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Movie Review

The Old Guard revs up the senses with great action and fascinating story

Alex Bentley
Jul 10, 2020 | 10:45 am
The Old Guard revs up the senses with great action and fascinating story
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It’s pretty difficult to come up with an original idea in this day and age. Most movies tend to repeat the same beats of those that have preceded them, changing up the details so the copying doesn’t seem too blatant. The new action movie The Old Guard has many familiar elements, but its unique story is where it stands out.

Charlize Theron stars as Andy, the leader of a group of mercenaries who have one defining quality: They are all immortal. Their immortality is unexplained, but the group – which also includes Booker (Matthias Schoenaerts), Joe (Marwen Kenzari), and Nicky (Luca Marinelli) – has used it to fight various battles over the course of many centuries.

Andy, the eldest, is starting to experience a dissatisfaction with their ability to actually solve any of the world’s ills. She’s both disheartened and reinvigorated when a new person, Nile (Kiki Layne) joins the group after being killed in action in Afghanistan. At the same time, they are being hunted down by Copley (Chiwetel Ejiofor), who works for Merrick (Harry Melling), the head of a secretive pharmaceutical group who wants to study and dissect them so their traits can be used to treat others.

Immortality is certainly not a new idea, nor is being an immortal mercenary, as Deadpool would gladly tell you. But there’s something about this multi-ethnic, female-led group that makes it supremely fascinating and entertaining. Directed by Gina Prince-Bythewood and written by Greg Rucka (who also wrote the graphic novel on which it is based), the film is more progressive than your typical comic book movie, even prominently including a same-sex relationship.

It is also ruthlessly bloody, whether it's the violent ways each member of the group is either killed or maimed multiple times, or in the brutality they unleash on others. There’s something balletic about the fight scenes, coordinated by Daniel Hernandez. The female fight scenes in Marvel movies have developed an expectation for such sequences, but Hernandez, the actors, and the stunt performers come up with a variety of different touches that make these impress every time.

If the story gets a bit wonky toward the end, Rucka and Prince-Bythewood can be forgiven as they’ve already delivered a great introduction to characters that most people don’t know. It looks like they’re aiming for franchise status – Rucka has written 10 issues, so there’s no lack of source material – and the end of the film sets up a possible sequel extremely well.

From Mad Max: Fury Road to Atomic Blonde to The Fast & the Furious series, Theron has established herself as a legit action star, and she doesn’t disappoint here. Combined with her top-notch acting skills, she is magnetic throughout. Layne, who was captivating in If Beale Street Could Talk, holds her own, carving out her own space in a film dominated by Theron. Schoenaerts, Kenzari, and Marinelli each get their own moments to shine, and Ejiofor makes the most of his limited time on screen.

The Old Guard brings something new to the table for the comic book action genre, popping off the screen despite being limited by its debut on Netflix. It’s equal to or better than many recent big screen action movies, with a lot more to say than most of them as well.

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The Old Guard will premiere on Netflix on July 10.

Charlize Theron in The Old Guard.

Charlize Theron in The Old Guard
Photo by Aimee Spinks/Netflix
Charlize Theron in The Old Guard.
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Movie Review

Meta-comedy remake Anaconda coils itself into an unfunny mess

Alex Bentley
Dec 26, 2025 | 2:30 pm
Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda
Photo by Matt Grace
Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda.

In Hollywood’s never-ending quest to take advantage of existing intellectual property, seemingly no older movie is off limits, even if the original was not well-regarded. That’s certainly the case with 1997’s Anaconda, which is best known for being a lesser entry on the filmography of Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez, as well as some horrendous accent work by Jon Voight.

The idea behind the new meta-sequel Anaconda is arguably a good one. Four friends — Doug (Jack Black), Griff (Paul Rudd), Claire (Thandiwe Newton), and Kenny (Steve Zahn) — who made homemade movies when they were teenagers decide to remake Anaconda on a shoestring budget. Egged on by Griff, an actor who can’t catch a break, the four of them pull together enough money to fly down to Brazil, hire a boat, and film a script written by Doug.

Naturally, almost nothing goes as planned in the Amazon, including losing their trained snake and running headlong into a criminal enterprise. Soon enough, everything else takes second place to the presence of a giant anaconda that is stalking them and anyone else who crosses its path.

Written and directed by Tom Gormican, with help from co-writer Kevin Etten, the film is designed to be an outrageous comedy peppered with laugh-out-loud moments that cover up the fact that there’s really no story. That would be all well and good … if anything the film had to offer was truly funny. Only a few scenes elicit any honest laughter, and so instead the audience is fed half-baked jokes, a story with no focus, and actors who ham it up to get any kind of reaction.

The biggest problem is that the meta-ness of the film goes too far. None of the core four characters possess any interesting traits, and their blandness is transferred over to the actors playing them. And so even as they face some harrowing situations or ones that could be funny, it’s difficult to care about anything they do since the filmmakers never make the basic effort of making the audience care about them.

It’s weird to say in a movie called Anaconda, but it becomes much too focused on the snake in the second half of the film. If the goal is to be a straight-up comedy, then everything up to and including the snake attacks should be serving that objective. But most of the time the attacks are either random or moments when the characters are already scared, and so any humor that could be mined all but disappears.

Black and Rudd are comedy all-stars who can typically be counted on to elevate even subpar material. That’s not the case here, as each only scores on a few occasions, with Black’s physicality being the funniest thing in the movie. Newton is not a good fit with this type of movie, and she isn’t done any favors by some seriously bad wigs. Zahn used to be the go-to guy for funny sidekicks, but he brings little to the table in this role.

Any attempt at rebooting/remaking an old piece of IP should make a concerted effort to differentiate itself from the original, and in that way, the new Anaconda succeeds. Unfortunately, that’s its only success, as the filmmakers can never find the right balance to turn it into the bawdy comedy they seemed to want.

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Anaconda is now playing in theaters.

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