This Week in Hating

How to deal with "Kiosk Accosters" and avoid the shopping maul

I know exactly when I’ve been spotted.

I can feel the eyes sizing me up and in …3…2…1. Here comes the plastic smile and the pitch.

“M’am, have you tried this sea salt scrub? It will change your skin, your life.”

In a flash I’ve been a victim of "Kiosk Accostment," the uncomfortable and downright irritating practice of kiosk salespeople who insist upon interrupting an otherwise pleasant mall experience with guerilla tactics.

“No thank you,” I say brightly and keep on moving.

In a flash, the Kiosk Accoster is in front of me, blocking my path.

“But this is authentic, made with sea salts from the actual sea. And it’s salty. Here, let me give you some,” the K.A. says while attempting to grab my hand and smear it on.

And that’s when my manners and social graces start to teeter. That’s when I want to say something like this: “No, I DON’T want to try your salt scrub, nor do I want to smell a headache-inducing exotic oil. I have no interest in a mineral makeup makeover, getting my hair straightened and I will NEVER sit in the middle of a mall and get any body part threaded. NEVER. I will also never want a massage or teeth bleaching. In. The. Middle. Of. The. Mall.”

In this scenario, after I’ve made a bit of a fuss, other equally irritated shoppers begin cheering as the choral group from Glee sings "Don’t Stop Believing."

I spin around on my heels, give my hair a good flip and victoriously walk through the mall, never to be bothered by a Kiosk Accoster again.

That scenario takes place in my dreams. In reality, I put on my own fake smile and say, “Not today, thanks,” and keep walking.

And here’s the thing. As a writer, I know what it’s like to approach total strangers and engage them in conversation. I do it routinely for work and I know that most people assume you want something from them. I realize there are situations when, quite frankly, a person doesn’t want to comment or have time to be a part of a story and I respect that.

Like me, these Kiosk Accosters are trying to earn a living, but "No" means "No," people. If I actually do want what you’re selling, I will catch your eye. I will approach your booth. I will ask you questions.

Now, where’s that roasted nut kiosk? Something smells good.

unspecified

Thanks, Queen Bey

Pop icon Beyoncé donates $100,000 to University of Houston Law School

Photo by Erza Shaw Getty Images

undefined

Pop megastar Beyoncé Knowles-Carter has donated $100,000 to the University of Houston Law Center Criminal Justice Clinic through her BeyGOOD Foundation. The gift will allow the clinic to hire fill-time faculty to head it, benefiting the students who study there.

“I am delighted that the BeyGOOD Foundation has made this very generous gift to the UH Law Center,” said Leonard Baynes, dean of the UH Law Center. “Not only will this funding help establish a full-time criminal justice clinic that provides pro bono legal services in our community, but it will also supercharge our already excellent criminal law and justice programming.”

The clinic is one of nine at UHLC. It helps students learn to navigate the criminal justice system, especially on behalf of clients that are underserved by skilled attorneys. People of color are affected disproportionately by a lack of good, ethical representation.

Beyoncé, the most decorated artist in Grammy history and easily the biggest musical star native to Houston, has a long history of advocating for criminal justice reform. She was a staunch supporter of the police reform following the deaths of Alton Sterling and Philando Castile, asking law enforcement to “stop killing us” in a web post. In 2020, she penned an open letter to the Kentucky attorney general asking for justice in the death of Breonna Taylor.

Through her BeyGOOD Foundation, established in 2013, Beyoncé has focused mostly on expanding the prospects of Black-owned business and offering education opportunities to students. Forwarding the cause of legal representation in Texas while also helping out marginalized communities compliments her other philanthropic work.

“At UH Law, we envision a legal profession where ‘everyone has the opportunity to prosper,’ as BeyGOOD envisions, and we will achieve this vision by providing access to strong and effective legal representation in criminal proceedings,” Baynes said. “And together, through this gift, the BeyGOOD Foundation and UHLC will shepherd the next generation of criminal justice attorneys in the city of Houston, the state of Texas and the nation.”