The qualifying criteria to be appointed Houston Pride Festival and Parade celebrity grand marshal are 1) be a celebrity 2) have sexy abs and 3) be proficient at "the wave" — in addition to being gay, so it seems.

Because having any sort of Houston connection would be too much trouble — again, so it seems.

This year's hot VIP will be Madison Hildebrand, one of the stars of Bravo's real estate reality show Million Dollar Listing Los Angeles. The happy magnate is set to lead the parade on June 23.

Hildebrand has plenty going for him: Awesome hair, pearly whites and plenty of Benjamins, as one would expect from someone whose first residential sale was $2.8 million (go ahead and calculate the three percent commission).

Most recently, Hildebrand got the listing agreement for the Malibu estate of Tony Cassara, former Paramount Pictures Television Stations Group president, for $6 million. He also listed Tori Spelling and Dean McDermott's beach pad and received a nice pat on the back from his alma mater Pepperdine University for being a go-getter.

It's a stretch, but we understand the real estate connection. Houston has a strong housing market, Hildebrand knows how to sell houses.

Other than that — and being gay — wouldn't it be absolutely fabulous if the parade's top banana indeed had some sort of Bayou City roots?

I suppose one can make the argument that the local leading troupe — female grand marshal transgendered Jenifer R. Poole, male grand marshal hair god Nicolas Brines and ally grand marshal politician Ellen Cohen — take care of our hunger for something homegrown. Meh, we are not convinced.

There is one new addition to the "escort" lineup and that's a nonprofit grand marshal, which has yet to be revealed.

Tell us in the comments: Are you cool with Hildebrand? Did you know who he was prior to reading this story?