Women's Halloween hemlines seem to get shorter and shorter each year as the bank of sexy dress up options become more and more absurd.
We can't tell yet if it's a good thing or a bad one, but there has unarguably been a separate-but-equal response in the men's costume section — all seemingly created for little reason other than to draw attention to the fact of the phallus.
Take this Skeleboner suit, for example, which comes equipped with a hand-held air pump to help the wearer "rise to the occasion."
We have no doubt that you'll score a date while baring your sausage to the world in this Longuini and Meatballs apron, because who doesn't love a man who can cook.
Good luck getting close enough to dance dirty while wearing this Genie in the Lamp getup. Luckily, the unsubtle message — "Rub Me" — ensures that your junk will get some attention during Trick-or-treating.
Charm your snake and the ladies with this Snake Charmer costume — and just add brown face and a bindi for for maximum cultural insensitivity.
This Hung like a Horse costume leaves little to the imagination — but you'd better have something to back you up if you go around making such big claims.
Carry a bayonet to appear politically informed and well-endowed.
