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    The Great Outdoors

    Lost and found in the middle of Houston

    Peter Barnes
    Nov 20, 2009 | 2:30 pm
    • Peter ready to ride
      Julie Soefer
    • Sunset at the park

    Flecks of blood started to appear on my sweat-drenched pants as I watched the railroad ties thudding away beneath my bike tires. The thorns I’d wandered through a few minutes earlier and a chain-link fence separated me from the little circle on my GPS I’d been trying to reach for the last hour.

    The quickest way around was along the tracks, and I shot nervous glances behind me to watch for the train I had a bad feeling would send me diving back into the pointy undergrowth.

    While I huffed toward the next crossing, I realized that this was not the way most people spend an afternoon in Memorial Park. About 1/2 mile ahead of me, lithe joggers ran contentedly along the boulevard. Yet there I was, practically in the shadow of the Williams Tower, having an outdoor adventure in the heart of Texas’ largest city.

    A curiosity about geocaching and a few dumb turns may have led me to that particular place and time, but something more universal made me enjoy it—the simple pleasures in being outside and experiencing something new.

    Whether it’s an afternoon exploring the Hill Country vineyards, a historic audio tour of downtown Houston or a few mauls at a pick-up rugby game, I’d like to fill this space with a new way each week to get out of our city’s legendary air conditioning and do something worthwhile outdoors.

    Take geocaching. Following an impulse buy at REI, I turned to this quirky hobby to break in my new GPS. It seemed straightforward: just enter some coordinates and hunt for a hidden container at that spot. Sites like geocaching.com catalogue thousands of caches all over the world, ranked by terrain and difficulty.

    “I go to see the location, to go to the place, to see someplace new,” says Jim Evans of Clear Lake. Known by the caching alias "Thot," Evans hosts a helpful site for beginners here.

    What the GPS doesn’t tell you, as I found out, is the best way to get to a cache or where to look once you reach the 30-foot circle that marks the limits of your device’s accuracy.

    I set out from my house thinking I could cut through the park, hop across the tracks and make my first find with relative ease. Trying stubbornly to draw a straight line across the handheld’s screen with my movements, I crossed a road-bike track, stumbled onto some excellent mountain biking trails and scrambled across a ravine before finding myself riding down the railroad.

    I made it off the tracks without incident, but by then my new menace was the sun, perilously close to setting while my GPS made threatening beeps to let me know the batteries were running low.

    The hunt led me into the Houston Arboretum and Nature Center, past a lovely set of ponds where lovers chatted on benches. I likely never would have discovered it on my own.

    A bike in one hand, my GPS in the other, I again headed blindly into the bush, pushing through branches, starting to fear that I’d come so far, actually circled this thing at one point, only to have it slip my grasp in the approaching twilight.

    Just as my hopes were starting to fade, I spotted an ammunition can painted green and black beneath a log I was about scramble across. I took a seat, sucked down half a bottle of Gatorade from my pack and opened up the container.

    Inside were old McDonald’s toys, a few pre-Euro French francs, custom coins bearing the marks of other geocachers and a small notebook chronicling the discoveries of those who’d shared in this not-quite-buried treasure before me.

    I hadn’t climbed a mountain or traversed the wilderness, but I still felt like I’d accomplished something as I wandered back to the road.

    As the sun set, I cruised on home along Memorial Drive tired and happy, just in time to see the train barrel past at full speed.

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    Movie Review

    Over-the-top thriller The Housemaid revels in camp, chaos, and excess

    Alex Bentley
    Dec 22, 2025 | 6:00 am
    Amanda Seyfried and Sydney Sweeney in The Housemaid
    Photo courtesy of Lionsgate
    Amanda Seyfried and Sydney Sweeney in The Housemaid.

    Both Amanda Seyfried (the upcoming The Testament of Ann Lee) and Sydney Sweeney (Christy) are starring in movies with Oscar ambitions this year. By sheer coincidence, the two actors are also co-starring in The Housemaid, a thriller coming out within weeks of their more ambitious works, one that is likely to be seen by many more people than those prestige plays.

    Sweeney is given top billing as Millie, a down-on-her-luck ex-convict looking to land any type of job so as not to break her parole. She finds a too-good-to-be-true lifeboat with Nina (Seyfried), who hires her to be a housemaid for her large house on Long Island, where she lives with her husband, Andrew (Brandon Sklenar), and daughter, Cecilia (Indiana Elle).

    After a warm interview, Nina almost immediately becomes highly erratic, whipping back-and-forth between happy-go-lucky and rageful. It seems clear that Nina is suffering from mental health issues, as she’ll often accuse Millie of misplacing or stealing items that she didn’t take. Andrew, apparently used to Nina’s tirades, tries to protect Millie from the worst, something that grows increasingly difficult as Nina ups the ante.

    Directed by Paul Feig (A Simple Favor) and adapted by Rebecca Sonnenshine from the bestselling book by Freida McFadden, the film is likely the trashiest mainstream movie to come out in 2025. The first half of the movie relies not on story but on moments as Nina embodies the word “hysterical” to an unbelievable extent. The resigned acceptance of the abuse by Millie, as well as the saintly patience of Andrew, make almost every scene laughable, as nobody seems to be acting anywhere close to how a person would normally react to such extreme situations.

    The scenes and the performance of Seyfried are so over-the-top, in fact, that it’s clear that the filmmakers are in on the joke. It’s next to impossible not to have a little bit of fun while watching the actors react to outrageous incidents as if nothing is out of the ordinary. The worse Nina acts, the more Millie and Andrew retreat into their chosen roles, and the funnier the film becomes.

    Fans of the book will know that the story changes course, eventually turning into a more stereotypical thriller that also has some relatively gnarly visuals to offer. But the trashiness continues, with Sweeney’s, um, assets repeatedly on display in both clothed and unclothed ways. The sex appeal of the R-rated movie makes it an outlier, as recent studio films have shied away from asking their big stars to disrobe completely.

    Both Seyfried and Sweeney are far from their Oscar hopeful roles here. Seyfried is given free rein to act as brazenly as she pleases, and she takes full advantage of that ability. Sweeney seems to have been told to be much more reserved, and unfortunately that results in too many wooden line readings. Sklenar continues his breakout streak (It Ends with Us, Drop) with a role that allows him to show more range than either Seyfried or Sweeney.

    The Housemaid is an unusual type of movie to be released at a time of year when most films are either those aiming for awards or more family-friendly fare. Despite its many flaws, it’s still an enjoyable watch that features a variety of crazy scenarios not typically seen in movies nowadays.

    ---

    The Housemaid is now playing in theaters.

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