THE BLONDE IS BACK

Jessica Simpson grows up (sorta) with The Price of Beauty

It was way back in 2003 when Jessica Simpson first became a household name with such pearls of wisdom as thinking buffalo wings were made of buffalo and not knowing the difference between chicken and tuna on Newlyweds: Nick & Jessica.

And while her turn as one of the decade's most high-profile ditzy blondes earned her millions in album sales, movie roles and countless magazine covers, it also made her a tabloid target ready for backlash. After years at the top of the A-list, Jessica's career stumbled, and recently she's been famous more for her high-profile relationships and supposed weight battles than any of her own projects.

What a difference seven years makes.

Older — she's now pushing 30 — and demonstrably wiser, she's going back to reality TV with The Price of Beauty. It's a brilliant vehicle for her: partly a travelogue to exotic global destinations — France, Japan, Morocco, Thailand and more — and partly a sincere exploration into the cultural concept of beauty and what women go through around the world to feel beautiful.

There are still plenty of Newlywed-isms. In tonight's premiere episode, set in Thailand, Simpson compares an elephant's hair to a "scrotum" and gets a bad case of the church giggles about 40 minutes into a Buddhist meditation set.

Dropping a blonde around the world to see what dumb things she does has been tried before (think Taradise and Bridget's Sexiest Beaches), without much success. Simpson succeeds because of her natural likeability, and seems more ready to make fun of herself than to be just a punchline. In her commentary after she's been twisted and tossed around like a rag doll in a traditional Thai massage, the Newlyweds Jessica might have said something along the lines of "I thought? Thai massages? Had like, a happy ending?"

But now she can express the same joke with more confidence: "I thought Thai massages had happy endings. And now I'm wondering where mine is!"

While most of the show is watching Jessica and her friends Ken Paves and CaCee Cobb react to weird things the producers put in their path (Thailand offered a snack of fried grasshoppers in addition to elephants and Buddhist monks), Simpson seems sincere in wanting to learn about how different cultures perceive beauty. She is introduced to a Thai woman whose face is disfigured from creams meant to lighten skin to acheive the Thai ideal of paleness, and is visibly upset by the woman's story.

She also travels to remote northern Thailand to talk to a tribe of women who elongate their necks by wearing brass coils starting around the age of five.

There's an easy tendency to cast judgements on these foreign beauty practices, but the show seems more interested in a balance of celebrating the different and interesting traditions while showing that the dangerous lengths women go to achieve the beauty ideal. After all, while I might not be lining up to have coiled brass rings stretch my neck, is it any crazier or more dangerous than high heels or injecting poison into our foreheads?

As for other adventures, an episode in the French fashion world seems to bring out Simpson's every insecurity, and another in India introduces a little girl with a cleft palate getting a new smile, a somewhat tangential issue that comes in because Simpson has been an ambassador for Operation Smile since 2003. It seems like Simpson is determined to become a role model again — this time for all the right reasons.

While the ditzy blonde was never really my cup of tea, I kinda adore the new Jessica Simpson.

Still a silly, loud-mouthed and undeniably gorgeous Texas girl, she's learned from her experiences and grown into a woman who has an interesting perspective on the cult of beauty, and who wants to know and explore more about the world.

The Price of Beauty airs on Vh1 Mondays at 9 p.m. Central Time, starting tonight.

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Movie Review

Margot Robbie ignites provocative new take on Wuthering Heights

Photo courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures

Jacob Elordi and Margot Robbie in Wuthering Heights.

Emily Brontë’s 1847 novel Wuthering Heights is one of those classic books assigned in high school English classes, and it has received a number of film adaptations over the years — each of which differ in numerous ways from the source material. Purists won’t receive any reprieve from Emerald Fennell’s 2026 adaptation, with a title that is stylized as "Wuthering Heights” for good reason.

Cathy (played as an adult by Margot Robbie) and Heathcliff (Jacob Elordi) have known each other their entire lives, with Cathy’s alcoholic and inveterate gambler father (Martin Clunes) taking in Heathcliff on a whim when he was a boy. The two bond as they grow up together, although Cathy always seems to have an eye on moving up in society from their relatively impoverished lifestyle.

Cathy finally gets her wish when the rich Linton familyled by Edgar (Shazad Latif), moves in down the road, Despite discovering she has feelings for the now grown-up Heathcliff, Cathy sees Edgar as her way out and agrees to marry him. A scorned Heathcliff flees, returning years later as mysteriously wealthy. His reappearance ignites something in Cathy’s soul, and the two engage in a perhaps unwise affair.

Fennell (Promising Young Woman, Saltburn) infuses the dusty material with an energy that’s not typically present in stories set in this particular time and place. Aside from the occasional Charli XCX song (the singer created a whole concept album for the film), the film looks and feels like a period piece, albeit one that doesn’t get bogged down in the drudgery that can sometimes come from films set in the distant past.

Much of that has to do with the lust the filmmaker puts into the story. Even if you’re not familiar with Brontë’s book, you can rest assured that Fennell has strayed far from the text, giving Cathy and Heathcliff thoughts and actions unthinkable in the 19th century. Fennell plays with expectations by opening the film with audio featuring creaking noises and a man grunting, conjuring up a situation far different than what is actually happening, and she also makes liberal use of rain, sweat, and tears to make the actors enticing.

What she can’t do, however, is make the two lead characters compelling. Cathy is a striver who never seems to know what she wants out of life, and Heathcliff goes from a bore to a brute over the course of the film, with no clear indication that he likes anybody, much less Cathy. Anyone expecting some kind of grand romance will be disappointed as Fennell is much more interested in making the film weird, like having the walls of Cathy’s room look like her skin, complete with freckles.

Robbie and Elordi do well enough with the material, and it’s clear that both of them are committed to bringing Fennell’s vision to life. Their styles tend to balance each other out, and if the story had been committed to their characters’ relationship, they might be lauded for their chemistry. In the end, though, the supporting actors feel more interesting, including ones played by Hong Chau, Alison Miller, and Clunes.

This version of Wuthering Heights should never be construed as an alternative to reading the book for any high schoolers out there. While Fennell makes the film interesting with her technical filmmaking choices, the story never finds its footing as it fails to sell the one thing that it seems to promise.

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Wuthering Heights opens in theaters on February 13.

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