a welcoming and inspiring experience, trying to become a sincere part of a fellowship is an earned exercise and the constant movement has been challenging to that goal, at best.

    Facing the truth

    As I write this entry it was to be the week to “celebrate” my five years of sobriety. On a Monday I went to my usual meetings to announce I hadn’t drank in five years, but the proclamation was hallow and dirty. On Tuesday, of course the topic was honesty and this kid I respected said the exact right thing, “I can’t pick and choose my truth.” They say God speaks to us though those in the rooms, and that man might as well have had a bullhorn, shouting, “Hey Ted, I got a message from God for you — you can’t mold your own version.”

    I knew the truth, I know sobriety means clean too. I was resentful that after my wolf came in LA, I did the next right thing, I got honest and told all concerned in LA and Texas. If I wanted to have courage I had to get vulnerable.

    So I asked myself and a couple mentors, how often do I have to fall on the sword of honesty? And before anyone spoke, I answered myself, I had been the one who rolled into new towns too prideful to announce months not years, no one would have cared — they would have simply said “great, welcome, have a seat.” My reimagining the term sober, wanting credit where none was owed or due, had planted the wrong seeds, so I now had to reap the bad crop, and if I wanted peace of mind, I had to make things right.

    I’ve always thought recovery is a shift from "I have to" to opportunities — the opportunity to go to meetings, to get some dignity/respect back or for the first time, to be of service, to grow spiritually and deconstruct ego. My opportunity for this make-do, came to me after that Tuesday meeting in the form of a giant red nail — the object given to the person asked to give the lead at the large men’s meeting on Saturday.

    I’m sure fear will accompany me as I stand up in front of all those men and tell my truth. But the way I see it, for the cost of an hour of anxiety, some words, my release of what others hear or feel, pushing a reset button. I get to breath. I get true freedom. I get to walk out with a head held up. Hoopefully I get to put a positive lesson out there to a newcomer. That list is priceless.

    Today I am grateful I have 16 months of true recovery under my belt. I'm back in the middle of the program, but in a more balanced version.

    A seemingly small time has passed since 2011 but I’m here to report, I love recovery, the opportunities it offers me and all who care to thoroughly follow its path. My trip through the recovery woods is shifting and reshaping right under my feet, the wolf is always out there. But as long as I clean house, help others, and trust God, grandmother can expect me at the end.

    --------------------------

    Editor's Note: Because the Twelve Step philosophy is to preserve anonymity, we have not published Ted M.'s full name. However, he can be reached by email at tjmann14@yahoo.com.

    Previous columns in this series:

    Celebrating a year of sobriety: Giving up the celebrity good life for a life worth living

    Celebrating a second year of sobriety: The challenges are many, the rewards are great

    Celebrating 3 years of sobriety: Still one day at a time but, at last, ready to date and plan future

    Celebrating 4 years of sobriety: Not as much drama but most challenging year so far

    families
    news/city-life

    flag-waving news

    Texas drops on new list of most patriotic states in U.S.

    Amber Heckler
    Jun 19, 2025 | 3:30 pm
    American flag, Texas flag, patriotism
    Photo by Ray Shrewsberry on Unsplash
    Texas ranked a dismal No. 45 this year after previously ranking as the 36th most patriotic state in 2024.

    This may come as a surprise for many Texans, but the Lone Star State is far from being the most patriotic place in America, according to a new report.

    WalletHub's latest study ranking the "Most Patriotic States in America" for 2025 placed Texas near the bottom of the list as No. 45, marking a significant nine-place drop from its rank as the 36th most patriotic state in 2024.

    According to the findings, the three most patriotic states in America are Virginia (No. 1), Montana (No. 2), and Vermont (No. 3). Colorado (No. 4) and Oregon (No. 5) round out the top five most passionate, flag-waving states in 2025.

    Texas flopped toward the bottom mainly due to its civic engagement rank (No. 47), but it did perform fairly well in the military engagement category (No. 13).

    Texas has the third-highest average number of military enlistees, the report found, but it had the second-lowest percentage of adults who voted in the 2024 presidential election.

    WalletHub analyst Chip Lupo said patriotism can't be defined by geographic region or by which states fly the most American flags. Rather, true patriotism can be found in states with high voter turnouts, high volunteer rates, and more.

    “The most patriotic states have a lot of residents who serve or have served in the armed forces, high voter turnouts during elections, and a high share of the population volunteering with national or local organizations," Lupo said.

    States like Virginia and Montana ranked at the top of the list due to their high voter turnout rates during the 2024 presidential election, plus high volunteer rates in local or national organizations. Virginia is also home to the third-highest population of active-duty military personnel per 100,000 civilians, and there are 27 military bases in the state.

    The report further acknowledges that many Americans may not be feeling very patriotic this year because of "societal issues" that span from "relentless high inflation" to tragedies like mass shootings.

    "Many people may find it hard to celebrate a country where countless people are struggling and frequent violence persists," the report's author wrote. "However, an expression of love for fellow citizens is patriotic in itself."

    Joining Texas among the least patriotic American states are Florida (No. 46), Alabama (No. 47), Louisiana (No. 48), New York (No. 49), and Arkansas (No. 50).

    The top 10 most patriotic states in America are:

    • No. 1 – Virginia
    • No. 2 – Montana
    • No. 3 – Vermont
    • No. 4 – Colorado
    • No. 5 – Oregon
    • No. 6 – Washington
    • No. 7 – North Dakota
    • No. 8 – Maryland
    • No. 9 – Minnesota
    • No. 10 – New Hampshire
    The report analyzed all 50 states across 13 "indicators of patriotism" based on military and civic engagement, including factors such as the rate of veterans living in each state for every 1,000 civilians; the share of adults who voted in the 2024 presidential election and the 2020 primary elections; the number of AmeriCorps volunteers per capita, and more.
    texaswallethubreportspatriotism
    news/city-life
    CULTUREMAP EMAILS ARE AWESOME
    Get Houston intel delivered daily.
    Loading...