Better With Time

Grown up boy bands bring out fine Houston women to gawk at Donnie Wahlberg's hotbod

Photo by Jayme Lamm
Donnie Wahlberg
A fan shows true allegiance
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm
Photo by Jayme Lamm

I was 8 when I went to my first concert, which just so happened to be New Kids on the Block. I was 8 ½ for my second one, which coincidentally was also NKOTB. Of course I went with my mother who accompanied me pretty much everywhere at the time.

I think she single-handedly prevented one of the guys from falling in love with me back then, but I kind of let it go. Even at that young age, I knew the magnitude of the craziness that I was willingly walking into (and spending my allowance on) at the Hampton Coliseum.

Nearly two decades later I found myself walking into the Toyota Center Saturday night to relive my youth at the New Kids on the Block and Backstreet Boys concert. This time, instead of my mom by my side, I had my wacky friend Beth adorned in her I heart Joey T-shirt. Whether you call it classic, vintage, or just too good to let go, the T-shirt was a sure-fire hit with the other crazed fans.

Wondering how the concert was set up, I asked tour manager assistant, Katharina Gauss how it worked. Does New Kids on the Block go on stage first and then Backstreet Boys or vice versa?

“No, they go on together. They share the stage. Like the ‘B’ in NKOTBSB,” she informed me. For a minute I was confused. I wanted to blame it on the whiskey, but it was probably my school-girlish excitement that prevented me from such concentration.

I guess I forgot the valuable years that separated the two groups thinking at one time they were boy-band rivals, but alas, I was confusing my Jordan Knight crush with my Justin Timberlake and 'N Sync crush. Of course NKOTB and BSB could share a stage. And the “B”.

Donnie dominates. It should be criminal for a 41-year-old to have a body like that.

It’s funny how things change just like your parents and all the other adults warned they would. Growing up, I was in awe of (OK, obsessed with) with Jordan Knight. Out of all the New Kids, he was by far my favorite.

And of course the one I knew I had a chance with. We had so much in common — he was the youngest of six kids, and I was an only child. He was born in May and I in November. At the age of 8 nothing really made sense, but I knew I loved him with my whole heart. I even told TJ Waller, my real-life boyfriend at the time that I could no longer be his girl. It didn’t feel right, what I was doing to Jordan, so I ended it with TJ immediately.

But now … well now, I’ve grown up. I realized I had absolutely nothing in common with Knight. And while on paper it may have sounded like a match made in heaven, in my heart I knew it was never going to amount to anything.

And besides, I’ve moved on. TO DONNIE WAHLBERG! The man is hawt. And not just on stage at a concert — I fell in love with him in my new favorite show Blue Bloods. He plays Danny Reagan, a sexy detective who happens to solve every single crime in all of NY.

On stage (and in my heart), Donnie Wahlberg dominates. It should be criminal for a 41-year-old to have a body like that. Ripping off his tried and true Paul Pierce Celtics jersey for the last act was almost too much for this now legal girl fan to handle. I tried to think back and recall if any of the guys ripped their shirts off when I was 8, but sadly, I couldn’t recall. I even called my mom to see if she remembered, but no such luck.

See the difference (and I’m sure both NKOTB and BSB can vouch for this) is that if they did rip their shirts off back in the day, we were only screaming for two reasons. Either they were about to throw an article of clothing into the crowd that if we were lucky enough to snag would give us the right to brag until the end of the school year about having or we were so young — and young girls scream at anything and everything.

Ripping their clothes off today means only one thing — we can appreciate those manly, sweaty bodies that we now longed for — in a different way than when we were 8 of course.

The guys put on a damn good show. Filling the the Toyota Center to 98 percent capacity was much more than most Houston Rockets games did the past few seasons. Making girls of almost every age swoon and bring out the bright magic markers and poster board for their I heart NKOTBSB signs was another notable factor. When’s the last time you saw a hot girl in sequins and hair scrunchies hold up a I heart Chase Budinger sign?

Dear Donnie, Danny, Joe, Jordan, Jon, Nick, AJ, Brian and Howie,

Quit playing games with my heart. I’ll be loving you forever.

Sincerely, every girl in Houston.

unspecified

Movie Review

Daniel Craig shines in Queer, an unapologetic tale of love and loss

Photo courtesy of A24

Drew Starkey and Daniel Craig in Queer.

As recently as the late 2010s, if a movie was made about an LGBTQ+ character, it was more than likely about their coming out experience. Romance, if it existed, was typically chaste, and actual sex was almost completely out of the question. Things have changed dramatically in the 2020s, to the point that a major movie star has no issue starring in a film called Queer.

Based on the 1985 novella by William S. Burroughs, the film features William Lee (Daniel Craig), whom everyone calls just Lee, a writer living in 1950s-era Mexico City who spends most of his time haunting local bars with friends like fellow writer Joe Guidry (Jason Schwartzman) and hitting on younger men. His early interactions in the film seem to indicate that Lee has a bad reputation within the local gay community, as multiple people avoid him or give him odd looks.

Lee senses an opportunity when he encounters a newcomer, Eugene Allerton (Drew Starkey). Despite some awkward interactions, the two of them start spending time together, although Lee has much more invested in the relationship than Eugene does. Their hit-and-miss bond continues until Lee, who’s starting to get into drugs in addition to the booze, convinces Eugene to accompany him on a trip to South America.

Directed by Luca Guadagnino and written by Justin Kuritzkes (making their second straight film together after Challengers), early on the film seems to be mostly about the divide between an older person who’s grown comfortable in his ways and a younger person who’s living a relatively carefree life. The introduction of drugs into the plot changes things, though, with Lee searching out more ways to open his eyes to what the world has to offer.

Guadagnino and his team use some interesting visual storytelling techniques to introduce ideas that may not be present in the actual script. The most successful, demonstrated in multiple scenes, is the superimposition of movements by Lee over what’s actually taking place in the scene. The subtle overlay gives the audience insight into Lee’s true feelings, showing what he can’t or won’t say out loud.

Music also plays a big part in how the plot is perceived, with the use of anachronistic songs from Nirvana and Prince serving to heighten certain moments. The score by Trent Reznor and Atticus Ross is not as in-your-face as the one they did for Challengers, but it complements the film well, especially when the plot starts to get trippy in its final half hour.

Craig, who appears sweaty and disheveled for much of the film, is about as far from the suaveness of James Bond as you can get in this role. He takes multiple risks with his performance and almost all of them pay off. Starkey’s character is subdued by comparison, but still comes off well. Schwartzman and Lesley Manville are given showy roles, with both using altered appearances that make them nearly unrecognizable to deliver memorable performances.

Queer is not as accessible as Challengers was storytelling-wise, but the fact that it tells a story about gay men living their lives as they see fit with no interference or questions shows how far the film world has come in a short period of time. It also continues Guadagnino’s streak of making audacious films in a way that few other filmmakers are willing or able to approach.

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Queer is now playing in theaters.

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