Sound Check

Do Susan Boyle a favor— don't buy her album

Susan Boyle the cover of her new CD, "I Dreamed a Dream"
Susan Boyle

It needs to be said. It should have been said months ago. I’m going to be the first to say it.

Susan Boyle is not meant to be a star. If you have a compassionate bone in your body, you will do what’s best for her and not buy her new album.

That may sound harsh, but it is honest. And right now Boyle needs a little honesty.

Those who patronize Boyle with hopes of everlasting fame and wealth through singing are the ones doing her damage. Those who cheer her more for the “ugly duckling with the pipes of gold” sideshow rather than simply enjoying her operatic renditions of theater favorites are the ones who will ruin her.

She may soon be wealthy, but anyone who was watched this woman’s reaction to fame and defeat knows that continued celebrity would be the worst thing for her. If those around her truly love her, they would stop the circus Boyle’s life is about to become.

Today scares me because it is the day that Boyle’s debut album, “I Dreamed A Dream,” is released. Once it’s out there it’s a no-win gambit for the dowdy Ms. Boyle as well as the rest of us.

If it doesn’t sell, than it reaffirms what we all secretly already know: You have to be talented and beautiful to make it in entertainment today. And this woman who just wanted a chance to sing for a national audience will instead be humiliated on a world stage.

What frightens me more is that those who have been following her plain-Jane-to-pop-princess rise over the last year are actually ready to go out and buy this album by the handfuls.

I’m disheartened that a week from now “I Dreamed A Dream” may be at the top of the Billboard 200 album charts in the U.S. and that it will be like a Boyle-ized version of Beatlemania in the U.K. If this happens than Simon Cowell truly does own power of persuasion over us all.

Mostly, I’m heartbroken about what celebrity will do to this simple Scottish woman’s life.

Last April, Boyle, 48, mesmerized a crowd of 10 million viewers watching a first-round episode of Britain’s Got Talent (producer and judge Cowell’s British version of American Idol) with an octave-arcing rendition of “I Dreamed A Dream” from Les Miserable.

She made it through to the semi-finals and was the favorite to win the contest after receiving the most votes from the public, despite continued debate about her frumpy appearance.

Boyle came in second to an already forgotten dance crew called Diversity, but it was the reason she lost that was most troubling. Despite clearly having the most talent in Britain on that night, it was the more marketable, pretty youngsters that won the prize.

“I know what they were thinking, but why should it matter as long as I can sing? It’s not a beauty contest,” Boyle bravely told The Sunday Times.

The day after the final, Boyle was admitted into a psychiatric clinic and remained there for five days. The official diagnosis was exhaustion but rumors about her strange behavior had been swirling behind the scenes of the show. Even the normally callous Cowell seemed concerned.

Her best chance to live a happy, healthy life from this point forward is for this album to quietly fade from the public eye and for her to resume her anonymous life in the family home in Scotland with her cat, Pebbles. She should continue to visit the elderly as a volunteer at her church and if she wants to sing, grace those older folks with a beautiful rendition of “I Dreamed A Dream” that they will never forget.

That is the audience that will love Susan Boyle simply for being Susan Boyle. That is the audience she needs.

The Down-Lo(ad)

It wasn’t so long ago that if you told me that National Public Radio would be the place that I tuned to each week for the best in new, eclectic music I would have guffawed.

NPR? Isn’t that the media conglomerate that serves the people by having really monotone voices talk about important international events (that most of us don’t understand) in between pledge drives? Yes, it is true, but obviously they moved past the valedictorians and went right for the “cool kids” to staff the music Web site.

In addition to interviews with artists, reviews of albums and general daily music news, the site features an impressive archive of first-listen albums, recently taped concerts by bands like R.E.M., Dead Weather, Moby and Sonic Youth and a range that moves from hip-hop to classical.

It’s like getting a little bit of South by Southwest each day. Tune in (right now you can hear the new concert album by buzz band Fever Ray for free) and you will look smart when talking about new music to your friends.

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Movie Review

Over-the-top thriller The Housemaid revels in camp, chaos, and excess

Photo courtesy of Lionsgate

Amanda Seyfried and Sydney Sweeney in The Housemaid.

Both Amanda Seyfried (the upcoming The Testament of Ann Lee) and Sydney Sweeney (Christy) are starring in movies with Oscar ambitions this year. By sheer coincidence, the two actors are also co-starring in The Housemaid, a thriller coming out within weeks of their more ambitious works, one that is likely to be seen by many more people than those prestige plays.

Sweeney is given top billing as Millie, a down-on-her-luck ex-convict looking to land any type of job so as not to break her parole. She finds a too-good-to-be-true lifeboat with Nina (Seyfried), who hires her to be a housemaid for her large house on Long Island, where she lives with her husband, Andrew (Brandon Sklenar), and daughter, Cecilia (Indiana Elle).

After a warm interview, Nina almost immediately becomes highly erratic, whipping back-and-forth between happy-go-lucky and rageful. It seems clear that Nina is suffering from mental health issues, as she’ll often accuse Millie of misplacing or stealing items that she didn’t take. Andrew, apparently used to Nina’s tirades, tries to protect Millie from the worst, something that grows increasingly difficult as Nina ups the ante.

Directed by Paul Feig (A Simple Favor) and adapted by Rebecca Sonnenshine from the bestselling book by Freida McFadden, the film is likely the trashiest mainstream movie to come out in 2025. The first half of the movie relies not on story but on moments as Nina embodies the word “hysterical” to an unbelievable extent. The resigned acceptance of the abuse by Millie, as well as the saintly patience of Andrew, make almost every scene laughable, as nobody seems to be acting anywhere close to how a person would normally react to such extreme situations.

The scenes and the performance of Seyfried are so over-the-top, in fact, that it’s clear that the filmmakers are in on the joke. It’s next to impossible not to have a little bit of fun while watching the actors react to outrageous incidents as if nothing is out of the ordinary. The worse Nina acts, the more Millie and Andrew retreat into their chosen roles, and the funnier the film becomes.

Fans of the book will know that the story changes course, eventually turning into a more stereotypical thriller that also has some relatively gnarly visuals to offer. But the trashiness continues, with Sweeney’s, um, assets repeatedly on display in both clothed and unclothed ways. The sex appeal of the R-rated movie makes it an outlier, as recent studio films have shied away from asking their big stars to disrobe completely.

Both Seyfried and Sweeney are far from their Oscar hopeful roles here. Seyfried is given free rein to act as brazenly as she pleases, and she takes full advantage of that ability. Sweeney seems to have been told to be much more reserved, and unfortunately that results in too many wooden line readings. Sklenar continues his breakout streak (It Ends with Us, Drop) with a role that allows him to show more range than either Seyfried or Sweeney.

The Housemaid is an unusual type of movie to be released at a time of year when most films are either those aiming for awards or more family-friendly fare. Despite its many flaws, it’s still an enjoyable watch that features a variety of crazy scenarios not typically seen in movies nowadays.

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The Housemaid is now playing in theaters.

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