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    A three-hour show?

    Melissa Etheridge's scandals blow away Lindsay Lohan's, but she's too good aperformer for anyone to notice

    Michael D. Clark
    Jul 31, 2010 | 8:07 am

    She's had her share of personal and medical hurdles during a 22-year recording career, but when it comes to the vulturous entertainment media all waiting for festering sores of juicy gossip to pop on celebrity skin, lady rocker Melissa Etheridge is absolute Teflon.

    No dirt sticks to this woman (who will rock Houston tonight).

    All anybody remembers is that she is lesbian (Hardly a scandal. Who isn't a lesbian these day?), she fought and won a valiant battle against breast cancer, and she has a set of the most powerful and delightfully corroded pipes since Janis Joplin when singing past hits like "I'm the Only One," and "Come To My Window."

    Imagine, for a moment, if it was revealed that Lindsay Lohan had:

    A). Stole actor Lou Diamond Phillips' wife from right under his "La Bamba"-singing nose.

    B). Had two babies with Phillips' ex which, were conceived with the help of a sperm donation from 1960s-folk-icon-turned-freaky-old-dude David Crosby (who knew that Crosby had that kind of potent "spirit" left after a lifetime of drugs and organ transplants?)

    C). Dumped the former Ms. "La Bamba" and got married to another woman who gave birth to twins (apparently, Crosby was not involved this time. No confirmation on if Neil Young was the "facilitator").

    D). Dumped the new wife — and got accused of being a deadbeat mom in doing it.

    E). Admits to smoking pot (for therapeutic reasons) and not paying California state taxes as a form of protest after the state passed Proposition 8, banning gay marriage.

    Are you kidding me? If this was Lohan's resume, TMZ would need to start its own cable network to satiate the coverage needs and endless hours of lame analysis but goofball talking heads.

    As it is, Etheridge hits Houston and all I can really think about is how great she is in concert.

    She sings like Joplin and performs like Bruce Springsteen, sometimes playing for three hours.

    Look for a generous helping of new album Fearless Love including including the title track which is about the first time she kissed a girl ... and liked it.

    Saturday, July 31

    Melissa Etheridge, 8 p.m. at the Verizon Wireless Theater

    Tickets $37.50-$102.50

    unspecified
    news/entertainment

    Movie Review

    Heartfelt animal adventure Hoppers is another Pixar classic

    Alex Bentley
    Mar 5, 2026 | 3:00 pm
    Mabel (Piper Kurda) and King George (Bobby Moynihan) in Hoppers
    Photo courtesy of Disney/Pixar
    Mabel (Piper Kurda) and King George (Bobby Moynihan) in Hoppers.

    For the first 15 years of their history, animation studio Pixar delivered one classic film after another, an astonishing streak that included their first 11 movies. Things got bumpy starting with Cars 2 in 2011, and even though the majority of their output has been good-to-great ever since, their releases are no longer considered slam dunks like they once were.

    They’re back with an original film, Hoppers, trying to return to form by going back to the animal world. The film centers on Mabel (Piper Kurda), a 19-year-old environmentalist who’s trying to stop a new highway being built by Mayor Jerry (Jon Hamm) in the fictional city of Beaverton. Her activism has as much to do with helping displaced local animals as it does with being nostalgic for her youth, in which she spent years observing nature with her Grandma Tanaka (Karen Huie).

    She finds an unlikely possible solution when she discovers that her college professors have created a system that allows them to transfer — or hop — their consciousness into animal-like robots. Hijacking a beaver robot, Mabel joins up with the local wildlife, including beaver King George (Bobby Moynihan) to try to convince them to help her execute her plan. But with the highway almost complete and Mayor Jerry willing to do anything to make it happen, Mabel might be too late.

    Directed by Daniel Chong and written by Jesse Andrews from a story by Chong, the film cycles through a variety of genres in its 105-minute running time, including comedy, drama, thriller, and even a touch of Pixar-style horror. When Pixar has been at its best, it seamlessly goes back and forth between genres, trusting that audiences will go along with them for the ride, and Hoppers feels like a return to form in that respect.

    Humor rules the day as Mabel adjusts to being part of the animal world while her professors desperately try to get her and their robot back. Mabel encounters not only wildly confusing things like “pond rules” (if a predator catches you, you don’t fight it), but also the existence of a hierarchy within the world that involves kings or queens from various animal classes like reptiles, birds, amphibians, fish, and insects. Her one-track mind and the way of the world she is invading clash in a variety of funny ways.

    As the film goes along, Chong, Andrews, and the rest of the filmmaking team also find a way to burrow into the audience’s heart. There are many elements that threaten to tip into eye-rolling territory, but the filmmakers consistently pull back before that happens. The number of fun characters on both the human and animal side helps in that regard, as does the simple yet profound message they’re trying to convey.

    Pixar has assembled one of the best voice casts in recent memory for this film, including such big names as Meryl Streep, Dave Franco, Melissa Villaseñor, Vanessa Bayer, and the late Isiah Whitlock, Jr. However, due to the sheer number of characters, only Kurda, Moynihan, and Hamm truly stand out. Still, they all fit together well and give the always-stellar animation even more life.

    Since the pandemic, Pixar has only released one truly great film (Inside Out 2), but with Hoppers and the seemingly bulletproof Toy Story 5 coming within a few months of each other, they might go back-to-back on that front. Like the classic films from the studio, it has goofy, heartfelt, and exciting parts, mixing together for an enthralling time at the theater.

    ---

    Hoppers opens in theaters on March 6.

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    news/entertainment

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