Idol Insider

Space City doesn't exactly rock: Many of Houston's American Idol auditions areout of this world bad

Baylie Brown is back on "American Idol," trying her luck five seasons later.
On a night when Houston didn't exactly wow, Lakewood Church worship leaderRamiro Garcia brought a needed bright spot.
Who would have guessed that Jennifer Lopez would become the voice of reason on"American Idol."
Photo by Matt Sayles/AP

In its 11 seasons, American Idol’s dropped by the Lone Star State a whopping nine times, including the Dallas cattle call that propelled the show to fame. But its recent stop in Houston (shown Thursday night) proved a little less successful — a mixed bag of sorts.

In a nod to Space City, Commander Dan C. Burbank “launched” the episode more than 250 miles above Earth, and with that, we were off with the good, the bad and the intolerable.

The episode felt oddly vintage in some ways, like a throwback to circa Season Three when ridiculously delusional people with bad accents were a novelty. See first contestant Phong Vu, a 25-year-old Houston-native who says it’s “phenomenon” to be able to audition.

When the judges tell him no, he gets on his knees and argues that he’s “heard worse" . . . and he’s quickly escorted out by a security guard.

He delivers a painful “Unbreak My Heart” with even more painful conviction, and then tries to woo the judges with his “iconic moves.” Dear Nigel: This is 2012. Let’s move on.

The jab at Houston proceeds with a string of similar auditions, from flamboyant renditions of “My Prerogative” and “I’m So Excited,” to wannabe ~~Josh Turner~~ Scotty McCreery covers of “Just to be Your Man.”

But then, enter Skyler Laine, a country girl who shoots deer and whose adorable family owns a hole-in-the-wall restaurant in downtown Mississippi. Before she sings a single note, I write in my notes: “Looks and sounds like Miranda Lambert.” And alas, the 17-year-old whips out “Hell On Heels” by Lambert’s side project, The Pistol Annies (if you don’t have their album, run, don’t walk, to get it).

She’s got flair, chops and authenticity, and with my favorite audition thus far, the judges send her through. Sadly, she ain’t from Texas.

Thankfully, the next contestant is from Texas, 21-year-old Baylie Brown. Idol aficionados will remember her from Season Six, when she was infamously ousted during group round, thanks to memory loss and a clash with two Jersey girls. Simon Cowell told the 16-year-old in her initial audition that her voice would be great in two or three years, and he might be right.

She auditions with more maturity and control this time, wrapping her country-ish voice around Bon Jovi’s “Bed of Roses.” To Hollywood she goes.

So does 28-year-old Kristine Osorio, a hard working soon-to-be single mom who traded in her divorce lawyer cash for a plane ticket from Amarillo to the Idol audition. She sings my favorite Adele song, “One and Only,” with grit and believability, and I can’t wait to hear how her husky tone transforms other songs.

Idol then treats us to a tangible reminder of the disparity between Jennifer Lopez’s worth as a judge and “the others.’’ Much to her dismay, the boys turn down three worthy contenders and shoo in Linda Williams from League City, whose sloppy version of “Fallin’” can’t touch the previous three auditions.

“I honestly feel like somebody slipped you something,“ Jennifer tells Randy, before launching into indignant backlash. Get it, girl.

Alajandro Cazeres “The Revolution” then takes us back to Season Three with another awkwardly bad audition. The Houstonite babbles on about wanting to live in a world where Lady Gaga sells platinum records and Barack Obama is president — further proof he was plucked straight from 2004.

When the judges tell him no, he gets on his knees and argues that he’s “heard worse" . . . and he’s quickly escorted out by a security guard.

And finally, with Jennifer's abs and a few other Season Three-esque auditions sprinkled in between, two memorable contestants knock on Idol’s door. The first is Cortez Shaw, a warehouse worker and college student from Garland who’s been through tough times with his single-parent family.

“American Idol is opportunity at its greatest,” he says, and the idealist inside of me agrees. He spins Adele’s “Someone Like You” into an upbeat ditty, and I kind of dig his note choices. What I don’t dig is his claim that Randy’s his favorite judge — dude, seriously? — but for that I will have to forgive him.

The night ends with Ramiro Garcia, a Lakewood Church worship leader born without ears. Though his parents were told he’d never speak or hear, several surgeries later he’s auditioning with a serviceable if not remarkable take on “Amazing Grace.” There’s sheer passion in his delivery, and his dad notes in broken English that he “Sings on another level — different to this world.”

It’s a touching way to close out Idol’s visit to Space City.

All in all, 56 contestants from the Houston audition will battle it out during Hollywood Week. Sound off on your favorites below.

Quote of the Night

“Don’t sweat the petty things, and don’t pet the sweaty things.”

- Steven Tyler, for reals.

Get more of Tara Seetharam's pop culture musings on her website TaraSeetharam.com and follow her on Twitter @TaraAshley.

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Movie Review

Cookie Queens goes behind the scenes of Girl Scout Cookie season

Photo courtesy of Roadside Attractions

Girl Scouts in Cookie Queens.

Few people are strong enough to resist the lure of Girl Scout cookie season every year, with the cookies’ limited availability and unique flavors a strong incentive to indulge. But only the girls and their families who have sold the cookies know the joys and stresses of trying to get people to buy them, a process that is detailed in the new documentary, Cookie Queens.

The film by documentarian Alysa Nahmias uses the stories of four different girls to represent the nationwide ritual for the Girl Scouts. They include 12-year-old Olive in Charlotte, North Carolina, a longtime top seller; 8-year-old Shannon Elizabeth in El Paso, Texas, who wants to earn the reward of going to camp; 5-year-old Ara in San Diego, California, whose goal is modest compared to most other girls; and 9-year-old Nikki in Chino, California, who has to compete with her older sisters in the cookie-selling bonanza.

The girls represent a cross-section of both ages and backgrounds, with some girls coming from wealthy families and some girls dealing with more limited means. And how much money your family has makes a big difference, as not only does someone richer have more freedom with their time and supplies, but all scouts are required to reimburse the organization for every box they take in, regardless of whether they’re able to sell it or not.

That caveat makes the journeys of the four featured girls feel wildly different. It’s clear from the start that Olive and Nikki’s families don’t give a second thought to the personal economics of selling cookies, with each girl taking in thousands of boxes at the beginning of the six-week selling season. With both Olive and Nikki rightfully confident that they’ll have no problem offloading their supply, their stories turn to how selling is personally affecting them, with each trying to reconcile the fun of doing it with the pressure they feel from their family members.

Shannon Elizabeth’s story is more harrowing, as her parents feel a strong desire to help her accomplish her lofty goal, but worry that the cost might literally be too high for the family as a whole. More than once, the parents are shown fretting that they won’t have the money to pay back what they owe should they fall significantly short in their sales. Their selling approach, which includes walking through an empty swap meet and standing outside a chain restaurant at night, only adds to their stress.

The most fun story to watch is that of Ara, whose innocence is matched by her confidence. Her parents teach her how much money they’ll owe with her small goal of 55 boxes, but right away she takes on more responsibility than expected. She’s shown making sales pitches and tallying the total number of boxes she’s sold with little-to-no help from either her mom or dad. With her high voice, glasses, and a monitor on her arm to manage her diabetes, she becomes the cute and sympathetic part of the film.

There are times that the film starts to feel more than a little manipulative, however. While many of the moments documented come off as organic, some of them seem like Nahmias is actively guiding the participants in order to get a better story. This is especially evident with Shannon Elizabeth and her family, whose early struggles turn into a miraculous feel-good story by the end, a turnaround that seems implausible at best. Everything with them might have been aboveboard, but Nahmias and her team edit the family’s journey in a way that pushes a bit too hard for emotion.

Cookie Queens, which was produced by a company owned by Prince Harry and Meghan Markle, helps to give insight into the business of selling Girl Scout cookies for those who’ve only been on the purchasing end of the transaction. The dedication of each girl toward selling their allotted supply proves fun and interesting, even if the filmmaker tries to gild the lily on occasion.

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Cookie Queens is now playing in theaters,

movies girl scout cookie film