Foodie News

Groceries or die: 'Whole Foods Parking Lot' video chronicles yuppie warfare

Groceries or die: 'Whole Foods Parking Lot' video chronicles yuppie warfare

whole foods parking lot
whole foods parking lot
whole foods parking lot

Are you anxiously awaiting the Montrose Whole Foods Market opening on Wednesday? You better bring your game face.

Whether you crave the quinoa or just know someone who does, you have to love the new yuppie thug life anthem "Whole Foods Parking Lot," written and performed by Los Angeles composer David Wittman (a.k.a. DJ Dave).

Wittman reps his Prius and, as he raps his grocery list of organic chicken, kale salad, a lemon twist and "a decent pinot noir for under $20," he waxes about the trials and tribulations of being trendy and upwardly mobile.

Namely: Guys on iPhones hogging the aisles, Kombucha getting pulled, tiny grocery carts, running out of Humboldt Fog cheese, paying $80 for six items and, most of all, people who steal your parking space. Now that will make you want to pop a cap in somebody's ass.

Watch it for yourself — does it remind you of the Houston Whole Foods and Central Markets?

Whole Foods Parking Lot