Inside Oprah's Houston Night

Inside Oprah's Houston night: Five secrets she shared, from a Stedman screw up to truffle hunting

Nobody commands a stadium like Oprah Winfrey. Statuesque and poised with her ever-infectious confidence and warmth, Oprah greeted the Houston audience in a floor length vibrant yellow gown at the Toyota Center on Friday night, and attendees did not leave disappointed.

For a stadium that is usually packed shoulder to shoulder with passionate basketball fans and giddy concert groupies, the Toyota Center turned into what can only be described as a middle-aged dance party during the "Oprah's The Life You Want" stop in Houston.

Imparting her signature feel good serum, self-help mantras and quote-worthy wisdoms, Winfrey guided the mostly female audience through the captivating story of how she was born into a poor rural Mississippi home and eventually became a world-renowned television personality.

The Toyota Center turned into what can only be described as a middle-aged dance party during Oprah's stop in Houston.

During the event, the media mogul shared a plethora of interesting and lesser-known facts about her life and work. For those who weren't there to witness the big money show, here are five things we learned about Winfrey:

1. She loves energy

After years of watching the Oprah Winfrey Show, I learned that Winfrey is deeply religious, but I never knew just how spiritual she was until Friday night. If there was one word that was repeated throughout the evening, it was energy. Energy. Energy. Energy.

Paraphrasing Newton's First Law, "Every action has a reaction," Oprah professed that the energy people put out into the world is exactly the energy they receive in return. That those who send out love will receive enrichment, and those who exhibit fear will feel that negativity in return.

2. She still remembers that terrible Texas beef incident

In 1998, Oprah was engulfed in a Texas lawsuit that resembled an episode of Dallas. To explain: In 1996, Winfrey ran a segment on mad cow disease that inspired a group of Texas cattlemen to sue the then talk show host for slandering their meat. The $10.3 million dollar lawsuit dragged on for weeks, but the jury eventually ruled in Winfrey's favor.

"Everything stands outside of you to tell you who you are. Be still and know who you are."

Ironically, Winfrey said those tiring weeks of litigation served as a test of character. Though these cattlemen were saying that Winfrey set out to ruin the beef industry, she knew she had no malicious intent with her words.

"Everything stands outside of you to tell you who you are," she says. "Be still and know who you are."

3. Just like your grandma, Oprah tells the same stories over and over again

If there is one qualm I have with Winfrey, it's her tendency to tell the same stories over again. Case in point: In Houston Winfrey narrated the story of how she auditioned for The Color Purple, realized she wasn't going to be cast in the film, went to a health retreat and surrendered her sadness only to receive a call from Steven Spielberg saying she had been cast in the movie.

I and many others in the audience already know this story since Oprah tells it nearly every chance she gets. Here's the evidence if you don't believe me. Please don't misunderstand me: Her messages are powerful, but I can't help but wonder if she doesn't have something fresh up her sleeve after all these years of life-altering experiences.

4. She loves to cook

As Winfrey put it, she loves to cook when she feels like it, which probably means she cooks only a few times a year. And yet, I can't imagine how fun it would be to sit alongside Winfrey as she prepared for one of her remarkable dinner parties. She even captivated audiences with the story how she once made a stuffed goose for her boyfriend Stedman, but that he showed up too late at night to eat it.

Long story short: Winfrey was mad and Stedman never did it again. Winfrey even detailed her recent truffle hunting trip in Italy that she took with her best friend Gayle King. Just like us, Winfrey loves food.

5. Every Oprah guest seeks acceptance

"We all desire to know we matter and that we are heard," Winfrey says. In all of her years of doing show after show, Winfrey admits that each and every guest — including "Beyonce with all her Beyonce-ness" — asks Winfrey how they did at the conclusion of the segment.

Even Presidents Barack Obama and George W. Bush turned to the host for the thumbs up or thumbs. In truth, it's good to know that even Beyonce seeks the occasional outward approval.

Oprah Winfrey played to the audience in Houston, even if she made it clear she hasn't forgotten the Texas beef incident.

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Movie Review

Meta-comedy remake Anaconda coils itself into an unfunny mess

Photo by Matt Grace

Jack Black and Paul Rudd in Anaconda.

In Hollywood’s never-ending quest to take advantage of existing intellectual property, seemingly no older movie is off limits, even if the original was not well-regarded. That’s certainly the case with 1997’s Anaconda, which is best known for being a lesser entry on the filmography of Ice Cube and Jennifer Lopez, as well as some horrendous accent work by Jon Voight.

The idea behind the new meta-sequel Anaconda is arguably a good one. Four friends — Doug (Jack Black), Griff (Paul Rudd), Claire (Thandiwe Newton), and Kenny (Steve Zahn) — who made homemade movies when they were teenagers decide to remake Anaconda on a shoestring budget. Egged on by Griff, an actor who can’t catch a break, the four of them pull together enough money to fly down to Brazil, hire a boat, and film a script written by Doug.

Naturally, almost nothing goes as planned in the Amazon, including losing their trained snake and running headlong into a criminal enterprise. Soon enough, everything else takes second place to the presence of a giant anaconda that is stalking them and anyone else who crosses its path.

Written and directed by Tom Gormican, with help from co-writer Kevin Etten, the film is designed to be an outrageous comedy peppered with laugh-out-loud moments that cover up the fact that there’s really no story. That would be all well and good … if anything the film had to offer was truly funny. Only a few scenes elicit any honest laughter, and so instead the audience is fed half-baked jokes, a story with no focus, and actors who ham it up to get any kind of reaction.

The biggest problem is that the meta-ness of the film goes too far. None of the core four characters possess any interesting traits, and their blandness is transferred over to the actors playing them. And so even as they face some harrowing situations or ones that could be funny, it’s difficult to care about anything they do since the filmmakers never make the basic effort of making the audience care about them.

It’s weird to say in a movie called Anaconda, but it becomes much too focused on the snake in the second half of the film. If the goal is to be a straight-up comedy, then everything up to and including the snake attacks should be serving that objective. But most of the time the attacks are either random or moments when the characters are already scared, and so any humor that could be mined all but disappears.

Black and Rudd are comedy all-stars who can typically be counted on to elevate even subpar material. That’s not the case here, as each only scores on a few occasions, with Black’s physicality being the funniest thing in the movie. Newton is not a good fit with this type of movie, and she isn’t done any favors by some seriously bad wigs. Zahn used to be the go-to guy for funny sidekicks, but he brings little to the table in this role.

Any attempt at rebooting/remaking an old piece of IP should make a concerted effort to differentiate itself from the original, and in that way, the new Anaconda succeeds. Unfortunately, that’s its only success, as the filmmakers can never find the right balance to turn it into the bawdy comedy they seemed to want.

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Anaconda is now playing in theaters.

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