It's 10 p.m., do you know where your vuvuzela is?

More Houston soccer fans than you'd think came face-to-horn with that question as they filed for the Reliant Stadium exits Wednesday night.

Manchester United toyed with America's professional soccer league in an artistic 5-2 runaway of an MLS All-Star Game. Federico Macheda — Man U's 18-year-old budding Terrell Owens' personality — scored two goals, should have had a third and yelled at a teammate when he thought he could have gotten a fourth. Javier Hernandez — the first Mexican player in the Red Devils' storied history — made his debut with a breakaway goal. The Houston Dynamo's own Brian Ching scored a fleeting-game-tightening goal that wasn't meaningless to him (or any of his fans), called it "awesome" and then sprinted off to the House of Blues' after-party he was hosting.

In short, everyone went into the night happy. Well, everyone except for those who tried to bring their vuvuzela into the stadium. The notorious noisemakers that are much more well known in America than 98 percent of the MLS players are officially banned at all Dynamo-involved games in the Bayou City.

But the regulation never came into play much until Manchester United, a lingering World Cup buzz and some inspired MLS and Dynamo marketing packed 70,728 people into the Houston Texans' house on a night when not a single helmet was in sight.

Then, well ... red, green and blue vuvuzelas abound. At least in all the parking lots charging that $20 full Texans-game price.

"I just had to bring one," Alex Wilkens said, clutching his hulking long red vuvuzela (his girlfriend had the rare purple vuvuzela). "They're such an essential part of the game."

No, they're really not. These supposed soccer lifelines stayed in the parking lots too — or more often, the collection bins of banned contraband. For all of the horns seen on the clogged streets surrounding Reliant Stadium, not a single one seemed to make it inside.

Which is really something of an epic fail, considering all the crazy things that have been snuck into European soccer stadiums with much tighter security.

But not even the most strident soccer man was going to fault Houston for anything on this night.

"When you go and play in the stadium, the size of the crowd and the atmosphere, you’re motivated by that," said Manchester United manager Sir Alex Ferguson, who received the largest ovation during the introductions. "I think that was a good omen for our players. To come out, see the stadium, good pitch, big crowd, it was perfect for them.”

Indeed, the grass at Reliant Stadium did look wonderful and one was quickly reminded how much better it is to watch a professional soccer game in person than on TV.

Hockey backers always claim that's true in their sport (even though it's really not). But with soccer, it is.

There was an almost giddiness at being part of something big, something that still felt new, that ran through the stadium. It was enough to even forgive the wave.

Now, the wave is one of the most vile crimes regularly perpetrated in the land of sports. It's often done without even thinking these days, a rote bit that couldn't be any more tediously forced than if the command to start was flashed on the scoreboard (and in some places it is).

Thankfully, the one at the MLS All-Star Game was more organic than that. It began with Man U already up 2-0 less than 12 minutes into the game — and it was a rare joy with people just genuinely excited that they could do it 70,000 strong (this was a real, fannies-in-the-seats sellout as opposed to forced one) at a soccer game.

Then, after two full trips around the stadium it was over — in the nick of time.

The "USA! USA! USA!" chants were a little harder to stomach, especially considering that many of MLS's best players aren't from America, just like many of Manchester United's are not English. It would be sort of like cheering "Texas! Texas!" at an NFL game. But hey, people were excited and if those actually screaming for the overmatched MLS guys — fans who were clearly in the minority — needed some nonsensical motivation to go against the Red Devil masses ... well, it was a special night.

"Houston is a big event town," Houston Dynamo chief operating officer Chris Canetti said. "This town knows how to put on a show."

So does Manchester United's youngsters. This was essential Man U's B team (minus the supernova stars) and it absolutely picked part the MLS' best (essentially minus Landon Donovan, who played the last 15 minutes, but looked even more tired than anyone imagined). Picture the New York Yankees playing a middle-of-the-road Triple A squad and you have the idea.

Macheda intercepted one of laziest passes you'll ever see from MLS defender Kevin Alston and swooped in on an overmatched Donovan Ricketts — who's used to facing shots from Red Bulls not Red Devils — to send a shot screaming into the lower right corner for a 1-0 lead. Twenty nine seconds into the game.

Luckily, the introductions were so long that almost everyone was actually already in their seats.

"We were well prepared," Macheda said.

Which separates Man U from the Bayou City's vuvuzela rookies too.

"I didn't think they'd stonewall us from going in with it," Lori Hullerson said sadly, sitting on the curb, waiting to reunite with her horn.

And look at all that traffic snarling Kirby they'll have to endure to go home together, cars packed bumper-to-bumper — for a soccer game.