Kalon Joseph Reid McMahon adheres to Frank Sinatra's motto: "You only liveonce...but if you live like me, once is enough."
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Is a helicopter McMahon's preferred mode of transportation?
Cinched at the Waist
The eighth season of ABC's The Bachelorette doesn't premiere until Monday night, but Houston's Kalon Joseph Reid McMahon is already shaping up as the show's villain.
In a recently-released preview that shows a Dolly Parton cameo, lots of French kissing and a fair amount of tearful drama, McMahon seems to rub everyone the wrong way — including the bachelorette herself, Southern beauty and Bachelor veteran Emily Maynard. (CultureMap's Shelby Hodge first broke the story of McMahon appearing on The Bachelorette, of course.)
"When he arrives — via helicopter! — the hissing and sniping begin. Finally, some life!"
And here we were, hoping that the founder of now-defunct members-only club, Dorsia, would provide the same brand of comic relief that H-Town reality princess Erica Rose trademarked. Or, at the very least, represent Houston well.
We may take solace in the fact that McMahon brings some entertaining pretension to what Us Weekly deemed a "blandly familiar mix of goofs and nice guys."
"Thank goodness for Texas brand consultant Kalon, a competitive show-off who's more into himself," wrote the magazine in advance of the season premiere.
"When he arrives — via helicopter! — the hissing and sniping begin. Finally, some life!"
Tune in on Mondays at 8:30 p.m. to watch McMahon stroke his ego while attempting to win the heart of Maynard.
The story of Dr. Frankenstein and his monster is now over 200 years old, with Mary Shelley’s book having been adapted or referenced in close to 500 films. Less common is the character of The Bride of Frankenstein, which existed in the original text but has more often than not been excised in adaptations. Writer/director Maggie Gyllenhaal has tried to rectify that by giving the character a big showcase in her new film, The Bride!.
Gyllenhaal has reimagined the story as one in which a woman named Ida (Jessie Buckley) becomes possessed by the spirit of Shelley (also Buckley). At the same time, the already-existing Frankenstein’s monster (Christian Bale) approaches Dr. Euphronius (Annette Bening), who specializes in reanimation, with the request to make him a wife. When Ida falls to her death in an “accident” involving her boyfriend (John Magaro), the ideal corpse becomes available.
After Ida’s resurrection, she and the monster become restless being studied by Dr. Euphronius and decide to break out to experience the world. The world, naturally, is not exactly welcoming to them, and soon the couple are on the run for causing mayhem, including a few murders. In hot pursuit are detective Jake Wiles (Peter Sarsgaard) and his assistant, Myrna Mallow (Penélope Cruz), as well as other authorities.
It’s clear that Gyllenhaal wanted to merge the Frankenstein story with Bonnie & Clyde, especially since she sets the film in the mid-1930s. And that wouldn’t have been a bad idea if having the monster and The Bride going on a crime spree was truly the focus of the movie. But most of the time there’s less intentionality in their misdeeds and more confusion, leading to a muddled plot with no clear direction or end goal in mind.
One of the biggest problems is that Gyllenhaal starts the energy of the film at an 11, giving her and everyone else nowhere to go but down. She dabbles in multiple different tones, at times going the straight drama route and other times making what seems like full-on camp. At one point, she even has the monster and the Bride in a dance sequence set to “Puttin’ on the Ritz,” which would be hilarious as an homage to Young Frankenstein if the film weren’t so disjointed.
Most baffling of all is what Gyllenhaal wants from The Bride character. She morphs multiple times over the course of the film, from close to unintelligible at the beginning to rough-and-tumble at the end. There are hints at the lack of control she has over her autonomy, including Shelley’s possession of her and the monster lying to her about her past, but any commentary that Gyllenhaal might be trying to make gets lost amid the oddity of the film as a whole.
Both Buckley and Bale are all-in for their performances, which definitely fall in the “love it or hate it” dichotomy. Each scene is pitched so high that there’s little nuance to either of them, and neither is on par with their previous Oscar-caliber roles. The high-powered supporting cast of Bening, Sarsgaard, Cruz, and Jake Gyllenhaal is watchable based on previous roles, but none of them elevate this particular movie.
Whatever intentions Maggie Gyllenhaal had in making The Bride! are only halfway legible in a film that can never find its tonal footing. There has rarely been subtlety in movies featuring Frankenstein’s monster and related characters, but this one makes all the others seem like stuffy dramas in comparison.