Roommate drama
Houston's Weatherman strums out, but The Bachelor Pad is all about women'srevenge
Take 19 hot singles living together in a house and you've already got some classic must-see TV. Add in dating element and $250,000 at stake and you've got a social experiment for sex, love, strategy, deceit and drama.
So yes, I already love The Bachelor Pad.
After the drawn out welcome to the house, the roommates learned that dating each other could both be the path to safety (by earning a no-elimination rose on a date) and cause for kicking someone out.
The first to learn this were Juan, who pulled a hit-and-run on Nikki for a free place to stay in Chicago, and Jesse Kovacs, who learned that a female friend you hook up with regularly might think of herself as your girlfriend — and that if you make her cry by telling her you want to be free to date other girls in the house, her friends just might vote you out.
Yes, The Bachelor Pad rights the wrongs bad men perpetrate on their girls. Cue Elizabeth (who seems to be naturally manipulative and thus a competitor to watch) warning Jesse he needs to love her or else. "There are some girls that like me ... if you treat me poorly, it could have negative consequences on you."
Now that is how the game is played, my friends.
Craig M. learned that being the villain is not the best strategy in what's essentially a popularity contest, but he foiled the women's plan to evict him early by winning the challenge — a soft-core porn game of Twister, conveniently staged with contestants in bathing suits. (You stay classy, ABC!)
If being a bad boyfriend is the cardinal sin for the men in the house, bringing drama is dangerous behavior for the women. And in this, no one can possibly compete with Michelle. After a rumor started that Michelle hooked up with rose-wielder Craig, and she wasn't picked for the date, Michelle's crazy eyes seemed to go off.
"I became VERY UPSET," she said in the voiceover, sounding like an evil version of The Hulk. "I want her to know how upset I feel about it.
Her response? To follow Tenley (the alleged source of the gossip) into the bathroom, trap her inside and give her a verbal dose of the crazy.
The choice for eviction and subsequent rose ceremony was predictably long and boring. In the end Juan and Michelle got their long rides in the limo of poverty and loneliness. Frankly, I can't wait until next week when the alliances begin to form more fully and the roommates get a little more friendly.
As for Houston's Weatherman, Jonathan Novack? He kept mostly out of the drama this week, but played out the episode on guitar while Natile sang an improvised song about ... The Weatherman.