The Great American Bro'd Trip Day 5

Obnoxious Red Sox fans, $1 dogs, Midwest hospitality and a colonic: Just anotherday in baseball

After eating at a bunch of charming places like this, you too would need acolonic.
Photo by Jeremy C. Little
One-dollar hot dogs and $10 seats ... is this heaven?
Photo by Jeremy C. Little
Another day, another 300 miles, another ballpark.
This was just his first round of dogs.
Photo by Jeremy C. Little

After several frozen cocktails at Under the Volcano on empty stomachs, converted Houstonians Jeremy C. Little (a publicist) and Colin “Dabbo” Dabbs (a junior high history teacher) finally decided to do it. Eight days, 10 Major League ballparks, the Budweiser brewery, and enough fried food to give Carlos Lee the gout. It’s the Great American Bro'd Trip and this is the account of day five.

Day 5: South Bend, Ind.–Mars, Penn.: 359 miles

Strapping on the feed bag
Immediately following our swan song at Yankee Stadium, I pledge to eat nothing but salad for a week. Middle America, I love you, but at this rate I’m going to wind up diabetic and missing a foot before I hit 40.

I always make an effort to support mom & pop shop dining establishments, but after a solid week of patty melts, fried cheese sticks and French fries, I’m in dire need of a shower and a colonic. Case in point: We found a fantastic little place in Edon, Ohio called The Feed Mill. It was the sort of lunch counter that you can still find throughout West Texas: Uncomplicated, greasy, and delicious. Now somebody find me some sweatpants.

Dollar dogs, booty shorts and snatching defeat from the jaws of victory
For all of Wrigley’s charm and U.S. Cellular’s functionality, Chicago’s neighbor to the east boasts the finest stadium experience we’ve yet to encounter on this trip. Progressive Field (formerly Jacobs Field) is an incredible mix of accessibility, affordability ($5 parking, $10 seats), and classic-meets-modern design

Throw in $1 dollar hot dogs, perfect baseball weather, and a visit by the Boston Red Sox, and you’ve got all the makings of a perfect evening (at least until Sox skipper Terry Francona turned to temporary closer Daniel Bard in the ninth).

The crowd was made up of rowdy Red Sox fans, a smattering of mostly-friendly Cleveland supporters, and a ton of jail bait. I’m not sure when it became acceptable to wear booty shorts to a baseball game, but here’s to progress.

Our section was packed with teenagers, almost none of whom were actually watching the game. If I’m every blessed with children, they’re going to boarding school so I don’t have to look at them from the ages of 15 through 22. No, you’re not cool and that girl to your left will never, ever touch you, you pubescent freak. Sit down, shut up, and get out my way so I can get back to whipping batteries at the left fielder.

By the top of the first inning, nearly 10,000 $1 dollar hot dogs had already been purchased, most of them by Dabbo. I texted Doogie back in Houston to let him know he was missing out on dollar dog night which lead to the following exchange:

ME: Dollar hot dog night at The Jake. If I don’t make it, please keep this out of my obituary.

DOOGIE: He died happy, with a wiener in his mouth.

That’s what happens when you toss Doogie a slow pitch over the plate. Touch ‘em all, Doogie.

The game itself saw the Sox blow a 5-0 lead in the middle innings (no surprises there). They then earned a one run advantage thanks to Adrian Beltre’s two-run blast to left in the top of the ninth, only to watch closer Daniel Bard walk the Indians leadoff hitter in the bottom of the ninth on four pitches, then load the bases with no outs. Bard recorded two outs, the first via strikeout and the second a pop out to the catcher.

Journeyman Russell Branyan delivered the groin punch with a two-run single into shallow right over a leaping Dustin Pedroia giving the Tribe and 8-7 walk off victory. These are the Red Sox I know and loathe.

Douche/not a douche: Red Sox Nation (That's us!)
Yes, for this round of “Douche / Not a Douche” we’re taking a long, hard look in the mirror. The former sad sacks of fandom, Red Sox backers — thanks to two World Championships in six years — have reached a new plateau of obnoxiousness using a paradoxical combination of hubris and historic pessimism.

The evidence: We descend on your stadium, make ourselves at home, jack up the ticket prices, curse in front of your kids, drink like Norwegian longshoremen, boo our own players, and use the word “wicked” to describe everything. We were insufferable when we were cursed, and we’re even worse following title parades in 2004 and 2007.

In our defense: Have you ever been to New England in winter? C’mon people, this is all we’ve got.

The verdict: Individually, we’re solid, salt of earth folks who genuinely love our team and the game. Collectively, we’re a whole big pile of unrepentant douche. Sorry, we can’t help it.

Off to our nation’s capital . . .

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Now hear this

New Texas museum shines spotlight on Tejano music history

Totally Tejano Hall of Fame and Museum, San Antonio, tejano music

Photo by Edmond Ortiz

Roger Hernandez serves as board president of the Totally Tejano Hall of Fame and Museum.

For a city that proudly calls itself the capital of Tejano music, San Antonio has long been missing a permanent place to honor the genre’s pioneers and preserve its history. That gap officially closed In December with the opening of the Totally Tejano Hall of Fame and Museum at 1414 Fredericksburg Rd.

The music couldn’t have found a better steward than its founder and board president. Roger Hernandez has had his finger on the pulse of Tejano music for decades. His company, En Caliente Productions, has provided a platform for countless performing artists and songwriters in Tejano, conjunto, and regional Mexican music since 1982.

Hernandez says his wife, who ran a shop at Market Square years ago, would often get questions from visitors about the location of a physical Tejano music museum, a thing that simply did not exist. In 2022, he banded together with friends, family, and other local Tejano music supporters to make the nonprofit Hall of Fame a reality.

“I decided I've been in the music scene for over 40 years, it's time to do a museum,” Hernandez recalls.

Hernandez says a brick-and-mortar Tejano music museum has long been needed to remember musical acts and other individuals who grew the genre across Texas and northern Mexico, especially those who are aging. Recently, the community lost famed Tejano music producer Manny Guerra and Abraham Quintanilla, the renowned Tejano singer/songwriter and father of the late superstar Selena Quintanilla-Perez. Both deaths occurred roughly one week after the Totally Tejano museum opened to the public.

“They're all dying. They're all getting older, and we need to acknowledge all these people,” Hernandez says.

The Totally Tejano Museum — named after Hernandez’s Totally Tejano Television Roku streaming — has 5,000 square feet of space packed with plaques, photos, promotional posters, musical instruments, and other memorabilia honoring the pioneers and stars of the beloved genre. Mannequins wear stage outfits from icons like Laura Canales and Flaco Jimenez, and a wall of photos remembers late greats. Totally Tejano Television plays legendary performances on a loop, bringing the exhibits to life.

The newly opened Totally Tejano Hall of Fame and Museum includes a growing collection of memorabilia. Photo by Edmond Ortiz

Hernandez says the museum will soon welcome permanent and rotating exhibits, including traveling shows, a Hall of Fame section, and an area paying homage to Chicano music crossovers, such as the late Johnny Rodriguez, the South Texas singer-songwriter who blended country with Tex-Mex music. Plans call for the organization to hold its inaugural Hall of Fame induction in February 2026.

Eventually, a 2,000 square feet back room will be converted into additional display space and host industry gatherings, community symposiums, and record and video release parties. The museum also plans to add a gift and record shop and a music learning room where visitors can listen to early Tejano music and browse archival photos. Hernandez is already talking with local school districts about educational field trips.

Much like Tejano itself, the museum is a grassroots production. Hernandez and fellow board members have used their own money to rent, renovate, develop, and maintain the museum space. The board also leads the selection of the Hall of Fame honorees and curates the exhibits.

Hernandez has been heartened by the museum’s reception, both from media outlets and music fans around Texas and beyond.

“We had a radio station come in this morning from Houston to interview us,” he says. “People have come in from Lubbock, Texas. We have had people from Midland, Texas. We have another person who emailed us who’s coming in from New York. People are learning all about us.”

That includes many of the musicians who helped shape the genre. Johnny Hernandez, Sunny Ozuna, Elida Reyna, and Danny Martinez from Danny and The Tejanos are among the luminaries who have already graced the halls.

The Totally Tejano Hall of Fame and Museum is now open 10 am-6 pm, Tuesday-Sunday, and closed Monday. Admission is free, but donations are encouraged. Fans can call 210-314-1310 for more information.

san antonio tejano music museums hall of fame music openings

The Great American Bro'd Trip Day 5

Obnoxious Red Sox fans, $1 dogs, Midwest hospitality and a colonic: Just anotherday in baseball

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