Romance & rhinestones

Jason Aldean celebrates redneck culture at rambunctious Rodeo concert

Jason Aldean appeared for the fifth consecutive year at RodeoHouston on Tuesday night. I have every reason to believe he will make it back next year for a sixth straight appearance. I have put together a simple 20-step guide on how to enjoy an Aldean show when he inevitably returns, based on my observations from this year's rambunctious show.

Step One: Put a ton of thought into your wardrobe

This is not going to be a country music concert as much as it's going to be a celebration of redneck culture, amplified. Men; neon plaid pearl snaps or -shirts with eagles and bulls are acceptable, but please keep them tucked into your Wranglers. Ladies, your jean pockets MUST contain rhinestones. The more flair, the more rodeo cred. Also acceptable are boots worn with dresses, cut off shorts with pockets that extend past the shorts themselves, and plaid.

Step Two: Take the light rail

Riding the rail to and from RodeoHouston will ensure that you maximize your people-watching potential, and the Ensemble/HCC station is within walking distance from some lively after-rodeo bars and of course the Continental Club.

Step Two: Get some carnival food

After getting off at Reliant Park station, take a stroll through the carnival before stopping for pierogi at Polinia's booth. In fact, get the combo with the cabbage roll and sausage. It's a great deal, and you've got a long night of country amp-rock ahead of you.

Step Four (for beer lovers): Get crafty

Once inside Reliant Stadium, don't go for the deceptive Third Shift/Blue Moon psuedo-craft beer oases throughout the concourse. If you're willing to walk all the way to the south end zone, there is Karbach and St. Arnold. Get it, and go grab a seat.

Step Five: Take a Selfie with your beer and all decked out in your rodeo garb

Post it to Instagram if you're under 25, post it to Twitter if you're between 25 and 40, and post it to Facebook if you're still using Facebook. Hashtag #Hicktown.

Step Six: Clown around

Continue to check your social media app of choice while awaiting the show's start, pausing briefly to watch Barrel Racing, Mutton Bustin', and the antics of Leon Coffee, everyone's favorite rodeo clown.

Step Seven: Get crazy

As the concert begins, forget everything that you knew about country and bask in the delay pedal guitar glory and thrashing drums that opens up "Crazy Town."

Step Eight (for ladies:) Let's dance

Grab four of your friends and treat the aisles of Reliant Stadium like a Saturday night at Wild West. Let the music guide you and dance, dance, dance. Don't hold back. The show depends on your performance just as much as Aldean's bravado.

Step Nine: Sing along

Sing along to every word of "When She Says Baby." If you don't know the words, that's OK. Reliant Stadium puts them on a LED screen in the corner of the building, and it's quite helpful.

Step Ten: Scream like crazy

Scream like crazy when Luke Bryan and Eric Church are introduced by Aldean as co-writers of "The Only Way I Know"...then deflate like a balloon when Aldean breaks the news that those two aren't actually here.

Step Eleven: After singing along for less than a verse of "The Only Way I Know," forget that Step Ten ever happened.

Step Twelve (applies exclusively to Jason Aldean): You're totally in control. Own that stage. Strut around, pump your fist, be yourself. Adapt lyrics to make the citizens of the city you're playing in feel special (I.E. sing ..."girls of Houston,Texas..", "...tattoos on this Texas town...", etc.)

Step Thirteen (applies exclusively to Aldean's drummer): Spin those sticks like your life depends on it. Remember, this isn't so much a concert as a public display of amplification. The more cowbell the better. You're not Jason Aldean, but the camera is going to be on you. A lot. Make the most out of that screen time. Drum with your face.

Step Fourteen: When Aldean sings "Amarillo Sky" from his self-titled debut album, there's actually a pretty bit of farming imagery in the lyrics. Listen closely. It's not Steinbeck, but it's there and it's going to be the highlight of the show. Perhaps the most sincere moment of the entire night.

Step Fifteen (for guys:) When Aldean asks "Where's all my dude's in the house tonight?" it's appropriate to respond loudly in an extra deep voice in order to prove that you are in fact a dude. Aldean can't see that far into the stands, so the vocal cues really help.

Step Sixteen: Do not, I repeat, do not, take Aldean's advice to buy a bottle of Southern Comfort after the show and take your girl to the outskirts of town. You're better than that and it won't turn out like the lyrics of "Night Train," I can almost guarantee.

Step Seventeen: It's a much better idea to relive the lyrics to "Tattoos on this Town" after the show. Go to The Hideout and dance to some honky-tonk music, or head to the carnival and win your sweetie a prize. Remember, you took the light rail to Reliant. There are a large amount of very cool bars and music venues along Main Street that will memorably extend anyone's Tuesday night. Have fun. Live it up.

Step Eighteen: There's a country-rap delivery in the middle of "Dirt Road Anthem." It's a lot of fun to chant along to, but be sure you get the words right.

Step Nineteen: If the words in Step Eighteen escape you, wave your hands back and forth during the chorus of "Dirt Road Anthem." It looks really cool when 72,088 fans in Reliant Stadium do it in unison.

Step Twenty: Starting with "She's Country" and ending with the show closer, "Hicktown," the last three songs of the set are an opportunity to do everything you've been doing throughout the show — only bigger, better, and louder. Though remember, kids are watching.

Setlist:

Crazy Town
Take a Little Ride
When She Says Baby
Big Green Tractor
The Only Way I Know
Fly Over States
Johnny Cash
Amarillo Sky
Night Train
Tattoos on this Town
Dirt Road Anthem
She's Country
My Kinda Party
Hicktown

Jason Aldean performed before a RodeoHouston crowd of 72,088.

Photo by Michelle Watson Catchlight Group

Jason Aldean performed before a RodeoHouston crowd of 72,088.

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Movie Review

Matt Damon and Ben Affleck square off in Netflix crime thriller The Rip

Photo by Claire Folger/Netflix

Ben Affleck and Matt Damon in The Rip.

For as closely tied together as Matt Damon and Ben Affleck are, it might come as a surprise how few times they’ve led a movie together. They’ve appeared alongside each other in Good Will Hunting, The Last Duel, and Air, but the only time they were on equal footing in a story was Kevin Smith’s Dogma. So the fact that they are the two true stars of the new Netflix movie The Rip makes it a rare opportunity for the longtime friends to square off against each other.

Damon and Affleck play Lt. Dane Dumars and Detective Sgt. J.D Byrne, respectively, the two highest ranking members of a Miami police department squad that specializes in drug and drug money raids. A tragedy to begin the film already has the team — which includes Detectives Mike Ro (Steven Yeun), Numa Baptiste (Teyana Taylor), and Lolo Salazar (Catalina Sandina Moreno) — on edge, with the FBI and DEA breathing down their neck.

Going off a tip, Dumars gathers the team to raid a house in nearby Hialeah that is supposed to have a stash of a relatively small amount of money. But when they get to the house occupied only by Desiree Molina (Sasha Calle), they discover close to $20 million. The team, required by law to count the money on site, must not only fight the urge to skim a little off the top for themselves, but also worry about the Cartel and other agencies that might want a slice of the pie.

Written and directed by Joe Carnahan, the film is a surprisingly effective crime thriller made even better by its high-quality cast, which also includes Kyle Chandler as a DEA agent. The story is designed for the audience to not know who’s trustworthy until the last possible second, and the various twists and turns it takes are well done, with barely a hint of narrative cheating.

Taking place entirely at night, the mood is set right from the start, with the only surprise being that Carnahan didn’t add in rain for extra effect. He keeps things tense with a number of subtle elements, including having the house located in a seemingly deserted cul-de-sac. This allows for the characters to remain on high alert at all times, with anything out of the ordinary — an unexpected noise, a flashing light, etc. — adding to the stress of the situation.

The only element that could have used a bit more of a punch-up is the characterization. The story is set up to cast suspicion on almost everybody, making it tougher to understand exactly what type of person each of them is. As the two leads, more time is spent with Dumars and Byrne, leaving everyone else with slightly underwhelming arcs. It’s to the credit of the actors that everyone else below Damon and Affleck is still compelling.

Damon and Affleck play their sometimes friendly, sometimes adversarial roles well, showing an ease together that’s a result of their friendship and the acting skills they’ve honed over 30+ years. Taylor, an Oscar hopeful for One Battle After Another, and Oscar nominee/Emmy winner Yeun have a pedigree that elevates their supporting roles. Chandler, Moreno, and Calle each get just enough to demonstrate why they were cast in their respective roles.

Damon and Affleck have had their individual ups and downs throughout their careers, but when they choose to work together, the results are usually good-to-great, as they are in The Rip. It’s a different take on a crime thriller that features a story that will keep viewers guessing until the very end.

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The Rip is now streaming on Netflix.

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