We are one of America's fattest cities
If Heart Attack Grill comes to Houston, a quadruple bypass burger — and hospitalstay — await
Professionalism reigns at HAG.
Coming Soon: Heart Attack Grill?
Le menu.
People donning hospital gowns and nurses in typically tight outfits chowing down together. Is this a cafeteria in the Texas Medical Center?
No, it's the Heart Attack Grill, a fat infusion that may soon be coming to a Houston strip mall near you. The grill's biggest selling point? Visitors who weigh in excess of 350 pounds may indulge in "all you can eat, every day, all day, every night, all night" food free of charge.
The grill, based in Chandler, Ariz., prides itself on offering consumers the fattiest foods they'll ever encounter. Its menu boasts the simple, double, triple and quadruple Bypypass Burgers, which can contain up to 8,000 calories, reports the Houston Business Journal. You won't find any leafy greens on these sandwiches.
Also on the menu are Flatliner Fries, which are deep fried in 100 percent lard. Jolt Cola and unfiltered Lucky Strike cigarettes, all doled out by waitresses dolled up in racy nurse attire, will round out your meal. If "patients" finish a triple or quadruple bypass, waitresses will wheel them to their vehicle in wheelchairs. What happens in the hatchback stays under wraps.
Don't hold your breath, though (and certainly stop drooling on your keyboard) — we may still have a bit to wait before we can take a bite at HAG.
"I believe that Houston is perhaps one of the finest cities in America, but I cannot confirm or deny as of yet whether or not I will be able to consummate a deal with the landlord," says "Dr." Jon Basso, who calls himself chief surgeon of chain.
"In the meantime," he adds, "if you're in Arizona, please stop by so that I may perform a Double Bypass on you."
To sate your breastaurant cravings in Houston, for now, just hop on the highway and head to Galveston.
