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    Too big a risk for little reward

    Failing Coaching 101: Gary Kubiak puts Houston Texans' season at risk with AndreJohnson plan

    Chris Baldwin
    Aug 22, 2010 | 3:32 am
    • Why is Andre Johnson playing in the second quarter of a preseason game?
    • Is Houston Texans coach Gary Kubiak already losing his mind in the preseason?
    • Matt Schaub has his timing down with Andre Johnson, thank you very much.

    If one thing is apparent from the New Orleans Saints' wipeout of the Houston Texans Saturday night, it's that Matt Schaub and Andre Johnson are still going to need to be the Phoenix Suns of the NFL, a team that wears out foes with its offense.

    This is one preseason game that was actually arguably even worse than the 38-20 final score, considering that the Texans played their starters much longer than the Saints played their first teamers and still wobbled into halftime trailing 28-10. Unfortunately, no NFL team gets to face Matt Leinart every week.

    The Texans' defense isn't as bad as it showed in the Superdome against the defending Super Bowl champs' second string, but it's not nearly as good as the stats from the last few months of the 2009 season say either. Gary Kubiak's team is still very offense dependent. Which makes what the coach is doing with Andre Johnson even more baffling.

    Forget Reggie Bush running through the Texans' defense like he was trying to shed Kim Kardashian all over again. Forget the 52-yard field goal that Neil Rackers knocked in off the upright, and the way Kris Brown actually responded to the pressure by hitting a 43-yarder later. The most striking scene from this game was Andre Johnson getting up gingerly after a mid second-quarter hit from the Saints superstar killer Tracy Porter.

    It's a sight that begged the question: Why is Kubiak playing the best receiver in the NFL — this is what the Texans themselves tout Johnson as at every opportunity — that far into a preseason game?

    It doesn't matter that Johnson appears to be all right, the mere fact that he's exposed to such risk is near lunacy. Is Kubiak trying to make Johnson earn that big new contract in the games that don't count?

    What is the best receiver in the NFL going to learn in the second quarter of a preseason game? Does Kubiak really believe that Schaub and Johnson need to work on their timing? Johnson caught 101 passes for 1,569 yards and nine touchdowns last season, racked up 115 receptions for another 1,500-plus yards and eight touchdowns in 2008 (being noticeably more dangerous in the games Schaub played in '08). This duo is good.

    They don't need to be treated like they're two-bit actors getting auditioned by James Cameron.

    Let Schaub work on his connection with Jacoby Jones and Kevin Water if Kubiak must (though you can also argue that Schaub should have been gone just as quickly as Drew Brees was in this game), just keep Andre on the sideline.

    When you've already proven you're one of the top players in the league at your position, you don't need to be exposed to preseason punishment.

    Even Wayne Fontes — one of the most ridiculed coaches in NFL history — knew enough to not play Barry Sanders more than a few preseason snaps in Barry's prime. The Cowboys took the same approach with Emmitt Smith and Michael Irvin.

    Yes, the NFL's shifted toward playing stars more in the preseason in recent years, but that doesn't make Kubiak's choice to put the Texans' entire season on the line by throwing Johnson needlessly into harm's way any more intelligent.

    Is this a little thing? Maybe — until Johnson gets hurt. But it's one of the many little things that put Kubiak's grasp of big picture coaching into question.

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    Movie Review

    Final Destination: Bloodlines reboots cult favorite horror franchise

    Alex Bentley
    May 15, 2025 | 4:30 pm
    Kaitlyn Santa Juana in Final Destination: Bloodlines
    Photo by Eric Milner
    Kaitlyn Santa Juana in Final Destination: Bloodlines.

    On the surface, the Final Destination films really shouldn’t work. There is no villain other than the concept of death itself, and nearly every death that occurs is foreshadowed so heavily that it removes the normal suspense that comes in horror films. And yet the franchise was successful enough to spawn five films over 11 years in the early 2000s, and now a reboot, Final Destination: Bloodlines.

    A fantastic opening sequence set in the 1960s sets both the tone and the plot of the film, in which Stefani (Kaitlyn Santa Juana) has a recurring nightmare about a disaster that her grandmother, Iris (Gabrielle Rose), helped to avert. A visit to the reclusive Iris convinces Stefani that she and her family should not exist, and that each one of them is destined to meet a grisly end in the near future.

    Met with resistance from her family members, Kaitlyn is unsurprisingly proven right as the film goes along, with different people dying in a variety of bizarre ways. A visit to William Bludworth (the late Tony Todd), a mortician who’s been the one constant in the series, provides a glimmer of hope that they can cheat death. But will they figure it out before it’s too late?

    Directed by Zach Lipovsky and Adam B. Stein, and written by Guy Busick and Lori Evans Taylor, the film does not try to reinvent the wheel for the concept. The entire point is to get as creative as possible with the death scenes, and the filmmakers take that mandate seriously, with each successive death becoming increasingly gruesome. The Rube Goldberg-like manner in which each death occurs makes the scenes come off as entertaining instead of off-putting.

    The idea of Death hunting down an entire family line due to the actions of the family elder is a solid twist on the series’ central premise, and that change keeps the film from feeling repetitive. The story also introduces the possibility that the entire series is connected due to Iris’ actions, with the character possessing a scrapbook that references well-known incidents from previous films, a fun Easter egg for longtime fans.

    The creativity of the kill sequences does not carry over to the overall story, though. Almost every character in the film only exists in order to meet a horrific end, so anything that they have going on outside of being stalked by Death is purely window dressing. Consequently, it’s hard to really care about anybody, even if they are all related to one another.

    Because characters are so easily dispatched in the film, the cast is devoid of well-known actors. This is by far Santa Juana’s biggest role to date, and she does well enough to want to see more of her in the future. Adults like Alex Zahara and Rya Kihlstedt are character actors who bring some history with them, while the younger group is composed of people still trying to make names for themselves.

    Final Destination: Bloodlines is a solid return for the franchise, even if it feels more like a one-off film rather than a justification for more stories in the future. But given how easily the concept can be adapted into new circumstances, don’t be surprised if another movie pops up in a couple of years.

    ---

    Final Destination: Bloodlines opens in theaters on May 16.

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