Kiim K's gon' get you drunk
Kim Kardashian's wedding extravaganza: You know and we know you're watching;here's how to make it livable
There's no use pretending. Whether live as it unfolds or when you're stuck in a waiting room or home sick, somewhere, someday, you will be watching the two-hour wedding extravaganza special that is the marriage between reality star Kim Kardashian and mediocre NBA player Kris Humphries.
You will make a conscious effort to Tivo it, or you will wish you were unconscious. Either way, we've devised a method of making Kim's big day your best day.
What follows is the proprietary CultureMap Kim Kardashian dream wedding extravaganzapalooza drinking game:
Every time there is a K monogram - take one sip
Every time they pan to kris penner crying -
if kim's makeup runs at all - chug your drink
every time khloe says something disgusting or inappropriate
every time kourtney . . .
every time scott embarrasses the family
every time bruce looks like he wishes he had made a different life choice
every non-human in the ceremony take three drinks
if there are pyrotechnics, take 5
if they fail in some way, chug
drink every time anyone switches outfits.
if it's at all mentioned that it's not kim's first wedding, finish your beer