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Bye, Bye Brown

The Mack Brown Error is over at UT with Longhorns' pitiful Alamo Bowl loss

Michael Corcoran
Longhorns Alamo Bowl
Longhorns lose Alamo Bowl in last game for coach Mack Brown. Photo courtesy of UT Athletics

Imagine a legendary rock band playing its final show and making everyone realize, yep, it’s time to retire.

Texas was miserable Monday night at the Alamo Bowl, losing 30-7 to an Oregon team that didn’t look very good.

The highlight of Mack Brown’s final game after 16 years coaching Texas was a missed field goal by Oregon to keep it a two-possession game. Didn’t think it was possible for something concerning Ducks to be more boring than the Duck Dynasty controversy. The Horns played so badly that SeaWorld boycotted them.

The Horns played so badly that SeaWorld boycotted them.

Let’s give Case McCoy credit for beating A&M in 2011 and Oklahoma this year. But he sucked worse than Samoan ballet in his final game as a football player, passing for 48 yards and two interceptions — both returned for touchdowns. Tyrone Swoopes actually came into the game with the outcome in question and didn’t do much better, thanks to Tragic Mike Davis, who dropped a perfect 60-yard bomb that could’ve turned things around.

The defense played well against the high-flying Ducks, but they barely had time to take a leak on the sidelines before the offense went for another three-and-out, playing for field position rather than a wild fling.

Mack Brown will be $5 million poorer next year because he put it all on Garrett Gilbert in 2009, not returning calls from Robert Griffin III and Johnny Manziel because he thought he had the next Andrew Luck. Gilbert fell apart, taking a mutiny on the scrutiny, and Case McCoy and David Ash stepped in to prove just how important it is to have a great quarterback by being mediocre ones.

The Mack Error is over. The past four years have been a drag. The team that wins the Alamo Bowl is the one that’s pissed off to be there. For too long, the Horns have performed like they’re just happy to be alive. The once-great geezers have played their final concert. And I thought it would never end. 

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