Finding a surprising lack of Osteen's comedic work on the book market, Christian writer Don Pasco decided to take matters into his own hands and self publish a collection of the Osteen's greatest hits.
For a mere $2.99, fans now can get some of Osteen's best material in a single Amazon e-book.
Highlights include the one about the burglar who was told by a parrot that "Jesus was watching" as he tries to steal a stereo.
Parrot: I'm just trying to warn you. Burglar: Warn me about what? Who are you? Parrot: My name is Moses. Burglar: What kind of crazy people would name a parrot Moses? Parrot: The same kind of people that would name a 150-pound Rottweiler, "Jesus."
The book squeezes in two dozen more gems that manage to lampoon everyone from kindergartners to senior citizens. Not even the late Pope John Paul II escapes Osteen's quick wit.
Pasco — a Baltimore native who "played drums and sang in a Top 40 band" during the 1970s, according to his Amazon bio — clearly states that the book is "for entertainment purposes only."
Unfortunately, Osteen's legal team sees little humor in the unauthorized enterprise. Lakewood Church is reviewing the book for possible copyright infringements.
Houston pastor and comedian Joel Osteen is the subject of a new unauthorized joke book.
WGNMagazine
Houston pastor and comedian Joel Osteen is the subject of a new unauthorized joke book.
For every well-known/successful actor in Hollywood, there are thousands of others whose lives are more tenuous as they struggle to find work. The new film Misty Green is about one such actor who, after a period in the limelight, now finds herself on the outskirts of the industry, just hoping to find her way back in.
Misty (Rosalind Eleazar) won an Emmy for a 2000s-era TV show that still gets her recognition, but not much work. Still living in the apartment of a recently-deceased man with whom she was having an affair, Misty spends her days sleeping in and her nights getting blitzed on alcohol and drugs. She seems to be heading nowhere fast until a few things coincide to break up her routine.
The man’s wife (Amy Landecker) shows up and tells her she has seven days to vacate the apartment; Misty’s brother, Jay (Daniel Kaluuya) — who is bipolar — arrives after being kicked out of his facility for non-payment; and Jordan (Chris Rock), a former colleague with whom she had a falling-out, reappears in her life, offering a possible chance to rehabilitate her image.
Written and directed by Rock (his first feature since 2014’s Top Five), the film is a funny and excruciating look at how the entertainment industry might actually work. Misty is her own worst enemy thanks to late nights fraternizing with unsavory characters like Zach (Adam Driver), who deals in drugs and women in equal measure, but her frustration proves warranted when her agent, Randy (Topher Grace), and casting directors like Rhonda (Tracie Thoms) hardly give her the time of day.
Misty tries her best to stay positive, but when jobs like singing in a bar are the best she can do, the mountain seems insurmountable. Rock does an effective job of demonstrating the elements that are within and without Misty’s control that affect her ability to regain her position in the industry. The chip on her shoulder is almost as big as the bias some have against her, and other negative circumstances don’t help matters much.
There are many small touches that Rock and his crew put in the film to give it an air of authenticity. Filming in Los Angeles (a rarity these days), Rock uses both subtle and overt shots of homeless people in the city, suggesting that the line between the haves and have-nots is a fine one, especially with Misty on the verge of not having a place to live. He also has cameos from a few of his funny friends, including a bit of meta-casting of Anthony Anderson (who has faded a bit after starring in Black-ish) in a bit part as a cop.
Eleazar, a British actor best known for appearing on the Apple TV show Slow Horses, is a magnetic presence as Misty. The character herself is somewhat cringey in her decision-making, and Eleazar sells every bit of her righteous indignation and self-defeating actions. The supporting cast is great across the board, including Rock, Driver, Kaluuya, Thoms, Grace, Anna Kendrick, and Rich Sommer.
Misty Green makes you rage against the Hollywood machine, laugh at the various ways different people deal with its maddening quirks, and hide behind your fingers as Misty chooses options that don’t help, either voluntarily or because her back is against the wall. It’s a powerhouse of acting that gives a unique angle on the inner workings of Hollywood, one that ironically might be competing for awards at year’s end.
